Well, now, that’s pretty, uh, descriptive there, young fella. (Glad to hear you had a good time.:))
I do not suggest black or charcoal for a wedding. Its supposed to be a happy time! I just went to a wedding & tons of people were wearing black & I thought they look nice but not for the occassion. Navy is nice, light gray acceptable.
Consider if its going to be hot. You dont want to wear wool.
(& those stupid cameras they put on the tables. I didn’t know we weren’t supposed to take them back & process them but we did. 
What’s wrong with black? I mean, the groom is usually wearing black, right?
I’m trying to find a dress to wear to an upcoming wedding, and I’m having a terrible time, for whatever reason. If I find a dress that flatters me, and it happens to be black-- well, I may have thought twice before, but not anymore!
Black is not always somber and sad…it can also be rather sexy.
You should probably give a copy of those pictures to the bride and groom, if any turned out. After my sister-in-law’s wedding, they developed all those cameras and ended up with hundreds of crappy pictures, and very few of the touching, candid shots of family and friends that you are supposed to get. If some people had swiped some of those cameras, it wouldn’t have been a big loss.
“You should probably give a copy of those pictures to the bride and groom” Yeah, we asked him & we sent them to him. The only pics that didnt turn out were those that the bratty kid took.
Black for weddings? Naw. One woman said it best for me. She said she was going to her exboyfriends’ wedding & she would wear all black. If you catch my drift.
I think people wear black often for weddings cause that’s all they have to wear.
Bingo there, handy. One suit’s all I’ve got. That, however, brings up another question.
See, I really am a dork. And, not to be redundant, I’m a Washingtonian. That’s why I want…
…a seersucker suit.
With the aforementioned bowtie. Last weekend would have been the perfect weather for it. And nothing says “what the fuck is he wearing?” like a seersucker suit with red suspenders and a crooked bowtie, if you ask me.
Which you probably shouldn’t.
Am I allowed to wear seersucker outside of the Emily guide-Posts of Labor Day and Memorial Day? Isn’t there a weather permitting clause or something?
Sofa King, I had a superfly suit, but I threw it out.
Try thrift shops they have very nice suits these days for around $10. One time I took my brother to get a linen jacket there for $10 because the weather was too hot for anything else.
It costs less to buy a suit from the thrift shops then it does to have one dry cleaned. I know cause I work for three thrift shops
That’s a fantastic idea, handy, and fits nicely into my diminishing budget. Thanks.
You are not supposed to wear black or white at a wedding. White should not be worn by a guest for the obvious reason that only the bride should wear white and maybe the flower girl (but if you have a flower girl you are going down the wrong road anyways but I digress)
You shouldn’t wear black for several reasons. Some people say it is bad luck. Or if you wear black to morn the wedding of someone you have the hots for you probably should not attend as morniong is not appropriate for a wedding. However if it is an formal evening wedding with a non-traditional flair black would be ok.
Well, these people are going to have a flower girl. I am her mother :). Why is a flower girl “going down the wrong road?” (I am not offended…I am just curious.)
Also, I remember one guy who wore a white suit to my wedding. It was a dubious fashion choice, but should I have been offended?
OK. But, if black is such “bad luck”, why is it OK for the groom and the groomsmen to wear it? I agree that it would be in poor taste to wear black in “mourning” at a wedding, but as long as you don’t look like you are going to a funeral, shouldn’t it be OK?
May I hijack this thread, since Sofa King’s wedding is over with? I am fairly desperate. It’s going to be an afternoon wedding, indoors, in Pittsburgh in a little more than two weeks. My husband’s brother is getting married, my husband will be the best man (he’s wearing a tux), and my daughter will be the flower girl (I guess I don’t get to see her dress until I get to Pittsburgh, since it’s not here now.) The invitation doesn’t say it’s formal, but I doubt that things will be too casual, either…they are spending enough. All I see are prom dresses, casual dresses, and shapeless sundresses that make me look like I’m a mile wide (I do have sizeable breasts and hips, but I have a waist as well. Not that you could tell in these dresses!) I’d rather avoid anything strapless or backless, since finding the appropriate brassiere in my size might be more of a challenge than finding the dress. I’m a size 14, so that makes “misses” and “plus” sizes both fair game.
Then, to top all that, a significant portion of these dresses are black (a few are white, too…they are easy to avoid.)
Any suggestions? Commiseration?
What do Zebras wear to weddings, anyway?
Well to my own wedding (afternoon formal) I did wear a black tux. I wanted to wear a white jacket and look like Rick in Casablanca but was talked out of it. (sigh)
I have attended weddings wearing my brugandy jacket or there is the standard tan pants/navy sports jacket.
Fashion speaking black is for evenings. If the reception is expected to go into the night black could be ok for the ceremony try to set it off with a shawl of some color. At this time of year (spring) you should be wearing spring like colors. Of course the most important accessory for a wedding is a smile.
I personally think the flower girl and ring bearer is tacky and a bad idea if the kids are too young (which they often are) as they detract from the couple getting married who should be the focus. Having to drag the boy down the asile or the girl who dosen’t drop the flowers or when one of them gets bored and starts picking their nose while hanging about the altar is just not the sort of thing I wanted at my wedding or want to see at a wedding. But to each their own.
Tamex, the rule is that one does not upstage the groom or the bride. So one shouldn’t wear black cause thats for the groom to wear & white’s for the bride to wear (Usually). You don’t wear a tux of any color either cause it upstages the groom (unless you’re a best man, but the thing about being the best man is you don’t get to prove it).
However, cream is alright.
A black or midnight blue tux is what a male guest is supposed to wear to a formal evening wedding; women would normally wear long gowns [evening dresses, not ball gowns]). Fancy daytime weddings (technically, if it’s during the day, it can’t be “formal”) call for morning coats for men, long gowns or tea-length dressy dresses for women (but not sequins or other “evening” decorations). White tie and tails is what a man wears to a very formal evening wedding; a woman wears a ball gown (no sleeves, low neckline, full skirt).
(Obviously, someone could have a very casual evening wedding, at which wearing a tux would be inappropate. The best bet is to find out what style of wedding the people are having and dress accordingly.)
I do agree that women shouldn’t wear an all-white outfit (competes with the bride) or an all-black one (just not appropriate), although I do see lots of women wearing black dresses; I’ve even seen some bridesmaids in them. But I don’t like it.
Zebra: My daughter’s 4.5 (well, will be on the 9th), and, IMHO, rather mature for her age. (Preschool teachers think so, too.) I have confidence. I can see what you mean, though. I didn’t have any flower/ring children at my wedding. I’m kind of surprised they wanted one, personally. Don’t really know why. But, she is cute.
handy: I could never upstage the groom. He’s something like 6’ 4" and 350 lbs. And the best man is the best man. I know. 
missbunny: Your guidelines for a fancy daytime wedding seem to mesh with my instincts. However, the guys are wearing tuxes…:rolleyes: I am just having trouble finding that. Especially since this is prom season. I think that if this were an evening wedding or a more casual wedding, I would have found something long ago, perhaps in the closet, even. My SILs seem to be going the “ball gown” route, from what I’ve gathered, anyway…and that seems like a bit too much for me.
I am trying to avoid black and white, but black seems to be “in” and prevalent. I know what you guys mean by spring colors, but why are they all pukey spring colors this year? That green which is like my parents’ old living room curtains, circa 1973, that “butter” yellow, that “dusty” pink, that “brassiere” beige/tan. Bleah!
last wedding I went to I wore formal: black Prince Charlie jacket and bow tie, kilt, sporran, and sgian dubh.
You know what? a kilt is a babe-magnet. My Beloved was beating them off me.
True.
False.
Properly, all the men at the wedding are supposed to dress formally, which means the same level of formality as the groom. It is perfectly appropriate for a man to show up at a wedding in a tux or a dark suit. The groom is still easy to pick out - he’s the one with the goofy grin and the bride on his arm.
I don’t mind black dresses at weddings as long as they’re not too somber - some flashy jewelry goes a long way to get rid of the mourning look. A colored scarf or wrap can help with some dresses, too. I don’t like black bridesmaid dresses, though.
Tamex, for an indoor afternoon wedding, you don’t want a floor-length dress like the prom dresses - you want a nice bright knee-length dress. I’ve actually had better luck finding such things at places like Marshall’s than at upscale department stores.
Don’t mistake me for a fashion correspondent, after all I started this thread.
Let me also add that I’m a complete fool, because I misplaced my 1956 edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette. I’ve found it now. Here’s what she (or her editing team) had to say then:
WHAT TO WEAR TO A WEDDING
Always, the choice of clothes depends upon the size and time of the wedding as well as the customary practices of the community… Women wear street length day dresses before noon. At noon and up to six-o’clock, skirts may be longer. Hats are a requirement and gloves are correct.
…
As a general rule the women in the first group wear low-neck-and-no-sleeves evening dresses with flowers or feathers or hair ornaments, or wear a lace scarf over their hair and shoulders in church. In the second group they wear simpler evening dresses with sleeves. In the third, they wear afternoon dresses, sometimes with small becoming hats or else a flower.
When not going to the reception, whatever clothes are worn habitually to church are correct. (pp. 267-268)
Um, yeah. Hope that helps.
(Also, I think I did okay: "[T]oday very few men wear anything more formal than plain business suits, either dark blue or dark gray [charcoal counts, in my book]… The sports coat of today is as out of place for a guest as it would be for a groom!)
Finally :). I went to a different Dayton’s (soon to be a.k.a. Marshall Field’s) than the one I went to before, and I found it. It’s not black, either. It’s hot pink, light pink, and orange (May sound bad, but it’s really not.) It’s a long, slim dress in a sort of Oriental style, sleeveless, with a Mandarin collar, three (non-functioning) frogs across the front of my right shoulder, and two long slits up either side. I bought a pair of hot pink fishnet stockings, and a pair of hot pink pantyhose. Haven’t decided which one I’ll wear yet :).
The best part is that it looks good with long, straight hair . I may put it up, but I don’t have to.
I also bought a black dress (also sleeveless, just above ankle length) at JC Penney. I’ll wear that to the rehearsal dinner.
Sofa King, it’s tough to know the “standards” of a community that I’ve never been to before. I think I’ll be OK, though. Things have changed a bit, haven’t they? Good thing I don’t have to look for a hat and gloves as well.
You’re kidding, right? If not… please accept my heartfelt plea…
Oh please, PLEASE don’t get a seersucker suit. Especially if you want to be a chick magnet. The last guy to look okay in a seersucker suit was… um, okay, I can’t even think of one.
Most women I know see all those little lines on the suit squiggle together to form into the words: “Hi. Don’t ever sleep with me. Mmm-kay?”
If it is really hot outside, you are likely to be much cooler (in all its different meanings) if you show up naked rather than wearing seersucker anything.
Just my plea for the future of your sexuality…
Pink
(sorry, I had to say that last thing, cause it rhymed)
Orville Redenbacher. Mr. Popcorn.
Personally, I kinda like 'em. They look very old fashioned. Try http://www.landsend.com They sell lots of seersucker stuff and you might just get lucky! Great quality.
Black leather vest,
Iron Maiden “Eddie Lives Tour” T-shirt (with only TWO rips)
Black jeans,
And your GOOD belt; the thick shiney one with the Harley Davidson beltbuckle,
and, of course, your good black leather sneakers.
Don’t forget to tell the DJ he doesn’t know what he’s doing if he doesn’t play AC/DC and Skynyrd back-to-back.
But this only works if you’re driving a two-toned late-70s Camaro (and spell it “Camero”) - One of those tones must be primer.
…the number of times I’d seen this as “appropriate dress” is… well… let’s just say I don’t bat an eye anymore.
…glad to hear you had a good time, Sofa. You did good!