Even less attention for poor, poor blanket.
Wait–then who’s John Ashcroft?
BZZZT! It’s *John * Merrick.
Joseph Carey Merrick (1862-1890)
In discussing this with a co-worker, I suddenly had a image of Michael Jackson on a hotel balcony juggling four babies.
First: Ewwwwwwww.
second:
He has three. I suspect they’re getting a little old for his tastes.
That’s the Elephant man, right?
For some reason, Dr. Frederick Treves referred to Joseph as “John” in his memoirs, despite knowing that wasn’t his real name. And since the movie was based partly on the memoirs of Treves, it also used the name “John”.
And yes, Joseph was The Elephant Man.
A dissenter has appeared among the news outlets. E! is saying that this was originally an Enquirer story and that his publicist is claiming it’s not true.
Thank you all for the corrections. I appreciate the snot out of them.
well, with quads, he can name them after his brothers (Tito II, Jermaine II, etc) and then he can reform the Jackson5 with himself! Tito being a butthead about wanting to wear a certain outfit? Well, replace him with Tito II!
It’s genius, really.
As I said in the MPSIMS thread, I think the news story is wrong. Jackson isn’t actually having four separate children; he himself will be twice experiencing mitosis.
Drawn and quartered?
I understand that in an attempt to make amends, he has donated his body to Mattel for them to melt it down and make it into plastic toys. Then children will be able to play with HIM.
I’m surprised he hasn’t gone to the Ralians to have himself cloned-so they can manipulate the genetic material and make the child look like His Hideousness.
(Dear God, look at his CHEEKBONES!!!)
If there’s one dirty trick I could seriously imagine playing during this election season, it would be doing Pro-Bush robocalls with a Michael Jackson impersonation on them:
(in high pitched voice)
“Hi, this is Michael Jackson and I want you to support George Bush. He’s a great man: I don’t believe all these allegations and you shouldn’t either. That’s just ignorant. His No Child’s Left Behind plan is just what our Nation needs today, and it’s just sickening the way people have been spreading unfair and ignorant rumors about him. I don’t believe he’d ever hurt anybody, he loves everybody.”
Of course, then it would have to end with a “Paid for by (my real name)” and I’d get pelted with rotten fruit: but it’s fun to imagine.
Dorothy: Tito II?
GWOTW: Tito II!
I don’t know why people think Michael Jackson’s a sick freak. I have it on good authority he likes having sex with twenty six year olds.
You know, because there are twenty of them.
“Hey, guess who has more kids with more women than you? Michael Jackson!”
“Get the fuck outta here!”
“No, it’s true. He really, really does!”
“No, I’m really, really serious. Get the fuck outta here!”