Heh, I know a spattering about many different subjects, but am nowhere near an expert in any of them. I am good at decorating cakes, but Im also sure that theres somewhere here who can beat my 6 months of commercial cake-deorating experience! Beyond that, I ain’t got nutt’n.
Not to bask in your discomfort or anything, but I am afraid I am going to have to ask for a cite on that one.
Preferably one with pictures.
You will have ::checks watch:: at least 2hrs 30 to come up with a good link (as I won’t be able to click on it from work). Please do remember the “two-click” rule, as I would not want to get home and find the link broken by a mod. Really people, do I need to remind you of our strict citations policy?!?
::d&r::
Comparative mythology. I consider myself a somewhat expert, and, well, I haven’t seen anyone jump on the bandwagon on that one. 
Y’all would be hard-pressed to match my horror and revulsion of arachnids. Anything with 8 legs. Hell, even seeing dogs mate (8 legs, 4 eyes…bleargh!) gives me the willies. Yes, I declare myself to be this site’s greatest arachnophobe.
I’ll go toe to toe with anyone here about insurance–pick a line, baby. Of course, I’ll always cover for the several other insurance gurus around here, just like they do for me. It’s a guild rule.
Yeah, I need to figure out who the heck you are. I’m fairly certain I probably know people you know(know any rower’s currently or previously in Austin?). Are gonna go to Seattle in August?
I can definitely hang with the best of them on this board when it comes to car modifications. Of course, people never ask those types of questions; it’s always “why won’t my car start?” and there are other members who are more qualified than I to answer that.
I could go with fibre-channel protocol, which is so mind-numbingly dull that I don’t expect anyone to challenge me (unless a coworker is on here).
Or Neolithic to early bronze age Irish tomb construction (excepting the giants like Knowth and Newgrange, because they are… well, they’re Newgrange and Knowth and it would be incredibly pretentious to claim any level of knowledge)
But I’ll probably discover that I’m wrong.
OK, I got one for you. What would posess a traffic engineer to design an intersection for a four-lane road (two lanes in either direction) WITHOUT A DAMN RIGHT-TURN LANE?
There aren’t right turn lanes at the majority of four lane intersections. They’ll only consider one if there are significant amounts of right turning traffic that negatively impacts the over all traffic flow.
I am the world’s only expert on my own opinion.
Seriously, to paraphrase, I’m a jack of many trades, master of none. I learn far more here, than I contribute.
I am one of a few folks here who collect first edition books - I know a ton about American Lit firsts of the 20th century, but won’t claim superiority.
Same with guitar - there are plenty of players here - but I have invested a ton of time in electric guitars and amps and know quite a bit about why the good ones sound and play well vs. others (ask **Crotalus ** - he and I talk shop). Same with general music knowledge, playing in a band, etc…
So does that mean we keep our insurance interpretation disputes out of public view? (maybe they covered that in the section of CPCU that I didn’t finish)
I really haven’t been around SDMB long enough to declare myself grandmaster of a field. I’m sure one will surface though.
Is there anyone else here who speaks any Ojibwe? I am really crappy at it now, but if there aren’t any other Anishnaube-speakers around I might be the resident expert.
I’m all over any discussion of English female costume history.
Besides that, I’m not really expert in anything.
The one subject where I completely confident is celestial dynamics. I think I’m one of the more knowledgable about planetary astronomy, too. And I’m definitely a contender for “biggest tea geek,” though there are a few more Doper connoisseurs.
I am grateful to fellow Dopers from whom I have much to learn about other subjects dear to my heart, like knitting, cooking, teaching, non-planetary astronomy, pseudoscience, and, oh, about a dozen other topics.
And despite the handle, I do not hold a candle to the serious Heinlein scholars on the board.
I guess film and television technology, and to a lesser extent, still photography. It’s my life, and being immersed in the minutae kind of makes me insistent about my details.
Otherwise? Why, I’m a know it all- that’s why I’m here.
Like the rest of us !!
( except for Guin, who’s just here to pad her post count… D&R )
( joking, joking… )
Cartooniverse
tremorviolet, I am probably the most famous non-national-team coxswain there is.
That ought to give you enough. 
ponder I have a pretty good grasp of English that I’ve parlayed into a career, but it’s all gut instinct. Dangling participle? Serial commas? Past pluperfect? The brain, she has nothing.
**ArrMatey! ** – what mythologies do you focus on? I think I’ve got a handle on a good few, and I’m curious to see if your list is like mine.
I know a lot about oldschool and indie games, the SNES classics, roguelikes, interactive fiction and all the good stuff. I may have misspent my youth, but at least I did it with more style than the CS-playing riff-raff. This is about the only area I can claim any authority on.
I also know astonishing amounts about rare genetic diseases and just about every sexual fetish on the net. The former comes from a natural interest, the latter just from spending too much time on the internet. But these two are more fact lists than actual knowledge.
About most other subjects, I know just enough to be completely useless. Oh well.
I know car financing. I write programs that deal with it for a living. This being my major skill gives me insight into Aquaman’s psyche.
In every day life my answer would normally be Star Trek and while I consider myself one of the experts here, I’m pretty well matched by quite a few and far outstripped by others like Sir Rhosis. The only thing I could think of that I might be able to claim having more knowledge than anyone else on the SDMB is WCW, the chief competition of WWF/E from 1986 to its bankruptcy in 2001, but that is only because professional wrestling isn’t particularly embraced here.