I started to think about this on Christmas Eve, when I realized that I hadn’t given anybody a “Christmas list” of things I wanted. When one is my age, that aspect of the holiday falls by the wayside.
There are things I really want, though, but wouldn’t or couldn’t get for myself. Mostly they are experiences. For example, the top three that come to mind:
A lesson and shooting practice with a muzzle-loading flintlock rifle
A night in a yurt
A video or recording of about two dozen Scots saying (in sequence, not all at once), “Drop your cock and grab your socks”
They’re all possible, given money or effort. Or even without spending a lot of money. My daughter has slept in a yurt, for instance. That’s probably the easiest. I know several places where people have and use muzzle-loading flintlocks, and can probably arrange for you to use one. You’re on your own on hiring Scotsmen or women to say peculiar things, though.
Me, I’d like
1.) Zero Gee experience. A “Vomit Comet” would be fine. I’d even go for one of those “indoor parachuting” experiences. These can be had for more money than I want to part with right now, though.
They will be more possible if we can manage to move to the Pacific Northwest this summer than they are now, while we live in Buttcrack, Illinois. My husband is investigating the yurt situation out there already. He came up with a platform tent campground last night. No dice, buddy. This Girl Scout done slept in plenty of platform tents already.
They have indoor skydiving in nearby Nashua, NH. I don’t know what you consider a lot of money but you can do it for as little as $55 for 2 minutes or $95 for 4 minutes. Four minutes sounds like plenty of time and is still pretty affordable if you only do it once.
A batter dipped deep fried Monte Cristo sandwich, the way Bennegins used to make them. The closest one I can find is at least an hour and a half away, and I haven’t convinced my wife to make the drive with me yet.
A three Worf moon t-shirt ( 3 Worf Moon ). I know I could probably make an unauthorized version myself but I’m too lazy.
Hip hop dance lessons. Mostly just too shy to ask for and too busy to attend this one.
One night with a couple of friends in a completely empty NYC Museum of Natural History. It’s one of those stereotypical five-year-old dreams you’re supposed to grow out of, but it still sounds awesome.
Ninja’d! On concrete Sasquatches? ??? Holy Moly! The one I was eyeballing was just regular concrete color, however. The local horsey feed store near me has a bunch of these various (castings?).
Well what I REALLY want is, once I was driving to, like, Chesterfield or somewhere and saw one of those concrete-stuff places. Like they have St. Francis and birdbaths, you know. Only this one had a huge giraffe. At least ten or fifteen feet tall, maybe taller. Not for people’s houses, for… uh, miniature golf maybe?
I want that giraffe.
I want him professionally installed for safety, and I want to decorate him for holidays, and when people ask me about I want to say “what giraffe?” That would make me so freaking happy. You would not believe how cute his Lincoln’s Birthday outfit would be.
For years, I have been wishing for a life-size concrete rhino for my back yard. I actually looked into getting one, but it turned out that they are prohibitively expensive themselves and also require an expensive concrete base to stand on. Now I am shopping for a smaller rhino.
Two weeks in London England with enough $ to cover any museum entry fee I desire!
When I was a curious child I began to think everything worth seeing was somewhere in a British museum. It seemed whatever my latest obsession it somehow always led back there somehow. It’s on my bucket list.
Not just sail, I want to ride on the Auckland-to-Itajai leg of the Volvo Ocean Race. Cross the brutal, trackless southern Pacific Ocean, further from anywhere than you can get, then down through the Drake Passage and up the coast of Argentina to Brazil. I feel a need to suffer.
I really wanted one of the more powerful Wicked Lasers, but they so fucked up my order that I had to cancel it- it’s on backorder, hey it shipped, oh no it didn’t, what did you want again? Now it looks like they won’t be available here anymore.
The other thing I would like to do is build a MAME cabinet, but that’s really just a matter of ambition.
There are others, but we won’t discuss those wishes here.
Seconded. Being able to pilot a plane would be a dream come true. It’s always struck me as odd how almost all people have this innate urge to fly - nearly everyone dreams about
flying - and yet, biologically, we can’t. I mean, it’s not as common to fantasize about having gills like a fish or digging like a mole. But something about the skies calls to everyone, even though humans have no wings. Paragliding would also be incredible.
I’ve also seen concrete stegosaurus & triceratops.
Damn that’s a tough call between those three.
A pet veterinarian near my old house had 4 concrete statues out front: lion, rhino, hippo, & elephant. All about 5-6 feet nose to tail & 3-4 feet tall at the shoulder.
Which were decorated for each holiday or season around the year with suitable garlands, bonnets, lights, etc.