You forgot
2.4. Send dick picks, while wearing crocs, to a woman who isn’t your wife.
In team ownership news:
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It looks like the group led by Josh Harris (co-owner of the Philadelphia 76ers and New Jersey Devils) has reached a deal with the Snyders to buy the Commanders.
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Tom Brady is reportedly in talks to become a limited partner in ownership of the Raiders; Brady is already a minority owner of the WNBA’s Las Vegas Aces, which, like the Raiders, have Mark Davis as their majority owner.
Both moves would be subject to approval from the other team owners.
Considering the Raiders were on the losing end of the Tuck Rule Game, that would be very funny if Brady became a minority owner.
Teams are putting out their schedule release videos, and this one from the Titans is absolutely hilarious:
Broncos did an imitation of The Office, with Angela.
It’s 3 seconds long…?
Let’s see if this plays better.
ETA: I guess Discourse just can’t handle it. If you click it works. And it’s pretty damn funny.
Bryce Young, rookie savior quarterback for the Panthers, showed up to minicamp. Lots of people noticed just how small he looks.
His height isn’t a big deal to me, but he looks scrawny.
Quarterback Matt Ryan, who was released by the Colts in March, announced that he’s joining CBS as an NFL analyst.
However, he also stated, in his announcement of this: “P.S. – this is not a retirement post,” suggesting that he’s still hoping to land a roster spot with an NFL team for this season. OTOH, he turns 38 this week, and had a bad season with the Colts last year, getting benched twice, so there may not be much of a market left for him.
Ryan is still owed around $12 million by the Colts. If he officially retires he forfeits that money.
Wouldn’t that only apply if he was still with the Colts? Since he was cut he’s getting that money regardless.
Probably just putting that out there for when the inevitable injury happens during the season and a team is desperate for a quarterback.
Apparently not. As the ESPN article describes it:
I agree, that seems to be a more likely path for him, for playing this season. Somebody loses their QB1 in the preseason or in the first few weeks of the season, and gets desperate.
So, the 49ers after Purdy, Lance and Darnold are all on crutches week 15 (and inexplicably 11-3)?
Late to this, but we have to acknowledge that the truth is probably something both far stupider and far more shady than any of these run-of-the-mill idiotic suggestions. When it comes to Snyder and Irsay, two folks who’ve already traded dumb bombs in the press over the last year, literally anything is possible.
News out of NY about Rodgers and the Jets:
Complimenting the quarterback for the speed with which he’d acclimated to their team, members of the New York Jets coaching staff told reporters Wednesday they were impressed by how quickly Aaron Rodgers was complaining about the roster. … “To have a veteran QB show from day one how seriously he takes grumbling about his teammates, it’s really inspiring our younger guys to bitch and moan as well.”
(yes, it’s The Onion)
It looks like the 3rd QB rule is back and I approve.
I’m sure we will get more details but it looks similar to the way it was before. Designate a 3rd QB for emergency only if the first two go down without having to sacrifice a roster spot that coaches would rather have for a special teams guy.
The league has awarded hosting the 2025 draft to Green Bay. It’ll be a logistical challenge, as the area only has about 4,600 hotel rooms, while they expect to draw roughly 240,000 attendees (as per this article in the Green Bay Press-Gazette, which may be behind a paywall). It’s expected that attendees will be staying as far away as Milwaukee and Madison.
I assume Green Bay gets the draft as they’ll never get a Super Bowl.
It’s a big meh for me. I’ve almost gotten to the point of being ok with reading the results in the newspaper the next morning as the hype has gotten ridiculous
I’ve had this attitude for years. Once I find out who the overall #1 pick is, I lose interest until my team makes its selection. And if I don’t find that out until the next morning, so be it.