NFL 2021: Week Sixteen Candles

The Game Room
1

Happy Holidays!!!

After a few weeks of skulking in the background, COVID decided it had enough and jumped back into the #1 news story for the NFL. More than 150 players are on the Covid list, including Austin Ekeler, dumbfuck Cole Beasley (I don’t like rooting for a killer virus, but in Cole’s, Kirk Cousins’s and Aaron Rodger’s case, I’ll make an exception), and Jared Goff. And the Chiefs are your dumbass team of the week, with 10 players joining the Covid list this week, including Tyreek Hill, Travis Kelce, and their kicker Harrison Butker. However, more players with positive tests might be able to join in games as the NFL tweaks protocols and stops giving a shit about appearances. So, in true NFL fashion, the NFL will test less and allow asymptomatic (does anyone really expect players to tell the truth? Really?) to play quickly after a positive test. I guess the idea is to get everyone in the NFL infected with Covid’s omicron variant quickly, so they don’t have to worry about vaccine boosters, waning immunity, or transmission when the playoffs get here.

In more fun news, the NFL has announced its Pro Bowl rosters, list available here. Not a ton of surprises, as usual. Undeserving big names make it (Alvin Kamara, Bobby Wagner, Lamar Jackson). Unknown studs get ignored (Creed Humphrey, Jeremiah Owusu Koramoah). Par for the course. And lest you think the Pro Bowl rosters mean something, remember that Mitch Trubisky played in a Pro Bowl.

We’re still in the throes of playoff/coach firing days. My predictions: Vikings and Ravens make it, Matt Nagy doesn’t.

Finally, if you’re interested in more life-affirming news, here’s a quick story about Trent Williams and his battle to return to the NFL (He made the ProBowl!) after a terminal cancer diagnosis.

Enough rambling, here’s your games:

THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL

San Francisco 49ers @ Tennessee Titans (+3, 44.5)

SATURDAY

Cleveland Browns @ Green Bay Packers (-7.5, 45.5 )
Indianapolis Colts @ Arizona Cardinals (-1.5, 49)

SUNDAY

Early

New York Giants @ Philadelphia Eagles (-10.5, 42)
Los Angeles Rams @ Minnesota Vikings (+3, 49.5)
Buffalo Bills @ New England Patriots (-1.5, 44.5)
Tampa Bay Buccaneers @ Carolina Panthers (+14, 48)
Jacksonville Jaguars @ New York Jets (-2, 41.5)
Detroit Lions @ Atlanta Falcons (-5, 44.5)
Los Angeles Chargers @ Houston Texans (+10.5, 47.5)
Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals (-2.5, 43.5)

Late

Chicago Bears @ Seattle Seahawks (-7.5, 43.5)
Pittsburgh Steelers @ Kansas City Chiefs (-10.5, 46.5)
Denver Broncos @ Las Vegas Raiders (-1, 42.5)

SUNDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL

Washington Football Team @ Dallas Cowboys (-10, 47.5)

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL

Miami Dolphins @ New Orleans Saints (-3, 40.5)

Another interesting Thursday night game as the Niners and Titans are battling for the playoffs. The Titans have lost 3 of the last 4 and I kinda think they’re an illusion (they get to play the Texans and Jaguars twice a year), but they’ve beaten the Bills, Chiefs, Rams and Colts, so maybe they’re not. And I think the Niners are built to make noise as the weather gets rougher. Definitely a watchable game.

Both games Saturday are interesting matchups. The Browns are still covid/injury decimated, but still in the playoff hunt and the Packers just keep chugging along. But the Colts and Cards could easily be the game of the week. How the Cards respond to the loss to the Lions (yes, that is not a typo) and having to lay a solid team will be fascinating. Jonathon Taylor and that stellar Oline have to drag that Colts offense. They’re fun to watch.

Bills/Patriots is the early game to watch. Unless there are 40 MPH winds again, I expect a much better showing by the Bills, but it will be interesting to see if Brian Daboll adjusts his playcalling/offensive scheme against a Patriots defense that has the tendency to make them look silly. Vikings/Rams is another to check out if you have the time.

Skip the late games. I suppose Covid could make the Chiefs game interesting, but … nah. Eat your leftovers and take a nap instead. Hell, maybe just sleep through the Sunday night game too.

Monday night’s game could be sneaky great to watch. The stakes are high, as the losing team is likely out of the playoff hunt. Did you know the “resurgent” Dolphins have won 6 games in a row? Amazing, right? Did you also know those wins were against the Texans, Panthers, Giants, and the Jets twice? The only not absolutely shitty team they beat was the Ravens and they needed a defenisve touchdown and turnovers to do it. They’re all smoke and mirrors. But the game shapes up to be a defensive battle, with whatever team’s QB hurts their team less the likely determining factor.

So, what do you want for the Holidays? Any ProBowl snubs have you infuriated? Let’s from you!

2

There were six teams that had no roster selections: Broncos, Giants, Jaguars, Jets, Lions and Texans.

Makes sense.

3

Anyone seen the new Kurt Warner film?

It’s not playing at any AMC cinema here, so I wonder if it’s a heavily religious film catered to thT audience.

I wasn’t aware of it but a guy who I know is a very evangelical Christian mentioned it to me, knowing that I’m a Warner fan.

4

Nice to see that AJ Brown is allowed to literally throw the DB to the ground in order to get open without a penalty being called.

5

It’s nice to see an average NFL QB leading his team to a victory in a close game.

The above statement is true no matter the outcome of tonight’s game.

6

It’s a shame they lost tonight. They played OK and their QB is good, but just wasn’t special enough tonight.

Also true no matter the outcome of tonight’s game.

7

I thought it might be titled Sweet Sixteen. I doubt the Browns can beat the Packers, but it’s a season of upsets. Still rooting for the Chiefs, Ravens, and Buccs.

8

Ah hell naw with that silly Ratbird talk. For one it looks like Lamar may still not play, but IDC if he does. We kicked their asses once, and the team is prepared to do so again. This is literally a playoff game for both teams. Not sure why Hamlet skipped over that game. Should be good.

Who Dey!

9

Ugh, I hope this isn’t what I think it is, but WFT safety Deshazor Everett was in a car crash last night and killed the passenger.

10

Here’s the press release from the Sherrif’s Office:

https://www.loudoun.gov/CivicAlerts.aspx?AID=7229

The driver of a 2010 Nissan GT-R was traveling north on Gum Spring Road near Ticonderoga Road when around 9:15 p.m. the vehicle left the right side of the roadway, struck several trees, and rolled over.

11

Ravens may have a problem, Tayler Huntley is now on the Covid list

I really don’t want a longer season

12

I looked up Josh Johnson and had to add “QB” to my search because he’s like the 4th best known player with that name in the NFL. :roll_eyes:

He’s got lots of experience though, so they should be good! Check out this stellar career:

Someone who’s been on so many teams must be fantastic!

13

NFL teams had to do the same search for a warm body.

14

And now it’s Mike Williams for the Chargers who goes on the Covid list.

15

Mayfield is 14/16 passing in 1st half. Unfortunately, 3 of those completions are to the Packers.

16

Aaron Rodgers is now the Packers’ all-time leader in passing touchdowns.

17

I can’t take watching Baker this year. They should’ve done the surgery and sat him about 6 weeks ago. His mechanics are ad-hoc unless he has full time and space to step into it. He looks like his mobility/leg injuries are doing better, but his upper body strength without stepping into it is still erratic. I think it’s probably the separated shoulder.

18

You know people really haven’t been disgusted enough by cramming commercials directly into the broadcast like they’ve been doing over the last 2 years. Where the game is shown in a window in the background but 80% of the screen and the audio are a commercial.

19

So they’re running at will, only need a field goal, can’t have Baker drop back without making an interception, and have all 3 timeouts left, and they pass it 4 fucking times in a row at the end. Fucking stupid.

Obvious DPI that enabled the game-sealing interception.

Browns are a 10 win team with Case Keenum. It’s pretty much the ideal setup for a game manager.

20

I bet there’s never been a team that has been more impacted in a season by bad PI calls and PI non-calls. The Browns have lost like 3 games based on terrible PI calls against them, and probably lost 2 games based on non-calls by obvious DPI.