I got TWO of them today: the dreaded Christmas letter, or, a Brag Sheet disguised as a holiday greeting.
Let me share an excerpt of one:
“K received high honors for the first quarter…He was one of the few kids who played both offense and defense (on his football team)…In the summertime, he did a lot of pitching and had a batting average of .578 for the season…”
"A was by far the cutest cheerleader out there…“I cannot believe how good she has gotten on the piano. I could listen to her play all day.”
:rolleyes:
And on and on it went.
You know what? I don’t give a shit about your son’s batting average. I don’t care that your daughter has mastered a backflip. I know your type. You’re the one with the “My son is an honor student” sticker plastered on the back of your car. Yours is the van that is all decked out with streamers and paint because your 7 year old is going to the “state soccer championship.” The fact that there are 2,000 “state championships” does not defuse your enthusiasm.
Newsflash: In all frankness, your kids aren’t special to ANYONE save yourself. The Star of David wasn’t shining in the sky the night your child was born. In case you didn’t notice, Christmas is supposed to be about the HUMBLE birth of Jesus Christ, not an occasion for you to crow about your child, aka the second coming.
Listen, if I know you well, I already KNOW all about your life. If I don’t, then why the hell would you think I care that you took a fabulous vacation this year?
Christmas letters are like fruitcake: they may be a tradition but NO ONE wants them.
No, actually, they’re like television shows: if you don’t like them, you don’t have to subject yourself to them, and it’s kind of ridiculous to berate people for creating something that others enjoy just because it’s not your cuppa.
I like getting Christmas letters. If you don’t, I suggest you go down to K-Mart and buy a trash can.
You are, hand to Og, the first person that I have heard NOT complain about Christmas letters. The sentiment I hear is usually that presented in the OP, if not much, much more bitter
Luckily, my family doesn’t do this. A: We all don’t like each other enough to take the time to brag and B: Most don’t have much to brag about.
Ah- Dysfunction! The TRUE meaning of the holidays!
I agree that it is a poor subsitute for actually keeping in touch, but for people who were once close I guess it is nice to hear what is going on in their lives.
Why? How hard is it to throw them away unopened? If you don’t have the self-control to do that, then it’s really difficult for me to care about the agonizing pain they cause you when you read them. Are you going to pit spoiled milk for tasting bad, or the stairs for hurting you when you throw yourself down them?
The idea that she doesn’t give a shit about her friend’s son’s sports successes, but that strangers on a messageboard would give a shit about her not giving a shit–it boggles the mind.
If they’d put the really interesting stuff in the letters, like that Kylie was pulled over for DUI, that Gazza got his girlfriend knocked up, and Tristan failed Grade 3 because he is a little punk who gave the teacher a hard time…then they’d be worthwhile.
I got one the other day from a sister I have not spoken to for over 10 years. Although it was full of stuff about how wonderfully well her daughter is doing at Uni, and how successful the sis and her husband are doing economically and socially, I have heard from other sources that it might not be as glowing a picture as they have painted.
Put the real true-life news in. Christmas is a time for sharing our humanity, not a forum for pomposity.
I can’t stand those ridiculous things. Assuming anyone gives a crap about the mundane details of your lives all year long is nothing but self-involvement at its best.
We just got our first last night. The S.O. was cracking up as I went off on my tirade about how little I gave a crap about the mundane details of these people’s lives (in their defense, I’ve never met them, they’re old collegues of the S.O., with whom he has not spoken in a couple of years, at the very least. If they were that damn interested in keeping in touch, they should’ve picked up the phone at some point in the past two years.) Now, I don’t mind if its brief and just highlights the big stuff, like new jobs, college, stuff like that. But no one gives a crap about you remodeling your home (and we really don’t need two paragraphs solely dedicated to every detail of the remodel), how many books you read over the summer (the S.O. almost called this woman to beg for the titles of those 7 books, as he was losing sleep over not knowing!), or in the OP’s case, your kids batting average. I repeat, no one gives a crap about the mundane details of your lives over the past year.
I gave my mother a metric ton load of shit when she started doing these and was beyond embarassed to be included. Of course, it didn’t help that the damn dog got more ink than me.
Sad a pathetic. It is too bad this person mistakes you for a friend. You should copy this rant down and mail it them so they can understand who you are and not who they think you are.
If my son is doing the work and using his mind to make an honor roll I’d sky-write it over my house. For him, if not for you, and if you can’t enjoy his success that is unfortuate. With all the bad you hear today and the crap many share with total strangers I would think you’d love being privleged to be included in the happiness that these people mistakenly think you, a friend, might enjoy hearing about.
Pathetic.
Reading other posts, I too wish people would put the really interesting happenings in those stupid letters. Arrests, break-ups, barroom brawls. Now that would be cool (comon’, any letter ending with “bitch deserved it!” would be awesome). As a matter of fact, there was some discussion in my house last night about making up one of these letters, chalk full of dramatic storytelling, just to see people’s reactions.
And if this doesn’t qualify as the mundane details of your life, I don’t know what does.
What really strikes me as self-involvement is when someone says, “I hate listening to the boring shit from your life–listen to the boring shit from mine!”
You’re totally correct. I look forward to you posting your email address, so that we may all send our own letters - after all, you want to hear all about the successes of our lives over the past year, correct? There seems to be thousands of us - what joy you’ll have reading them! :rolleyes:
No, no, I don’t care if the son is on the honour roll. I don’t care if the son missed the honour roll by 2%. I don’t care if the son failed half his classes and has to go to summer school. I don’t care if the son ate paste there and got stuck to the toilet seat. I would not, in fact, care if the son is 12 years old and starting university next year, because that means the son is brilliant and has always been brilliant and always will be brilliant, and there is really no need to remind us every year lest we forget. Nothing short of the son being born, or getting married, or dying, or selling all his possessions to join a Brazilian cult will justify, to my mind, the parents telling everyone they know and have known about this. NOTHING.
And your comparison is stupid. Now, if I were to print and mail out any MPSIMS thread I had started in the past year to everyone I know or have known in the past 10 years, then you’d be onto something.
Maybe these “Christmas letters” are an American thing. I’ve never gotten such a letter as the ones described here; During the holidays I’ll get some cards from friends and family that say something like, “Hope you’re doing well; Been thinking of you; Have the best Xmas; etc…” Sometimes these are accompanied by small photos of themselves and/or family. I don’t mind these kinds of greetings at all. In fact I feel happy that they thought of me.
Ah, the Christmas Family Newsletter. I never realized they were the source of anything more than amused exasperation. I receive them occasionally enclosed in a holiday card and they provoke one of two possible responses:
An amused, eye-rolling reading followed by a “good for them!” and then an unceremonious deposit in the trash can.
An unceremonious deposit in the trash can sans reading.
The cards that they are sent inside are always put on my holiday card holder.
End of story. No frothing indignation or raised blood pressure. I find this method is much more conducive to good holiday cheer.
I really like fruitcake. I am tired of hearing it derided just because the majority of substance produce in the US that goes by the name has no resemblance to the real, true tastiness of a good rich, moist chunk of homemade bliss. On the other hand, I’m pretty glad not to receive circular letters any more, as it’s easier to keep up with my friends and family by reading their livejournals Progress, I tell you!
