Igloo, I gotcha. I know you’re not whining about those letters in general. I think some of us are responding to other comments in the thread, too, so not all remarks are directed to the OP.
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Come now, Igloo, why are you upset? This person has just given you one of the best gifts you’ll receive this holiday season. I, mean, really, how often does someone say something to you so outrageous that it passes from the realm of the offensive to the hilarious? Admit it – this letter is going to have an honored place in your holiday scrapbook!
There’s only one thing to do here – inaugurate a new SDMB holiday tradition. Scylla, write us a Christmas letter!
Ok, question-- which is more annoying? Receiving a printed letter (meaning that several people got the same letter/ information) from a friend that, while you are fond of each other, is busy with school or job and lives 1000 miles away-- this letter explains what’s happened over the past year-- went on a trip to Europe, got a parrot, have been improving in surfing, passed qualifying exams, planning a trip to X for next spring. . . and a card that has a more personalized message of about 10-20 lines. . . OR a card handwritten with handwritten envelope from the same friend that says, “Happy holidays”? Why is it that the latter seldom gets ranted about but people are always pissy about the former?
Or, let me clarify. . . this isn’t the thing people are bitching about is it? Maybe I’m overly idealistic, so tell me-- that first quote in the OP-- is that verbatim? Really? God. No wonder. So does anyone have a beef with a less (unitentionally?) pompus letter? Is the content or the ‘you aren’t really my friend’ thing?
(I ask as I’m currently writing one of these things-- many of its recipients will be people who know what I’m (or husband is) up to in part but various people know different stuff so this gets everyone up to speed (such as one of our Dutch friends, who we know through my husband’s bike career, who we visited and he asked “so why on earth can you speak Dutch, anyway? Are your parents Dutch or something?” He had no idea I was a grad student or studied Dutch art-- he just knew I liked bicycles and beer).)
Are you sure that the letter wasn’t meant to be amusing? A parody? That would be my first thought on reading the first line. Imagine you read it in “The Onion”, would you have any trouble believing you’re not suppose to take it seriously?
Yes, the quote was verbatim, and no, I don’t think it was meant (intentionally) as amusing. I’d like to say that this particular friend is an anomoly but I’ve received other notes that have been as bad (not this year so far).
Capybara, I don’t know if you’re really looking for advice or anything but, quite frankly, from the small amount that you’ve described about your life, I’d like to receive your greeting. Sounds interesting. I think if you have any concerns about it being A Holiday Letter From Hell (which I totally doubt), just ask a friend to review it ahead of time who will be totally honest with you.
I just received one of these from one of my closest friends. He sends one every year, and up until this year, I typically enjoyed reading them. However, circumstances in my life have changed dramatically this year and this time it really bothered a part of me.
Background: I’ve been laid off three times in the last two years and my partner lost his job after Sept 11. The financial burden has been tremendous for us, and there are times when keeping our heads above water is a struggle. Because my friend’s partner is incredibly successful in his professional life, they are pretty well set financially. While I hope it’s unintentional, my friend’s letters always seem to subtley convey just how successful they are. I guess this year, it just sort of hit home.
Because I love my friend dearly, I would never tell him that his letters are offensive to me. And I suppose that for the most part, they aren’t really. Nor do I think he even realizes just how they could come across. But rather than letting any resentment build inside of me, I hope you all will allow me to respond to my friend here. You know, one of those theraputic exercises where you write a letter that you never intend to send.
Dear friends,
It was so wonderful receiving your letter detailing all the events of your year. It sounds as though 2002 was exciting and fruitful for you.
Your new house with five bedrooms, pool and riding stables sounds fabulous. God willing, we’ll be able to hold on to our own house for a few more months. Thanks to the generosity of our families, we’ve been able to make our house payments for the last several months. But that well may be running dry for us and we’re not sure how much longer we will be able to stave off foreclosure.
Your trips to Tahiti, Cabo San Lucas and the French Riviera must have been fantastic. But don’t think we didn’t do some travelling ourselves! In the spring, KepiPartner’s sister paid for us to go on an overnight trip to Shreveport, where we actually won a couple hundred bucks in one of the casinos! Helped make one of the car payments, it did! In July, KepiPartner’s brother asked us to accompany his family on a two day-trip to the Texas coast at his expense. It was enjoyable and relaxing, and it let us save a little on grocery expenses that month. And just last week, as a Christmas present to ourselves, we drove up to Oklahoma City to attend a concert. However, due to a shortage in funds, we weren’t able to overnight there, so we drove back home the same night,
Overall, I’d say this year is comparable to the last couple. Thankfully, all our friends and family are still with us and we’re still in pretty good health (although the stress is beginning to take its toll!) Here’s hoping great success for us all in the coming year.
Love,
Kepi and KepiPartner
PS: If you should purchase any large appliances in the next few months, could you please hold onto the cardboard boxes? They may prove to be useful for us should the mortgage company come knocking.
I’m not bitter. Really.
Kepi, I know exactly how you feel. Hubbo and I are going through a bit of a rough patch now financially, and when my best friend called and told me she got a $1500 Christmas bonus from a company that is paying her double what mine is paying me, I was happy for her. At least, I was really, really trying to be happy for her.
As for Christmas letters, my, well, let’s call it a decision, to never keep in touch with anyone is looking like the popular choice.