So 75% of my friends worked at Six Flags this summer. This means that I went a lot, and just to see them because I HATE most rollercoasters. The only kind I go on are the rickety ol’ wooden ones that clank like it’s going to collapse in a heap in the next 2 seconds. I don’t get queasy or anything, it’s just that the prospect of going upside-down and in 4 spirals and over 7 turns in a matter of 10 seconds doesn’t really appeal to me. Like…I’d rather make out with Ryan Seacrest after he barfed up clam chowder.
So what’s a girl who hates most rollercoasters to do in SIX FLAGS?
Why, play games, of course.
Sadly, there are like 40 games at Six Flags, and the only one I’m good at is Whac-A-Mole. But I did not want to accept this. So I go up to Ring Toss and I think, “Pfft, this looks ridiculously easy, let’s do it. I could really use a six-foot neon purple stuffed gorilla.”
So I do it, and I lose, and of course it costs two bucks. So I think, “Well, let’s just try this one more time, because I’m sure that was just a bad throw.”
So I do it again.
And I lose!!
A normal person would quit now. Not me, I just move on to six more games of the same pattern, take a nacho break, play two more games, go on the old rickety rollercoaster and the Spinny-Rides, and go home with 3 dollars, two 4-foot Bugs Bunny plushes, a small furry Yosemite Sam, a giant tub of Cotton Candy, and no dignity.
If I ever go to Vegas again (we went once when I was 8), and I’m of legal age, I’m going to need someone to drag me away from the casinos.
It’s a good strategy on the marketing side, though.