Everything I know about good safety practices I learned in elementary school from Jiminy Cricket! There was a whole series of “I’m No Fool” cartoons.
Agree with the general consensus above. It’s about motivation and the “tattler’s” perception of safety.
If something is a clear and present danger, then I don’t interrogate, I say, “thanks, that’s a problem,” and go deal with it.
If I suspect we’re feeling whiny and frustrated but there’s no bodily harm or property damage likely to ensue, I ask the teller, “So, what do you think might happen?” or “What are you worried about?” If they can’t come up with anything, I’ll say, “Well, then I guess we don’t need to worry.” If they do have an outlandish concern, that’s an indication that they need some attention, and I’ll give it to them, in the form of talking about likelier outcomes. I feel like this helps them learn to predict and plan, important skills to have.
If it’s clearly nastiness, I’ll suggest that they find something else to do for a bit to cool off, or go back and sort it out themselves.
Blood, fire or vomit is a pretty good rubric, actually. I’ve been known to ask with an astonished enthusiasm, “ERMAHGERD! Is his bone poking out? Did his butt fall off?” and when the kid giggles, it breaks the dramarama. Then I feign disappointment that his butt didn’t fall off and send the kid back to play.
This is another reason why I don’t have children. Morals be damned, I know that if I had two kids, I’d be bribing both of them massively to inform on each other. I’m thinking I would need all the allies that I could get.
“Mooooooom! Bro has hit me!”
“Did you hit him first?”
“Yes!”
“What are you complaining about, then?”
“MOM! Bro’s nose is bleeding!”
grownups split between going for the bandages and going to check actual damage
That was a difference my particular tribe of kids learned pretty fast; we got desirable results for reporting, but not for tattling.
Anybody remember the “Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids” show?
We used to watch that as kids and now a local channel is re-running them in the afternoon. I checked it out.
First: Goddamn these were bad.
Second: One episode was about a runaway who got mixed up with some “bad cats”. :rolleyes: The gang got wind of something bad about to go down. Fat Albert goes off to save the day…
And Old Weird Harold shows up the* Cops!*
My wife and I immediately blurt out, “Old Weird Harold is a fucking Snitch!” :eek:
Riley would never go to the Po-Po. Yeaaaaah, Grand-dad!
It’s an annoying character flaw to enjoy getting others in trouble; but the “don’t snitch” rule seems to be developed to protect law-breakers. Some neighborhoods won’t tell the police anything even if a dozen saw a murder - solidarity with the community outranks “he murdered my friend”? My father had a business that “required” a commercial license. Once he went to authorities when it was reported he had the only license in the county. He told them he could name five others, but would not give the names. I thought it was a little illogical.
I wanted to mention this as well. That attitude boggles my mind - especially as the residents complain, in the same breath, that the cops don’t care, that they never solve ‘neighborhood’ crimes. How do you expect them to solve it? magic?
I’m glad I’m not a detective in those areas - I’d be sorely tempted to round file the whole investigation. If they don’t care, why should it? I’ll go solve a murder where people care about justice.