Official Straight Dope Poll: Women, do you Sit or Hover?

Having been faced with holes in the floor toilets in various parts of the world, I can say without doubt that it’s horrible, unless you’re the sort of woman who only wears skirts and no tights. Otherwise, your trousers-round-your-ankles WILL dip into whatever puddle is inevitably on the floor.

What’s more, I don’t know about other women, but my aim isn’t always that accurate. I’d like to sit, thank you.

Sit, no seat covers. I live on the edge. Plus hovering is weirder than owl shit.

deep breath

I’m possibly about to embarrass myself here, but do other women feel the difference between needing #1 and needing #1&#2?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m completely continent, and know when I need to go to the loo, but it never occurs to me to distinguish between going to the loo just for a wee, or for both.

And I have wondered how men cope, having to pay that much attention to which sphincter is feeling the pressure, in order to choose which facility to commit to entering :stuck_out_tongue:

We manage… :wink:

The hostility in this thread is quite fascinating, btw. Never knew this was such a hot-button issue!

I sit, and i never use one of those papers. if it’s really messy I try to go to another stall, but if it’s the only bathroom around for miles (and I have been in this situation) I absolutely hover, if everyone else has obviously been hovering before me.

As to the squat toilets, I am here to protest! You most certainly don’t get your pants wet. I’ve done it a thousand times and never gotten my clothes wet, not even with salwar-kameez or heavy saris or lenghas. You just get the practice in.

Yeah. I think it’s because the fear of sitting on the toilet seat is based on ignorance (getting cooties, basically, as you can’t catch anything from the seat touching your bum). Ignorance is annoying. That, and the ignoramuses who insist on hovering then piss all over the seat that you want to sit on. And then they don’t wipe away their own piss because they’re too icked out by that. So yes: :mad:

Yup, it’s pretty obvious actually. It had never occurred to me that some people don’t.

As someone who’s never used a squat toilet, I’m having trouble visualizing that. Do your pants go forward or back to stay out of the way? Or do you pull one leg out entirely?

Likewise. There must not be many hover-ers around here, I’ve rarely seen messy seats.

No, you don’t pull one leg out entirely. :slight_smile: That would be really weird.

You pull your pants down and you kind of tuck them behind your knees. So basically your butt and thighs are hanging out. You might even have to wrap your shirt around your waist; the kameez part of the salwar kameez is long, so I often ended up tucking it under my arm.

It sounds complicated but after you’ve done it a couple-three times you do it like second nature.

You wash your butt right there, too; there’s usually a pail of water. The only thing I didn’t like was they didn’t have a way to dry your butt afterwards! So you kind of had to do this little shimmy. Then you pull your pants up, step out, and wash your hands at the sink which is usually less than three feet away - not in the toilet. As a matter of fact, the toilet and “bath” room are usually separated. No one wants to take a bath the same place you go poo.

Ewwww!

But do you sit or hover on the windowsill?

Ignorance, and germophobia. Both of which are annoying. So people who hover are doubly annoying, and that’s without even taking into account if they leave pee everywhere. “Annoying” seems too mild a word for that.

Trust me, the one feels nothing like the other for us guys; no paying of attention is necessary.

Is there much confusion on that score for women? My wife generally is quite clear on whether or not I should expect her to be back from the restroom right away, or whether it might be a somewhat extended visit, but I have no idea how representative she is.

Yeah, I think you need another option – swipe the seat with some TP to make sure it’s dry, then sit. That’s what I do, and it looks like I’m not the only one. (Voted “sit, period” although that’s not precisely correct.)

Um, no. I never have any doubt which call of nature is doing the calling.

Me neither. They’re very different sensations to me. Of course, you might change your mind once you sit down…

I’m a reformed hoverer. Hey - mom taught me from when I was a wee lass that my delicate ass flesh could never touch a public toilet seat lest I get every manner of funky ass rash. It is important to note, she also taught me to clean up after myself, because for f’s sake, your mom doesn’t work here - so there was no sprinkle issue.

I had crazy well developed thigh muscles from hovering like that all the time. Then I started reading here, Broomstick called me a fucking bitch, and ever since I’ve sat down. I only sat in someone else’s pee once, 'cus that’s a lesson that doesn’t need repeating, so there you go.

I can report to this day that my mother carefully wipes down the seat with toilet paper and sanitizer she carries in her purse, lines the whole seat with either TP or a cover if it’s available, and then hovers over the whole set up. It takes her FOREVER in the damn bathroom, but I guess her ass flesh is safe.

Seems like the perfect solution so we can all live in a happy world is for people who hover to simply lift up the seat. Thereby the chance of them peeing on it is nil.

Piss-hover.
Poo-TP the seat and sit. Ever tried to poop and hover. It’s like a plane free falling into the ocean.
Out in wilderness-Stand and piss like a guy. A very useful odd talent. :slight_smile:

I’ve often wondered why more women don’t select this option…that is, the stand and shoot. I realize there is a potential lack of directional control (It would be quite a task to write you name in the snow, for example), but it would solve a lot of hover issues. Could you use a urinal?

How is what happens to your trousers any different than what would happen to them if you either sit or hover over a regular toilet? Remember, I’m talking flushable fixtures that are slightly raised off the ground and well-designed, so don’t picture the worst literal “hole in the ground” uncleaned and unmaintained toilets from hell that you’ve been forced to use out in the middle of nowhere.

It just seems that a substantial percentage of women always hover, and other women are *forced *to hover over the filth that results, so you might as well design some toilets to make it easier to do.

The design could absolutely take bad aim into account. Instead of something that looks like a bowl or a hole, picture something more like “slot” that you straddle, making it so you basically can’t miss. Certainly less likely to miss than hovering over a standard toilet, anyway.

And I think everybody would agree that the general population has a much higher percentage of hoverers than the the results of this poll suggests. Even if some people might resent “giving in” to their ignorance, it seems ludicrous to not design toilets around how a substantial proportion of the population always/sometimes uses them.