Oh, stick it in your hole, bitch

I go to a certain dry cleaners because they’re cheap, and near other stores I patronize, so I don’t have to go out of my way. Several times, I’ve gotten something back that wasn’t cleaned because the staff claimed they’d found a hole in it. I mostly wear thin cotton dresses that tear easily; that’s life. So I add the item to my regular mending and bring it back.

Friday, this happened once too often. I got back one dress in plastic and one on the rack, along with the usual, “We couldn’t do this one because it has a hole.” I looked at the frayed notch on the collar and smacked my purse on the counter. “I am sick of this—”

“You have problem you talk to owner!”

“No, I’m talking to you. You always ask for my phone number; can’t you call and tell me you won’t be cleaning something?”

“I am not here to have argument! You talk to owner! If I clean this and you see a hole, you say I did it.”
“You could look at it when I bring it in. Why do you ask for my number? Isn’t it for situations like this?”

“I am busy [there’s never more than one other person in there, and I go in at peak hours. Usually, the shop is empty when I go in.]; I don’t have time to call every hole!”

When they do this, they give me a coupon for what it cost, but for some reason, she agreed to clean it.

Now, I know I snapped first, but I’m still the customer. I’ve had to take a lot worse than that in my customer service. The more efficient dry-cleaners inspect the items while you watch, before they take them away, but of course, I can’t afford to go to those. Anyway, if she has time to notice a hole, she should have time to call about it. Sorry I suggested that you earn your salary, bitch.

You talk to owner! You see bad employee, you say she bad! No earn wages! Drive away business! Can’t use telephone!

All your hole are belong to us!

I am so sorry to say I laughed my ass off at this. Oh the shame!!

I think she’s telling you something, here.

Yeah? What, then?

LMAO I’m sorry Rilchiam, not laughing at you, but that’s the funniest thing I’v heard in a long time!

To bring some reality to this thread …

If the other dry cleaners are more efficient then why do they charge more?

A basic rule of thumb is that if you pay less, you get less. The dry cleaner is able to charge less because it doesn’t inspect the clothes when you bring them in. If you want better service, you have to pay more.

As much as I hate to give practical suggestions to rants, I can’t help it this time.

How much trouble would it be to inspect your own clothes either before you drop them off or in the shop, in front of the employee?

Well, Maeglin, that’s what we agreed to do; I didn’t mention that bit. And eirocc, I didn’t think you were laughing at me.

Monocracy, I understand, but you kind of phrased it wrong. The other dry cleaners charge more because they are more efficient, and I am prevented from taking advantage of that by my financial state. Doesn’t mean Miss Thing doesn’t have to do her job.

Sorry, eirroc. Is that “Corrie” spelled backwards?

Yes Rilchiam it’s my son’s name. Well noticed!

The net, especially the Straight Dope, has trained me to always look backwards and vertically and between the lines. A few weeks ago, watching the Simpsons, I twigged the “Yvan eht Nioj” subliminal immediately, unlike Mr. Rilch and Friend, who didn’t get it until Lisa explained.

Sorry Rilchiam, but what did you expect? I lower my expectations considerably when I shop discount.

The difference between Target and, say, Nordstrom is considerable, and I expect their employees to act accordingly. In some of these places, I am grateful if I don’t get the guys from “Clerks.”

I love a bargain, but I have conditioned myself for the bargain experience, so that it doesn’t get ruined by the hired help.