Right – what’s one more human being walking around, right? I care if distraught people are attempting to off themselves out of black despair. It concerns me and distresses me – almost as much as I am concerned and distressed by proof, here and elsewhere, that some people truly do not give a shit about their fellow men and women.
Damn that suicidal woman for being inconsiderate enough to back me up in traffic! Sure, she was trying to work up the courage to either end her life or face it, while I was merely made late for work but . . . my life is more important than hers, no matter how profound her crisis!
I think the best evidence that the woman didn’t hope to be talked out of it is the fact she jumped. That she was dead serious in her attempt therefore appears to be incontestable. That she was persuaded not to make the attempt for three hours by caring people who sought to sway her from her chosen course speaks volumes, and positively, about the willingness of society to extend its hand to those who need it.
This is counter-balanced, of course, by ignorant assholess who cannot be inconvenienced, not even by the most profound of crises – unless the crises involve them, of course – and who are not above egging a person on to kill herself rather than cool their heels. Fortunately, the assholes aren’t in charge.
We put glass booths on the occasional street corner. Inside these booths will be two buttons. One marked “death” and the other marked “help”.
If they want to be talked out of it, all they have to do it push a button and someone will try their damnedest. If they really want to die (which is a perfectly acceptable choice, in my opinion), they push the other one.
Since the booth is glass, caring strangers can see the choice about to be made and gnash their teeth, wring their hands, and cry out to the heavens to their heart’s content. Who knows, maybe such strangers will be able to convince a few despondent people to change their minds.
Your own life is your most precious possession; if you want to end it, that is a valid personal decision. (Even if it is for so stupid a reason as breaking up with a boyfriend.)
Were the people on the bridge wrong to shout out what they did? Horrifically.
Were the police and other services right to try and change her mind? Aboslutely.
Was the woman inconsiderate? Completely. I don’t see why it is so bothersome to have such an obvious fact pointed out.
It’s bothersome because the entire concept of ‘consideration for others’ obviously flies out the window when you’re dealing with a person in such emotional distress that she’s trying to kill herself. The very idea that her chief concern (or indeed any of her concerns) should be whether or not she’s inconveniencing others is IMO ridiculous. The very idea that anyone would expect her to think in such terms at such a time is IMO unrealistic and heartless. It is further bothersome because it accurately reflects that those who carp about her lack of ‘consideration’ are far more concerned with how her actions affected them than with how they affected her – even though she risked losing her life when they only risked being late for work.
If you want to die, you get a gun, stick it in your mouth. You get a rope, hang from the rafters. You get in your car, close the garge door, and turn on the engine. You stick your head in a gas oven and wait for sleep. You sit in a bathtub full of warm water, slit your wrists.
If you want people to think your life is horrible enough to end, and you want attention, you climb a building or bridge and wait. You take a bunch of pills and call someone to tell them you did so.
There is a big difference between a suicide and an “attempted suicide”. If she wanted her life to end, she would have done so quietly; there are many ways to do so. People who act in the way this woman did are despondent, and want people in the world to know how horrible things are for them.
I have dealt with many people who attempted suicide, or at least wanted to. This woman was acting in a selfish manner, but I am sure her mindset was one of despair, and the thought of screwing up everyone’s day wasn’t entering her head. She was looking for attention, and she received it. Of course the reaction of the people was not what she anticipated, and she unfortunately ended her life.
I’m totally at a loss to imagine how anyone could argue that this woman didn’t want to kill herself. Regardless of whether you attempt and succeed or attempt and fail, you obviously intend it so long as you attempt it for real.
Or are you arguing that this woman jumped the equivalent of 16 stories and didn’t really expect to die? That she somehow thought she’d survive? The very idea that anyone would think this was chiefly an attention-getting ploy just floors me. I mean, you might make that argument if she hadn’t jumped and her intent therefore remained unclear. But she DID jump and her intent cannot be questioned.
Obviously her attempt was serious. I’ve been on the receiving end of a couple attention-getting “attempts” and jumping from a bridge is much more final that most pseudo-attempts I’ve heard of.
[The only loophole I can see is that she did mostly want the attention and then once she saw the fuss decided she had no choice but to follow through; but I don’t think that is likely]
I’m not saying I expect consideration from the distraugt, but that doesn’t negate the inconsideration she showed. I would prefer that those committed to suicide would think out their act so as to minimize pain, trauma, and suffering of others. That is my preference, not my expectation.
OB, the fact remains that to discuss the level of consideration you “would like to see” from the suicidal will strike many as heartless in the extreme. It does me; no two ways about it. Your thoughts are with the people being merely inconvenienced, not the person whose very life literally hangs in the balance. I find those priorities both telling and dismaying.
If I believe that people have the right to select suicide, why would it bother me that some choose to exercise that right? I honestly have no idea why my thoughts should be with her? I don’t expect her thoughts to be with me as I make my life decisions every day.
I don’t find it sad when someone commits suicide, though I may find it misguided. My thoughts also aren’t with the people expressing anger at their inconvenience. Those who called out to her were beyond reprehensible. I personally would not have felt any great inconvenience had I been stuck in the traffic. You may find this hard to believe, but I am one of the most patient traffic sitters you will ever meet. I have things I can accomplish while in the car, and missed appointment can be rescheduled and later flights can be caught.
I respect what the police had to do and in no way criticize them closing the freeway. If my thoughts are with anybody, it is with the police and firemen that had to deal with it.
No. She was not simply being selfish. I’m sure she was genuinely distraught as well. Never did I suggest the emergency crew should ignore her.
What I’m saying is: even if you are depressed enough to consider ending your own life, it is a selfish act to do so in such a way to endanger others. I don’t see why this need be considered a callous statement. Would you suggest that once you reach a particular level of depression, everyone else’s safety and welfare need no longer be considered?
WAVERLY, the woman didn’t endanger anyone else. She inconvenienced people by backing up traffic. No one was dangling over the bridge trying to retreive her. For that matter, the police initially only shut down half the bridge and attempted to funnel traffic around her. This resulted in traffic being backed up almost to a stand-still, and frustrated drivers yelling “jump, bitch, jump!” It was only then, and in light of that behavior, that the police shut the whole bridge down, resulting in a full-on traffic cluster-fuck. At which point, my response to the inconvenience is a shrug. Late for work? Too fucking bad. This was more important. And you had half a chance to actually get there until some of your fellow-citizen assholes screwed it up by yelling at at the woman.
This is a far different situation IMO than one where a suicidal person endangers others. That’s just not what happened here.
And OB, the obvious difference is that attempting suicide is not a regular, routine day-to-day decision. You either see that or you don’t.
Yet again, you vomit up more proof that you are one cold-hearted sob without an ounce of compassion and that you know nothing about mental illness, depression or human emotions.
You don’t understand-often times, people want BOTH-death and to be talked out of it. They are confused, distraught, and generally too far gone to be thinking rationally. The survival instinct in humans goes very deep-in my mind, to actually try to kill oneself shows supreme desperation. It’s often a CRY for help-and when people like you make your cunthole remarks, they ignore the ONE cry for help that might have prevented a tragedy.
And while yes, suicide can be described as somewhat selfish-it is not a traditional selfish, but rather caused by such extreme pain that you’re not going to care about anything else.
Fuck you, all of you dirty snatchwipes who only care about getting your ass to your fucking job where you can fellate your boss’s ego so that you can buy your solid gold dildo. Fuck you. Fuck you up the ass sideways with a rusty meathook.
An ambulance or fire truck could have made it through. The police were blocking off the highway to regular traffic. If an emergency vehicle had needed to traverse the freeway, I can think of no earthly reason why the police would not have allowed that vehicle through the barriers.
Something about a few of the comments being made here bothers me.
Depression, even black suicidal depression, does not mean that you are crazy, and totally unable to appreciate the consequences of your actions on those around you…even if your attempt(s) at self-destruction have an element of irrationality.
In most circumstances, potential suicides can appreciate that there may be a callous air to a attempt that places others in jeopardy. This case placed police and emergency workers at potential risk (what if she’d latched onto someone trying to hold her back from the brink?). That said, none of us know exactly what was going on in her head, how out of control she was, and just what constituted her mental state. I don’t have the right to judge her, certainly none of those morons whose commute was delayed have the right to scream at her, and the letter writer cited in the OP is a flaming shit-for-brains.
This past week a woman in my area wound up in the hospital critically injured after her disabled car was rammed at high speed by another driver. This driver was observed talking on a cell phone, weaving repeatedly on and off the road, and finally rear-ending the other car on the shoulder (well off the road). It turns out that the driver who caused the accident had recently had a child die in an accident, and was reportedly very upset and depressed at the time of the crash.
Was she inconsiderate, or too distraught to be thought criminally liable for her actions?
This could be true, I was not there so I don’t know… but are you certain that it is true? Granted the police would have wanted to speed emergency vehicles through, however traffic was presumably snarled for miles. This may not have been possible.
Don’t forget, she was rescued by a police diver. Water rescues are never routine, and always have an element of danger. Why can we not empathize with this woman’s pain but at the same time condemn her actions as selfish?
Listen up, you obtuse piece of shit. How many times do I have to say that I don’t have a problem with the police trying to talk her out of it, I don’t have a problem with her making a scene if that is where her distress took her, the people who shouted out to her were reprehensible. She was still fucking inconsiderate. As I said, I don’t expect consideration, but I do hope for it.
No, my heart doesn’t bleed with pity because some woman I don’t know couldn’t handle the stress of a break-up with her boyfriend. And frankly, if yours does, then I suspect that it has less to do with real compassion than a desire to make yourself feel superior through you supposed greater capacity for compassion.
Thank you, though, for your humorous, if inaccurate, predictions on what I know and what I’ve experienced. I’ve lived through the suicides of three friends and one relative. I’ve come by my thoughts on suicide honestly, and if you can’t accept that a reasonable person can come to a different conclusion than you, then go fuck yourself.
Oh, yes, she’s inconsiderate, because she has a problem, and prevents you from getting to where you want to go quicker. Fuck you. If having to drive a little bit out of your way is the worst thing that happens to you, you’re lucky.
I hope you never have a problem in life where you need compassion. Because you’ll learn pretty damn quick that it’s not so black and white as you paint it.
No, my sense of compassion and the reason my heart bleeds is that, if she WAS crying out for help, people callously and selfishly only thought of themselves.
So WHAT if she may have been inconsiderate-she should just do it and get it over with?
Oh yes, the whole-yes, I know people like that, I’ve been there, blah blah blah…smacks of “some of my best friends are…”
Go screw.
Very well said Cervaise. Why don’t you mail the creep the letter?
Waverly wrote:
Why would an emergency vehicle remain in a miles-long traffic jam instead of going off and finding an alternate route? Do they lack radio communication and off-ramps in Washington or is there just one very long highway that leads everywhere?
I am not claiming that my experience gives my position any added validity. It was just a response to your claim that I have no experience.
I’m not sure what you consider to be my “cunthole remarks” (though I’m surprised that you seem to view cuntholes as a bad thing; I find them glorious). As I’ve said too many times so far, I would never had cried out for her to jump.
Perhaps, my “cunthole remark” was that I don’t care if she commits suicide. As I’ve also said too many times, you have the right select suicide. It is your life, use it as you please. In my opinion, suicide is not a tragedy, it is a choice. I would never encourage someone to commit suicide, but it is their choice and I would never interfere with it. If they want to talk to me about it, that is fine and I will happily give them reasons to choose life, but if they decide to do it anyway, I’ll leave them be.
I can, though, accept that others have a different view; I’m sorry that you can’t accept that and that my view warrants cramming a rusty meathook up my ass.
Tony: They were on a very long bridge with minimal shoulders. It would be very difficult for an emergency vehicle to move through completely stopped traffic. However, the obvious solution would be to just come from the other end of the bridge going the wrong way.