I swear the MMP is just populated with pervs! I knew there was a reason I like hanging out here.
chaoticdonkey there are all kinds of Santas. The ones we are talking about are specialty Santas for adults. They don’t need no stinkin’ (and that is literal, if you’ve ever been in one of those things you’d know) fake red velvet Santa suits. VunderBob the gourmet doggie food sounds good. I’m glad to know you don’t take doggie’s bowl away from her so you can eat it.
<snerk>“You’ve beaten anorexia.”<snerk>
-swampbear (who has played kiddie Santa a few times and loved it)
I just recently stopped making homemade food for the Anachi doggies. My recipe was similar to bob’s except I used chicken instead of beef. Do you use brown rice? Oh, and I used most veggies except corn since it’s got a pretty high allergy ratio for doggies. Anyway, I had to give it up because my geezer dog wasn’t digesting it very well anymore. I used to munch on it too when I was preparing it for the dogs…BEFORE it went in their bowls. Now they eat a very good kibble with no corn filler or meat by-products. Ya’ll know what by-products are don’tcha? Nasty stuff like feathers, beaks and ah*s. :eek: That’s the kinda stuff that oogies me out. All the dogs have adjusted well except for Jade, the Prima Donna Pug[sup]TM[/sup], who sit’s by her bowl and turns up her nose until I stand there and make noises like I’m gonna eat her stuff. Then she gets all growly and decides she better eat it before I do.
Tupug (Not an old crackpot with 20 dogs running around…yet)
My Mom’s dog gets spoon-fed. She thinks the poor wittle lapdog (Australian Shepherd/Weimeraner cross) will starve if his mummy doesn’t feed him. He also gets cookies, ice cream, and hamburgers. Yes, he is fat. Yes, he has his own cookie tin.
I’m glad Mom doesn’t have a real small dog. The big one gets smothered enough.
I am, as I type, listening in on a conference call with our national office. Wanna know stuff about HIPAA? No? Me neither, but I gotta listen to this. Of course, my entire office will eventually suffer for this because I will have to create some more of THE EVIL.[sup]TM[/sup] BWAHAHAHAHA!!!
Heehee, she’s asking: “Do you want me to go over the standards in detail or just go over the risk assessment part.” I wanna answer: “Whichever’s shorter!” but I’m not that much of a meany. We’re going over the risk assessment. If you hear snoring, that’ll be me.
Not to mentioned bored outta my skull! Dear Og, is there no end to this!
I need me a quintessential frozen treat! Or a beer. Maybe both. I think I want a 'nanner sammich for lunch. I’m hungry.
I wish they’d just put this stuff on the intranet and let me go read what I need to know. sigh Somebody’s asking a question. Some ol’ smarty pants trying to make us believe she’s actually paying attention. She’s on the fifth step! I didn’t even hear the fourth. Now, she’s coughing up a lung. EWWW!!! :eek:
I think the term you were looking for was “quiescently frozen treat”. I wonder if one can quiescently freeze beer? Then you could kill two birds with one stone.
Well, however they freeze it I want me one. I think I got some FudgeSicles at home in the freezer, which is probably a better place to keep em, as opposed to say, the pantry.
BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! This is never gonna end! I’m hungry! I wanna eat me some lunch! WAH!
Now she says all this stuff’s gonna be on the extranet. So, I could go to the special super secret place and read all this, instead.
Sure, you can. My ex, the Klingon, used to put beers in the freezer alla time. Course they made a big mess in there when he forgot to get them out in time.
I’m a happy swampy now. The call from the bowels of hell aka the national office is over and I had me a nanner sammich and some tater chips. Also, ACBG is taking me to El Vaquero (a yummy Mexican place) for dinner. Even better, it’s Margarita Night at El Vaquero! MMMMMMMMMMMMMM… I shall be fed and liquored up. Well, not too liquored up cause tomorrow is a work day after all and I am a responsible member of society and all that stuff so I don’t stay home from work cause I’m hungover and all that. That ain’t responsible. MMMMMMMM… fajitas!
-swampbear ( MMMMMMMMMMM… guacomole and that good cheese dip!)
See, this is what I love about this place. I write a mash note about Santa the Hunk, and nobody blinks an eye. BTW, I’m not talking about the Clement Moore “bowl full of jelly” Santa, but much more buff (and twinklier) Classic Coke Santa. He’s like a construction worker off-season when the ration between beer/snacks and hard work is out of kilter.
Hey swampy, I’ve got a HIPAA question–I’m trying to prove the grievant is unable to do the job the employer put him in and the person who evaluated him to see what jobs he could do is saying she can’t talk to either side because of HIPAA. This is what I love about this law–the person hired to tell us if he can do a job isn’t allowed to tell us. Explain how this helps my grievant.
And yes, I am holding you personally responsible for HIPAA, swampy, because you’re an expert.
Kalley, being as even the MMP prolly wouldn’t want a HIPAA hijack, I’ll shoot ya an email. IANA HIPAA expert, nobody is, even the folks who keep makin’ this stuff up aren’t. Exciting stuff, huh?
-swampbear (I’ll even send the email before I guzzle margaritas)
I’m thinking he’d be beseeching the goddess for a boinking. Speaking of gods, goddesses, ham sandwhiches, los vaqueros and burly men -
I just came back from lunch, thank Og, and whilst I didn’t eat at *Los Vaquerosand was reading the Weekly Planet and found this “oogy” ad, which perhaps Swampy or Kallessa would enjoy:
In the advert he appears to be wearing some sort of trousers or a jerkin, although that may have been added on later. He is standing with arms akimbo, replete with toolbelt and suspenders to keep the toolbelt aloft, so to speak. He has dark hair past his shoulders and a well trimmed bear(d) and moustache.
There’s a lot of other strange stuff in this weekly, but I may have to open a separate thread for some of the other topics.
*Is that a gay place? It is in Kansas City but not in Clearwater.
**Or La Planeta de la Semana?
**The ad would have been perfect if he changed “serving” to “servicing”.
You know Rue, I’m still cleaning real pine needles out of the creases of my soft top from last year’s pine tree hauling extravaganza. You know, when you haul a big tree around on top of a miata, people point and laugh and honk. I can only imagine what they’d do if I jammed a nine foot tree into the passenger seat. Which is why I’m not getting that particular tree. Nine feet? I don’t live in the Taj Mahal!
So Harley Santa is a stripper too, you’re saying Swampy? I like this holiday more and more every year. Boots an’ chaps, and motorcycles, oh my!
Our little Lady dog used to eat turkey and rice, her last few months. It was gross and it was a measure of my love for her that I not only made her that gunk, but touched it with my bare hands to get it into her mouth. Imagine; ground turkey, squishy rice and no seasoning (bad for her ticker said the doc). Blurg.
And speaking of nakedness, I think I sexually harrassed the UPS guy last night. Now, my UPS guy is gorgeous, sweet, and very married (to Lucinda, their son is Kenny and he plays pee wee football or baseball, or something with pee wee in the name). This adorableness makes him a very tasty treat for some people, but not me, because I’m not that kind of girl. Honest.
I am the kind of girl who bought a new tank top without trying it on and wore it for the first time last night. My UPS guy delivered a package for me and oddly enough, just smiled a lot and then took off. A while later I saw myself in the mirror-- dear lord, my new pink tank top might as well have been made of saran wrap! Trans-freakin’-parent! I flashed the UPS guy! I’m pretty sure I shouldn’t say anything the next time he comes by, but I do believe I’ll be wearing a burqa.
I’m wondering how NakeDan the Handyman shows up at the door. In a tear away jump suit? A bathrobe? Shibb, break something, ship the Shibblets off for the day, call him up and report back to us, ok? Maybe Mrs.Shibb wouldn’t be mad at ya for breaking something if a nekkid repairman showed up to fix it.
Ashes[sup]2[/sup] you vixen you! I accidentally (yes! accidentally!) flashed the UPS guy once. See, I was all alone in my house and sometimes I like to run around all swampbearassed in my house. I do, however, have a robe handy just in case I need to answer the door or sump’n. It just so happened that a few days earlier I had told my next door neighbor they could have a package delivered to my house being as they were expecting one and had to be gone for a few days. Well, the doorbell rang so I put my robe on and answered the door. I, uh, didn’t tie the robe real tight that time and whilst I was signing for the package it came undone and I flashed the UPS man. He didn’t say anything and neither did I but I just know he told all his UPS co-workers all about it in the break room. :o Now, I have a pair of shorts and a bathrobe handy, just in case.
-swampbear (I still say the UPS guy looked longer than he needed to)
