I hate shopping for pants. I can hardly ever find them in my size and I dislike those dressing rooms. Today Grandma decided that I needed to buy new jeans since my two pairs both have holes and it has been decided that only one pair I can wear to school once they are patched so I must have a second pair. It was also decided that I am the one to pay for them since I have money leftover from Christmas (less then half of what I was given now. And I had hoped to have some of it throughout the next couple of months. Silly me I should have known better.)
So this afternoon I find myself getting driven around to a few different stores and finally to the mall. I even went to a couple of thrift stores but couldn’t find any jeans in my size. The ones at the Experienced Levi’s store though they said they were my size they obviously had shrunk. Once we had gone through the used stuff we decided to go to Walmart and peek in a few other stores. Imagine my shock when I can’t find anything at Walmart either (unless you count this really nice shirt that I decided not to get in the end even though I tried it on and that I am now considering going back to buy)
Finally I end up at Warehouse One the Jeans Store and y’know what? I learned exactly why those jeans weren’t fitting. It seems I’ve put on weight and my jean size has gone up since I last bought them. I only joke about Grandma making me fat with all her good cooking I didn’t mean for it to be true! My older jeans (newest pair being over a year old) have somehow been keeping up with my waist size without my noticing.
So now I have a new pair of jeans bought with money I had wanted to save and have finished with jeans shopping for this year at least. It’ll take about that long before the newest ones will need patching and I’ll have to buy a new pair to replace my now second oldest jeans.
Somewhere, over the years, I went from have a flat, hard abdomen to pushing out a small pot. I like wearing jeans, but in shopping for them have found most designed for people with flat, hard abdomens. They jokingly make expandable waist jeans that do fit, but I have to buy a size larger than I am to keep from looking odd. The area between waist and crotch doesn’t expand. Buy a size that one is supposed to wear and the snugness about that area, followed by the flair at the waist says clearly for all to see ‘middle aged man with pot belly trying to look 25 again.’
I can try on 6 pair of regular jeans for ‘mature’ men (mature meaning fat), and find only 1 which is the size it says it is. Then, I might have to buy a larger size because once washed and dried, they’ll shrink a whole lot.
I’d like to find the original jeans. You put those on and they fit a tiny bit loosely. Then you soaked them while wearing the things and let them dry on your body, shrinking to give you a custom fit. They’re either hard to find these days, or if you do, they’re tremendously expensive. (That always gets me, because they made them out of cheaper, shrinkable cotton based materials.)
I don’t want to wear those baggy jeans designed for ‘older’ men which hang loosely around the groin and crotch, giving the guy a baggy ass look, so I buy regular jeans, struggle into them provided that they don’t sharply indent my little pot and make me look ridiculous, and wear them until they expand some and fit right.
I guess it’s going to be time to start exercising again. Either that or liposuction.
I think Levis still have jeans designed to do this; I bought a pair several years ago. Weird feeling sitting in a bathtub wearing nothing but jeans. Which BTW are difficult to take off when they’re all wet & stiff. (no double entendre intended.)
I’ve worn the same style & size of Levis for over twenty years, which makes it easy!
