If you’re gonna charge $10.50 for parking, wouldn’t it make sense to keep a roll of quarters around?
Ahhh, that feels better.
Ladies and gentlemen:
Due to tragic, unforseen circumstances involving a chainsaw and a crazed Rabbi, this rant has been severely truncated.
We will reschedule the remainder of this no-doubt-hilarious rant at a later date for your viewing pleasure.
In the meantime, please stand by.
I like this one. Short and sweet, yet conveys all the necessary information. Kind of like haiku. Come to think of it…
$10.50 to park?
And yet you have no quarters?
You are a moron.
All good rants can be summed up in seventeen syllables.
Outrageous parking
fees are an anathema
I do not have change
<South Park>
“How much do you need?”
“About tree-fitty.”
“Tree-fitty?!?! Get outta heya, you Goddamn Loch-Ness Monsta!”
</South Park>
It’s all I could think of when I read this. 
Parking is like war;
No quarter asked, none given.
Will you take five dimes?
[Steve Buscemi mode]
King Clip-on Tie here
Big fucking man. With no change
Get some new specie
[/Buscemi]
Ten-fifty you say?
No change have I; Here’s a ten.
Fuck you very much.
or…
Parking attendant
doesn’t think to keep quarters
dumb motherfucker.
Even if I did
Have the change that you request
You would not get it
Why? Because you don’t
Get it: Charging 10.50
Requires quarters.
Quarters from your side,
You fucking dingleberry,
Not quarters from me.
You folks are obviously missing the simple beauty of the lukewarm rant juxtaposed against the ranter’s username.
As it is, I really thought I would see something along the lines of:
But, alas, it was merely a lukewarm rant.
Thanks for the great poetry guys, I was LMAO. I think I’ll take a stab at a haiku rant.