The Ark was the world’s first (and largest) TARDIS.
Boom, done. 
Largest TARDIS? Is that possible?
TARDIS: the only thing in the 'verse that can contain a TARDIS.
(Fun with recursion!)
Objects in the Bible work best when they are at least slightly contradictory.
I love this so much. People trying to find factual evidence of something an allegedly 600-year-old man did.
You know how dogs like to eat their own poo? Well all animals did that back in ye olden days. Basically Noah just hooked all the animals up, with ropes and harnesses, human centipede style. The problem solved itself.
Bovine Centipede?
No, not a book, silly! A jellybean dispenser.
He didn’t even collect the right quantities!
Lousy Noah count…
Of course. Moses, Elijah, Noah, etc, would only follow a Christian God. 
Noah’s Wife; “I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you can impregnate all of them. The bad news is that’s because none of them are yours. BTW, thanks for the rescue. kthxsluvu.”
You mean one of these? This company has a whole line with different animals (reindeer, bull, sheep, penguin, etc). All you would have to supply is an ark.
Actually many animals do hibernate like bears.
Actually I do believe the basis for the story is true. A man was inspired by God to gather many animals into an ark to survive a major flood. There is enough evidence in worldwide flood myths plus many artifacts around Mt. Ararat that point to some large ship sized structure. I’ll have to look around but basically they have found a depression in the ground that has a ship-shape that contains many heavy carbon and even some iron deposits consistent with this being the remains of a massive eroded wooden ship. Plus nearby are heavy anchor stones sitting in a village miles away from any ocean. Turkey has even built a visitors center there.
Now can we prove this is Noah’s Ark and not just an old eroded cow barn? No.
Bless your heart.
Here is one link: http://www.wyattmuseum.com/noahsark.htm I cannot find the best links right now but their are some interesting things like before I mentioned the large anchor stones.
Again, unless one finds a 6,000 year old bronze plaque that says “This is Noah’s Ark” you cannot really prove anything. And even then who knows.
Another massive contradiction: The Bible has two consecutive and utterly contradictory stories telling how young David first came to the attention of King Saul.
I read this entire unfunny thread just to make sure I’d be the first to tell you that you’re the only funny thing in it, you stupid person.
To say that, you must have missed Biffy’s contribution (and all the subsequent shout-outs).
You’re kidding, right? That link is more full of horseshit than the aforementioned bottom of the ark.