This is digging up an old wound for me, but it is something that still fucking bothers me to this day, and I’d like to know if any dopers have has similarly frustrating experiences with the law.
Background:
In the state I lived in carrying a gun in any manner other than ammo seperate and gun locked was illegal. I had a gun in my car anyway. Impetuousness of youth? Stupidity? Fuck it. It was a little of both and some other poor character traits which I had at the time. Let it be said that I admit it was-- shall we say-- a poor decision in the first place and leave it at that.
SO, a friend who was living a good 30 minutes away was in town for the night and we went to the bar. I had one beer at approximately 8 and then we drank cokes for the rest of the night. We left the bar at 11:30 PM and were still up for bullshitting, so we were just driving around town, catching up on shit. I make a turn down a street and realize the time we;ve spent cruising, so I decide to turn around and head back to the bar to drop him off. I had to work at 7 AM the next morning and it was pushing 12:00 as it was. Conveniently there was a business’s drive to tun around in.
This is a long drive; the business is set back rather far. So I pull in and suddenly we hear it: an alarm is going off. “Fuck,” I tell him, “the fucking alarm is going off.” Master of the Obvious, I know. So I hurredly turn around and start to leave when we hear the sirens approach. As I neared the exit the cop cars pulled in and there I sat. Looking like I was leaving as, in fact, I was.
“Driver, turn off your car!” I did. I lit a cigarette. “Step out of the vehicle! Both of you!” We did. They pull us apart and start asking some questions.
Cops: “What were you doing there?”
Me: “Turning around.”
Cops: “Where were you going?”
Me: “To drop my friend of at his car so we could both go home.”
Cops: “Why is that alarm going off?”
Me: “I have no idea.”
Cops: “You know there’s been a robbery there within the last month?”
Me: “No.”
Cops: “What were you doing there?”
Me: “I just told you.”
Cops: “We’ve got probable cause here; my partner is going to search your car. Ar we going to find anything?”
~~At this point, I’m merely standing there facing the car in cuffs. The cop is behind me.
Me: “Yeah. There’s a .45 under the passenger seat.”
Cops: “GUN! GUN IN THE CAR!” Their panic escalates.
Cop by car: “I’ve got the gun!”
erl gets his rights read and is stuffed in the car.
Funny thing is, both my friend and I were put in the back of the same car. He says to me: “What the fuck are we going to tell them?”
“The truth.” pause “That fucking alarm. God damn. Story of my fucking life.”
“This is like something that would happen to *******. His luck is just as shitty.”
“Yeah,” I say. ******* once got a flat tire, called a tow truck, and when the tow truck came it, too, got a flat tire. Fucking incredible. I laughed, remembering. “I’m fucked,” I tell him. He says nothing.
So we’re in the holding cell for all of two minutes and then we both get taken to seperate questioning rooms. More dialogue follows.
“So you want to tell me why you were there when the alarm was going off?” he asks me.
“I told you already,” I said, recognizing the cop. “I was just turning around and heard the alarm go off.”
“Why were you in such a hurry to leave?”
“I think that’s obvious: a fucking alarm was going off. I didn’t want to be a part of whatever was going on there. Do you know yet what caused the alarm to go off?”
“Not yet, they’re still investigating. Why did you have a gun in your car?”
“Why do you carry a gun with you?”
“What is that supposed to mean?” he quickly retorts. I shrug and offer no more response. “We found some black gloves and a black scarf in the car, too. Wanna tell me about those?”
“They’re for keeping warm and working outside.”
“Its only September.” I look at him like he’s from another planet.
“It’s been cold in the mornings, remember? My job requires me to work outside in the mornings, and its cold, and I wear protective gear. The gloves double as stopping holly bushes from poking me; regular gardening gloves don’t do the trick.”
“Yeah, but they’re black.”
“So? Your uniform is midnight blue. This table is off-white with fucking scratches in it.”
“You mean you don’t think that is a little suspicious?”
“It is a color.” He looks at me. “No, I don’t.”
“Well, I do. When I see a car pulling out of a lot with an alarm going off, and the guy has dark clothing and a weapon in the car I get a little suspicious.” I shrug at the cop and reply.
“Yes; I admit all factors taken together it would certainly raise an eyebrow.”
“So why do you carry the gun?”
“Why would anyone carry a gun?”
“That’s not an answer.”
“You didn’t like my last one either. Should I just start making things up for you?” He sighs a tired sigh. He gets up and leaves for a bit. I stare at the boring walls and think about absolutely nothing. If ever I was a Zen master it was at that moment. The cop returns and sits down again.
“We’ve been questioning your friend.”
“I expected as much,” I tell him.
“He had some interesting things to say.” What? What the fuck would he have said? “Care to tell me again why you have that gun?”
“I don’t mind you asking the same questions over and over again, ‘What are you doing there?’ ‘Why do you have a gun?’ but you’re going to get the same or similar answers each time you ask because they’re the truth. Why don’t you tell me what you want to hear so we can get this interview over with; obviously I’m not answering correctly.” I am told that I’m being charged with some felony concerning a firearm and am then taken into the fingerprinting room.
They check my shoes, they check my mouth, they pat me down for the third time that evening. They ask me factual questions regarding age, SS number, had I ever been arrested before (no), and take my fingerprints. They asked if I had anything to drink that evening. I tell them yes, in fact, I had a single beer at 8PM. They give me two drunk tests, one where I had to stand on one leg and say the alphabet, and another where I had to follow the female cop’s pen around. Amusing.
“You’re pretty calm about all of this.”
“Getting upset isn’t going to solve anything.”
They finish booking me and walk me back to the holding cell. As we’re heading back I ask, “So did you find out about the alarm yet?”
“Yep. False alarm. There was no visible damage to the building, and all doors were locked.” Great.
I am not allowed to sleep in the holding cell. Cold as it is, I am not allowed to pull mu arms inside of my shirt.
On the way to county lock-up, the cop and I are bullshitting (same cop I’ve been with the whole time) about various things. Television, music, politics. Kids. Adults. Little snippits of commentary that may have been cut and pasted from any opinion page in any local newspaper.
“You know,” he said, “When you said there was a gun in your car, I drew mine out and had it right at your back.”
“No, I didn’t know.”
“If you had even flinched I would have shot you.”
****What the FUCK do you say to that? I have never been in a life threatening situation before. My adrenaline was long gone, but apparently my fight or flight response had at least occurred at the right time; I wasn’t flinching then. How do you respond to a guy who just informed you he would have fucking killied you for flinching?
I was stunned. I still am. Was he even serious, or just being a hard-ass? What did he have to gain from telling me that? Was it supposed to command awe in the power of the police? Was it supposed to make me respect him? Was it to put the fear of God in me?
I was just informed that the man who was transporting me to confinement had no qualm about killing me.****
“Really,” was what I came up with.
“You never know what you’ge going to come up against.” Except for the fact that I fucking TOLD you what you were going to find.
I had nothing more to say to the man. In hindsight, I was far too polite, by my measure, to a guy who was prepared to end my life while I was in handcuffs in a town where the biggest crime was a few drug dealers getting busted every odd year and curfew violations. There were few areas where a cop had such a life. There were no gunfights. The occassional drunk got rowdy at the local diner. Andy fucking Griffith would have been at home (after a little modernization, anyway).
Well, I suppose it isn’t much of a rant. To tell the truth, I just hated the questioning I had received by the guy. What I gave above was a somewhat shortened version; in all honesty I had the same questions asked of me at least five times each, not including when he was asking me stuff at the scene. I also was not impressed with being informed that I was on the verge of death.
For some closing, I should note that my friend was not so cool with the questioning. In an attempt to get the cop to stop asking questions he ended up making up a story about how we were homosexual, and I had “a thing” for black gloves and guns. What a fucking character. But that answer satisfied the cops; oh, they ate that right up.
I should have told him the fucking aliens were out to get me if what he wanted was a sack of shit he could smear on his report.
Fuck him. Fuck him and his testosterone-ridden morality. I’ve never been the most upstanding citizen, I won’t lie, but let me tell you, my experience with him fell drastically short of reform.
Some other interesting tidbits from this, the owner of the establishment I worked at confronted me about the affair with his brand of street justice and prompty informed me that if I screwed up even a little bit (which I never had before that point) I was out.
The local paper was sure to use “alleged” in accusing me, while giving out my address to he entire county. At least they spelled my name right.
The county prosecutor was happy to bring it down to a misdemeanor provided I plead guilty and turn over the gun. though my lawyer wanted to, originally, push that they shouldn’t have searched my vehicle he felt I should take it. So I did. My lawyer also told me that I should never volunteer information to the police… just in case my trust wasn’t already at an all-time low.
In county jail I met three other people who were also in for the exact same thing I was. I found out that I was charged with a fourth degree felony; a fifth (one grade lower) degree was B&E, which I met a chap who was in there for just such a thing. Apparently actually damaging property and attempting to steal it isn’t quite so bad.
It was then that I lost all faith in my government and its method of policing. They have done nothing indicative of trying to earn that trust back. Could it have been worse? Of course; I could have been dead for flinching. Would have made a fantastic epitaph.
Anyone who says that the government doesn’t have too much power has never been arrested by assholes.