Thanks for all the replies. I agree with the general consensus that face-to-face is probably better. I shall just have to get over my irrational fear that he will mock me, slam the door in my face and get even louder.
Thanks for the frank impressions of my note. On further analysis, it does seem too long. I’ve found that I tend to be very wordy in print: All those academic papers with required lengths, perhaps? The last thing I wish to do is put him on the defensive, so I shall ditch the note.
Chris Luongo, I wish we classicists ran the world. My job prospects would be much better
Oh, and World Eater, one drawback to your approach is that I am sure he just doesn’t realize how much I can hear, as he isn’t playing anything very loud in volume (the wall is just paper-thin) and he doesn’t, as far as I can tell, do it too late into the night. As he’s not being a jerk, I don’t feel I should escalate by being one back. I already pounded on the wall, once, and felt like a real bitch afterwards.
Also, our apartments are right next to each other and completely isolated from any other units, so the only people he could really be bothering are me and maybe the folks upstairs, so I don’t really have a lot of backup on this.
I am definitely okay with some noise, and I have bought some earplugs already, but there are times when I want to listen to my own noise, like my music, and his conflicts with it. Earplugs don’t help there.
I’m trying not to hijack this, but it seems like it might apply…
Assuming you weren’t exaggerating about the common wall thickness being 2 inches, I’d look into that and see if thats up to code. IIRC from some classes I took, the standard wall thickness, if the code is the same in Boston, is 5 inches. This is ignoring stuff like insulation, etc. that would apply as well to sound absorption and isolation. (And which ALSO might be regulated by code?) If, indeed, the wall is illegally thin or improperly insulated, perhaps attention could be called to it and the proper repairs made? Just a thought; I know your nose is on the grindstone there, might be a little time consuming…
If, on the other hand, you WERE exaggerating, that’s a terrific analogy. He really ought to use headphones, anyway…
Melandry, I sympathize in a really heartfelt way. While I was simultaneously trying to work full-time and finish my thesis, I had an upstairs neighbor who both a) worked the night shift, meaning he usually got home at 3 am and thought nothing of blasting some really loud, profane rap, to the extent that my floor shook and you could hear it down the block; and b) after my numerous and very polite requests to have some consideration for the fact that I either had to be out of the house for work by 7:30 am or working on my thesis, on those occasions when I took the day off, he just didn’t give a damn, and told me that he didn’t care, because he paid rent and therefore, had the right to enjoy his apartment, too. In retrospect, I should’ve called the damn cops on him; he had waaaaay too many chances.
A couple of points for all:
Nowehere in the OP does it say that the guitar is electric.
With all due respect to Taco Bell employees (and I’ve paid my share of dues in the retail/fast food realm, both before and during grad school), sleep deprivation is going to have a much greater effect, proportionately, on the cognitive abilities needed to research and write a dissertation than on those required to make change for a $10 bill.
That said, everyone deserves to be able to sleep. Check out your city’s noise ordinance; it may differentiate between acceptable noise levels, depending on the hour.
The idea of negotiating schedules is also a good one. Your meighbor may truly not have any idea how much he bothers you (and he does have the right to play music, too), so until he shows his ill will, give him the benefit of the doubt and try to negotiate a mutually acceptable solution.
Good luck, both with the neighbor and the dissertation!
Based on the kind of guy (educated, not yet adjusted to living amongst others,) Get a collection from your neighbors, who are no doubt equally thrilled.
With the loot, buy the guitar playing oaf a box full of egg-cartons (soundproofing gold), and a book on how to best install them, with a note that says “Good luck on your Guitar Playing Career, from your neighbors in Apts #2D, 3D, 5A,” as needed.
Next time you see him, joke about it, and with the ice broken, make the rest of your suggestions as needed.
You know, the note isn’t half as condecending and obnoxious if you only include the first and final paragraphs. I’d still reword them a bit, though.
Actually, I’d go talk to him. If its low level stuff (tv, music…but not to the point that its moving anythying in our aptmt) during normal hours (8am-10pm ish.) then he’s pretty much within his rights to tell you to shove it and get to a library. Mid level, again during normal hours (you mentioned that his music overpowered yours) I’d go and knock on his door and ask him to turn it down a touch. (Hey, guy, If I wanted to watch Friends I’d have it on rather than Chopin.) High level noise or persistant noise with no attempt to respect your activities outside of normal hours (3 am.) is a two warnings then management then cops deal.
I know how frusterating this is, I lived in a college dorm where the RA was best friends with the girl next door. The girl next door evidentally slept only while I was in class and liked to throw large drunken parties when I had an 8am exam the next morning. Which the RA would attend and I would have to break up. Its an interesting experiance at 19 to feel like the evil stepmother of an entire floor, including the 24 year old RA. If loud boy next door doesn’t respond to civil niceties within the next month or so, drop me an e-mail, I have many, many ideas for the next stage of negotiation.
