Odd Places to Find a Penis

Some friends and I decided to spend last night in a car, so we parked it behind a baseball field. One of the topics of conversation was “What are some off places to find a penis?” The penis was just that, nothing but a penis, no body or anything attached to it.

Some of the more funnier places were:

In a paint can
A woman wakes up in the morning and finds it lodged in her vagina.
Between the pages of a French Dictionary.
In the jar of pickles at the movie theater.
On a shelf with other trophies.

True story:

On a cash register in a Thai restaurant.

Under the cushions of the couch…?

As a Christmas tree ornament
In a vending machine
As a light bulb

Bobbing like a little buoy in your morning coffee.

I think a dismembered penis is pretty weird no matter where you find it.

Also, in a mailbox.

Between Andrea Dworkin’s thighs.

Flying from a flagpole.

On your forehead
In your shoe
In the place where you normally keep your toothbrush

In the toaster
As the prize in a box of cereal
In line at the DMV

This one’s great, LittleBird!

Running for political office. Oh, wait. Maybe that’s not such an odd place… :wink:

Hey, in all fairness, I only left it there as a placeholder while I ran to get a soda. What else was I supposed to use?

Live from Hollywood…

As Attorney General…

hey, waitaminute.


“No, I will not eat green balls and dick
What the hell are you, Sam, sick?”

Now with 30% more Penis!

On the moon under the flag planted by the Apollo 12 crew.
Portmerion, Wales
Inside my DVD player.
The wood storage room in my old High School theatre building.*
*I once found a 38D jogging bra in there once. Really.

The OP was odd places. A WOOD storage room - come on…

Taped to a dickless workstation.*

*Dickless workstation: (n., perjor.) A computer with no hard disk.

Now the dickless workstation has a Wang.

But not a godly Wang.

Mr. Bobbit

In Ellen Degeneres’ house