No, you festering little twerp, I did NOT steal yer damned soda.

Ok ,here’s the backstory first. I work at a brand spanking new hospital here in North Dakota. I work in the Materials Management department. I am the sole graveyard shift coverage person for that department. I work alone. Tonight I get to work, and there is a note from my boss in my mailbox. It says, “Will, stop taking peoples’ sodas from the fridge.” I am livid. I do not steal. I don’t drink the fetid swamp water in question. I call my boss at home. She tells me that one of our warehouse guys told her that I was taking his orange pop out of the fridge. It had to be me because it was happening when he was not around, i.e. at night. I tell her that (a). I do not take peoples sodas, I bring my own from home, and (b) I would sooner put a gun to my head and blow my brains out than to voluntaraly drink an orange pop. She weakly accepts this, but I can tell she has her doubts. So now, here I am looking like a friggin thief because a diminuitive dickweed pothead, who probibly drank the damned things himself and forgot, accuses me of taking his motherloving orange pop. The same idiot who should have been fired at least three times in the last four months. (He went around to everyone asking what they were making, he filled out job apps to other companies while at work on the clock, and he constantly lets loose with loud obcenity filled diatribes about the hospital, it’s management and the people he works with.) The only reason the little jerk even has a job is that the job market is so tight here in Fargo that you cannot find good, bad, or even living people to work.

I hope he gets an incurable disease and racks up huge medical bills.

Thank you for your time. That is all.

What have you got against orange soda???

It isn’t Mt. Dew, spooje.

I can’t speak for everyone else, but I would sooner put a gun to my head and blow my brains out than drink Mt. Dew spooje.

Ender, I think you speak for all of us. I too would rather put a gun to your head and blow out your brains than have to drink Mt. Dew spooje.

Buy a six pack of the exact same sodas and keep the receipt will. Leave one out on your desk at all times just to put a kink in this lamewad’s pecker.

If he takes it from your work area, there might be the opportunity to get his sorry @ss fired.

Wow, and here I sit drinking an orange soda…
I like Zensters plan, because opening one of his bottles and adding LSD would be a little over the edge.

Hell, he’d probably consider that a favor. :slight_smile: I know this pothead would.

I wouldn’t be so sure. Not all potheads take acid, I was a pothead for close to ten years before I did. From what I have heard, some people who HAVE taken acid have had pretty bad experiences when it was slipped to them because they weren’t expecting it. Also, the LAST thing you want to do when you are on acid is be at work, he’d probably make up some lame excuse to go home early if he didn’t start freaking out.