My kids have been going bonkers about Valentine’s day all week, and my younger daughter (pre-school) got out of class with the biggest grin I’ve ever seen her sport. “Best day ever,” she declared.
Nearest I can tell, their V-day activity is much as I remember as a wee lad in the 80s – everyone brings in 1 card for each classmate, regardless of gender or even your personal feelings for them – and they exchange the cards. Except now all of the cards include candy! It’s like red and pink Halloween.
Anyway, I always hated the Valentine’s day thing when I was in school; I think it was because I had a hard time separating the romantic aspect from the school tradition. Also, there was very little candy, and candy hearts are awful.
When did this classroom tradition start? And did it use to be more… selective?
When I was in grade school in the 60’s you could get those packs of cards with enough for everyone in the class. I seem to remember themes like Peanuts or TV cartoons characters. At that time we were encouraged but not required to being one for each person and we had slots for each student on the bulletin board. No candy that I remember except that sometimes the teacher would hand out candy hearts.
In the 80/90’s my kids were required to bring one card per kid or we could opt out entirely. Candy was discouraged.
I believe we got to exchange cards with whomever we wanted. I don’t remember candy. This was in the late 60s to mid-70s, way before the all-inclusive society we’re trying to build now.
If you didn’t get a card, suck it up. Yeah, that’s what it was like. And in gym class when we had to pick teams, we picked teams. I was last for a lot of stuff early on due to my size and unfamiliarity with the games being played. I got better.
The classroom tradition I remember was cutting hearts out of red construction paper. You’d fold the paper in half and then cut out half a heart along the fold, so that the resulting product would be symmetrical.
Mine ended up looking more like moths than hearts, though.
I’m 27 and we did the whole class Valentine thing every year of elementary school. We’d make little “mailboxes” and everyone would bring valentines and candy for the whole class.
When I was a kid in the mid-'80s, everyone gave a card to everyone, candy optional. I guess you probably could opt out, but I don’t remember anyone ever doing so.
I started kindergarten in 1978 so I straddle the old/young line. I don’t think we were required to give everyone a card but most kids did it anyway. We certainly bought the bulk packs of generic cards that were suitable to give to anyone or at least anyone of the opposite sex. I don’t think we gave cards to same-sex classmates or at least not the heart type cards. We might have given superhero and truck cards to other boys but I can’t remember for sure. If we brought candy, we generally brought enough for everyone.
If anyone singled someone out to give a special card to, rest assured that there was going to be lots of singing about sittin’ in a tree once we got to recess.
In 1947 -48 the rule in Miss. Yoder’s first grade was that everybody got a valentine’s day card from everybody else. Tearing thy apart on those perforated lines was a hard chore for sex year old hands.
The tradition of something for all so no one gets hurt did not exist in the 60s, at least not everywhere. many were the “losers” held up for an additional shot of public humiliation that day. It happened to me, I saw it happen to others.
Yes, you could see it happen and just like with the Simpsons’ Ralph Wiggum, you could see it in some kids’ faces
I attended elementary school in the first half of the 1990s. Vday was a free-for-all at my smallish Indiana school (HS graduating class of 200ish, elementary class sizes around 20). We weren’t required to bring cards or candy for everybody. I would get cards for my friends, and that was about it.
Elementary school in the late 70’s. We didn’t have any hard rules to make sure everyone got one, but we did have contests to see who could make the best mailbox. I remember making home made valentines out of construction paper and lace doilies then gluing the best thing in candy at the time, a Hershey’s Kiss, to it.
I was pretty cool that year around Valentine’s day for sure…
It started in 3rd grade 1967; everyone in class got a card from everyone else out of a classroom pack your mom bought at the 5 and dime store. Thing is, some of those cards were not as appealing as some of the others. I recall one not so attractive girl got a lot of monkey and “Pig Pen” cards. Kids are cruel and it’s one of the reasons I don’t care much for the day; just another popularity contest that doesn’t mean anything (like homecoming Queen).
I’m 55. As I recall, everyone got one for everyone else. I don’t remember any discussion of optional/mandatory, that’s just what we were told to do. I remember thinking it was stupid (or really, just an annoying thing I had to do when I could be doing something good like watching TV or playing with legos).
I also only remember one particular valentine, which was from a cute girl, with the message “I hate you” inside. I got a chuckle from it, thinking she really probably meant “despise”. I was not scarred for life, and think it’s funny I even remember it.
Yep, even 50+ years ago, we’d bring in a valentines card for everyone in the class, or occ made them en masse in class. A few of the girls had candy hearts included with the ones they handed out. Once in a while, you’d buy or get one that wasn’t out of a set for that one kid you had a little crush on.
I was in first grade in 1955-56, so this is going back a few years.
I remember not getting hardly any valentines, on more than one Valentine’s Day, in early grade school. I remember at least one year when everyone gave everyone a meaningless valentines card. Then I think our school decided to just stop exchanging any cards on Valentine’s Day, or maybe it was just that way for the older students (my school was K-8).
I was very glad when it stopped, it always seemed to me another opportunity for other kids to show me I wasn’t popular, which is something I already knew.
Roddy
My children are in preschool, and they were asked to bring cards for their class and a bag of candy. We used the free Valentines Cards their Taekwando school had printed and made for them to hand out, and the plus is the children get a free month worth of lesson if their parents want to redeem the cards at our TKD school. Win-Win!
Honestly I don’t remember what I did for Valentines day in elementary school. I don’t remember even celebrating Valentines day at school, but I assume it was similar to what my kids have to do.
The trend I am a little worried about is my two 5 year olds (ones a boy and ones a girl) telling me they have a girlfriend and boyfriend at school. :dubious: I am not sure I am ok with that
I started school in 1980, I believe. We were instructed to bring cards for all or cards for none. There were a couple of candy-giver-outers, but not many. We did indeed make “mailboxes” decorated with paper hearts and doilies.
My daughter just came home with more sugar than she got at Halloween. A memo went home before Halloween specifically asking us not to send candy (cards or pencils or plastic doo-dads were okay), and the Room Moms made little bags of candy with 5 or 6 pieces for each kid instead. Valentine’s Day looks like the new diabetic nightmare.
Some rich mo-fo bought their kid Russell Stover heart boxes of chocolates to give to every kid in her 2nd grade class. :rolleyes:
In my school in the Fifties, you brought cards for your friends. However, you were always on edge about how many you’d get. When I was in sixth grade or so, I remember coming home and mentioning to my mom that one student had received only one. She immediately handed me one, had me sign it, and sent me to his house. It was difficult for me because I was very shy, and by that time there was the whole worry that now he would think I “liked” him. I understand now, of course, but back then I just walked pretty slowly to his house.
No rules about not passing out birthday invitations at school, either, but by fourth or fifth grade most kids knew to pass them out on the sly, and not make a big production about who you were inviting.
Kids are cruel and it’s one of the reasons I don’t care much for the day; just another popularity contest that doesn’t mean anything (like homecoming Queen).