Now that Elon Musk has bought Twitter - now the Pit edition (Part 1)

So, add “creepy creeper who creeps” to Elmo’s impressive portfolio.

He just keeps getting better and better.

I don’t think Elmo is all that interested in Taylor Swift. Having never tried to float down the Mississippi in a homemade houseboat with a flock of chickens like Zelda Xox, aka Grimes, she lacks that space-cadet mental derangement that Elmo so values. Also, no Xs in her name.

I had never heard the T-Swizzle reference, but maybe Xwizzle?

He just wants her legion of fans. I don’t think he’s necessarily hitting on her.

But I’ve been wrong before.

She’s tall, blonde, and intelligent. Ideal breeding stock for Elmo’s all-white Martian utopia.

She has a lot of social status, and that’s what he craves endlessly.

Right up until the first half white half green kid.

Is he just trying to make money off her?

Yes. And a not-small amount of Twitter users would actually subscribe for this content.

This is not the first time Elmo has done this. If he had any self-awareness, he’d realize that he’s now become a cheap shill, spamming celebrities to get them to contribute more content to his dumpster-fire platform. All while announcing that he’s soon going to start charging them for the privilege. The man is nothing less than an agile genius!

Doper please…

If he’s anyone he’s Hugo Drax, a eugenicist who owns his own rocket company, loves video games, and fancies himself the savior of mankind by taking the “best of us” off planet while he fucks over everyone else.

Drax’s plans were mostly successful, though. Elmo’s really more of a Hugo Farnsworth without the charisma or likeability.

In other news, Elmo is done killing monkeys with his neural implants and is ready to start killing human beings now.

Yes, I’ve seen Musk do this a few times. Last week it was Bill Maher. He tries to persuade celebrities to publish stuff on X/Twitter rather than their usual platforms. He holds up Tucker Carlson as an example of someone who uses X as their main distribution outlet, except Musk lies by conflating impressions - the number of times a tweet is seen - with actual video views. It comes across as a bit desperate to me.

Lament the loss of any future episodes of If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device, victim of GW’s lawyer’s ‘zealous’ plans to prevent any competition to the launch the garbage fire that is Warhammer+ protect their IP.

This made me choke up a bit for a second. Those poor things. What an indecent way to treat living breathing creatures.

i.e. They didn’t even get something as simple as securely screwing a part into place right, never mind hard stuff like interfacing neurons to electronics.

Some animals are more human than some humans.

This is some Unit 731 shit.

Anyone volunteering to be a human test subject for this insanity needs their head examined. By an actual psychiatrist, not Musk’s butchers.

WARNING! Do not click on the link for Unit 731 if you want to sleep at night! Jesus, man; put that in spoiler tags.