I got this letter in my campus mail today. It’s from an outfit called Empire Who’s Who.
Oh man, where to start? How about that I’m an undergraduate college student who’s work career involves summers running a register, cleaning the store, and showing both the technically-challenged and travelers from New Jersey how to work a gas pump. I can’t imagine where you people bought my name from, but it’s obvious you weren’t doing any research. Plus, I don’t even live in Huntingdon or even Pennsylvania. I just go to school here. Seeing as how my individual achievement in my possible career field is taking classes and averaging maybe a 3.0 in them, I’m sure that’d make me an interesting subject.
So, should I just toss this as I was planning, or should I try to string them along? They want a job title, industry, personal speciality, principal product, service, or activity, and type of business. It strikes me that this would be perfect practice for future resume padding. For example:
Job Title: Refined Petroleum Products and Other Goods Salesman
Industry: Refinement and Distribution of Petroleum Energy Sources
Principal Product, Service or Activity: Sales of Various Petroleum Distillates
Personal Speciality: Learning and Using New Technology Used in Sales of Petroleum Distillates
Type of Business: Petroleum Distillates Sales and Service
In other words, that is, the real world:
Job Title: Gas Station Attendant
Industry: ChevronTexaco Franchise
Principal Product, Service or Activity: Attending a Gas Station
Personal Speciality: Running a register
Type of Business: Gas Station
What do you guys think? And even if I string them along, I’m not paying for one of those stupid books, so it’s not like it’ll be printed anyway.