Yeah, but we know it’s 'cause they all SUCK compared to AMERICA.
Duh.
I think that’s because most of us have figured it out by the time we’re 13. I know it was a shock to me when I found out that there were, in fact, people living outside of America who weren’t desperate to get into our country. That’s just how we’re brought up to think in this culture. (Maybe not so much in the W era, though.) Myself, I was born into a military family, so I got that message twice over.
Almost all American men I’ve met have been way too friendly for comfort, both physically and verbally. Physically, they stand or sit too close (The Swedish comfort zone seems to be much bigger). Verbally, it’s the constant compliments: “You look beautiful today!” or “That is a lovely dress” (I know it sounds lame, but I couldn’t think of any better examples).
Now… in Sweden, a guy only does this if he wants to give you the sexy, and even then it’s considered a bit embarrassing. To get this from someone’s American boyfriend or relative feels very awkward.
I’ve talked about it with a couple of American guys who have been in Scandinavia for an extended time. They both said that there was usually no intention of hitting on anyone, but that they were just being friendly and polite. They had heard the same complaint from several Scandinavian friends, and learned to act accordingly.
So, in short: All American guys seem like they’re hitting on you, but don’t let it get to your head. They’re just being polite.
Heh - from the other side of the coin, I was surprised to find out that Americans thought that way. Why on earth would I want to be American? I’m living in a perfectly fine country already! 
No you’re not. You pay way too much for universal health care, your moral fiber is corrupted by rampant liberalism, and secretly, deep within the blackest depths of your soul, you can’t stand hockey. 
I studied Italian and spent several months there this year. I’m hardly an expert, but I would say that Italians need something more specific to distinguish between work and hobby. “What do you do?” Translated directly “Che fa?” or “Cosa fa?” might mean “what are you doing?” (i.e. right now). If you want to know what sort of work someone does you’d say “che lavoro fa?” I’m actually not sure how you’d ask about hobbies, but the Italian word for “hobby” is “hobby”.
I think there is a difference in the language that helps cause this difference in answers, though I hesitate to try to pin it down with my limited knowledge.
No, we’re hitting on you, just embarrassed that it’s that obvious, so we cover by saying it’s not.
Either that, which opens up a whole can of worms, or you haven’t seen what passes for “hitting on someone” over here.
In one of my American Sign Language classes, the teacher distinguished between Deaf goodbyes & hearing goodbyes. From his POV, Deaf goodbyes were a lot like the conversation you typed above and would go on and on forever and ever, while hearing goodbyes seemed to be just “bye,” “see ya,” and over.
According to him, it had to do with there being a certain level of isolation (I may be overstating it) for a Deaf person in a hearing world - so there is a reluctance to actually leave someone with whom you communicate with easily and go back into a space where that communication isn’t as available, so “goodbye” tends to last forever. Assuming that there’s something to what he said, could it be possible that ex-pats in Indonesia might feel that same sort of isolation?
I think one reason why so many Americans answer “where are you from” with their state is that there really is no good way to say you are from the USA.
The answer “The United States” sounds too formal, and too unspecific (after all, Mexico is also a “United States”), but “America” sounds a bit childish and jingoistic. I always say “America”, but I cringe a bit whenever I say it. It makes me feel like I’m back in grade school or something.
I guess as adults we are used to thinking of our country as the US- we think about US politics, etc. But that’s not something you can use as an answer in this situation.
And that’s what makes the ethnic identification so offensive to some. You haven’t shared their culture or their struggles, you are not part of a living, breathing culture. You are descended from those that left, and your only connection is to a dead historical portion of the culture.
Ethnically valid, you can claim heritage, but not identity. And it’s the desperation that makes it like spitting in their face. Like it or not, being raised American is what you are.
Now, as to the existence of an American identity: Broadly, I believe you can say there is one, in that we generally eschew formalism and have an ingrained cultural abhorrence of all things aristocratic- that is, most of us. That means “pretension” and “arrogance” are two of the most socially cutting characteristics you can label most Americans.
However, and this is something most Europeans don’t seem to grasp (and most Americans that don’t travel within their country as well), the US has several regions that are culturally distinct to a fairly high degree. Not to the level of, say, Germany and France- but northern and southern Italy, say.
Roughly: New England, the South, the “middle South” (Virginia, Penn, West Virg, etc.), the Great Lakes region, Texas, the Cornbelt, the northern mountain states, the southwest, Appalachia, California, Alaska, Hawaii, and the Northwest. A number of states would need splitting- for instance, Penn would need to be chopped up, and a chunk of northern CA would join the NW while the southern portion would claim hunks of Nevada and Arizona, etc.- but in general, those areas are fairly distinctive, culturally- and by extension, fairly culturally cohesive internally.
I think the reason we’re seeing some different, and generally broad, responses is that our European cousins are trying to describe “what Nordic peoples are like” instead of realizing that their sample sets would be better arranged as Danes vs. Scandanavians at the minimum.
As to the cohesiveness of Canada: I ask our Canadian posters to be honest, aside from the quebecois, is or is not Canadian culture fairly homogeneous compared to other similarly sized regions (like the US or Brazil)? Quebec is a highly distinct region in Canada, but do people from Toronto differ so strongly from people in British Vancouver or Nova Scotia?
You probably just don’t see the differences, the way a visitor to the US might not see the differences that you’re talking about.
I live fairly close to Vancouver, B.C., which means I meet quite a few Canadians from across the nation- and I asked because, aside from the distinct Francophone region, the differences seem no larger to me than those between people from Washington and Idaho. There are some, but they’re not culturally distinctive- there’s a larger definitive Canadian identity I see that’s stronger than regional distinctions. Mind, I don’t know for certain, which is why I asked- and a dismissive answer presuming no exposure is not the best way to go.
Newfoundland has a very distinct identity inside of Canada. Other than that, there are noticeable differences. The Maritimes are oriented toward the sea, and I believe that Nova Scotia at least has a large population of Scottish heritage who consider that to be an important part of their identity. The Prairies have a large population of people of German or Eastern European extraction. Alberta is more conservative and individualistic than most other provinces. British Columbia, being on the Pacific coast of Canada, sees its history differently as the provinces on the East. But I’m sure someone who’s lived in several places in Canada could give a better answer than me.
I’ll take your ‘Maryland’ and raise you ‘Leicestershire’, ‘Gloucestershire’ and, indeed, ‘Marylebone’. We all have weird local pronunciations we can use to take the piss out of johnny foreigner.
And don’t forget to try the Worcestershire Sauce (that’s ‘Wooster’, of course).
(quoted a couple times already by American posters who don’t grok it)
I already mentioned the “physical distance vs acceptable distance” thing, but please note the underlined part. I was talking about the same group of Americans standing closer to me when we were in the USA than when we were in Europe or Latin America. Being huggier, more likely to give a backslap (at least Americans don’t give buttslaps to women, although you should have seen the work in the German’s face when he got one), more in your face. Everybody behaves somewhat differently “at home” and “abroad,” this is one point in which I noticed the diference for American coworkers - again, for the behaviour of the same people in two different places.
One of my mother’s very-much-Spanish friends does the eternal-goodbyes thing, too. I’m never sure whether she wants to make sure everything that needed to be said, has, or that since she talks so much and takes so long for anything, most people avoid talking to her. I’m not planning on asking her!
(over limit)
**Kyla, ** in Spanish “¿qué haces?” (lit “what do you do?”) is equivalent to “¿qué estas haciendo?,” that is, “what are you doing (right now)?” For job/profession, it’s “¿a qué te dedicas?” (uhm, how do you translate dedicarse…) or “¿en qué trabajas?” (“what is your work/job?”). So, another language in the region where “do” and “work” are different questions.
(happily) Oh, we always spent a week vacationing in Eureka Springs in the summer, when I was growing up. Do you know Tablerock Lake?
This is a good point – presumably Italian men are less likely to pinch women while traveling in other countries, for instance. 
It may have a flip side, too. It may be that a person is more sensitized to the issue while away from home. When in a foreign country, one might be a bit more guarded and aware of his or her surroundings, because of the unfamiliarity, the lack of feeling at home. In such a situation, a person standing the same distance away might be more noticeable and more of an imposition when one is in the foreign country than if one were at home.
I would say the distinct regions in Canada are the Maritimes, Quebec, Greater Toronto Area, other Ontario, the Prairies, BC, and the north. I would say we are more homogeneous than the contiguous US, except for Quebec, but we definitely have distinct regions.