I have an older dog - 10 years old - whom I have had since he was a puppy. He’s always been good natured (although he barks a lot at people… and sounds, and sometimes molecular atrophy.)
I now have young children in the house. Just recently the dog has started to bite the children when they try to pet him. The first time or two we weren’t in direct line of sight so we didn’t know if the kid was being a typical pre-schooler and overstepped his bounds and got a warning nip or not. This week my wife saw the child in the room with the dog, who was just sitting there calmly and wide awake. The child walked up slowly from the side and gently went to pet the dog’s back. They dog bit him without provocation.
I am realizing this dog is only going to be getting more grumpy and old as time goes by, and the kids will want to show him love. The do really like the dog.
However my first instinct and duty is to protect my child. Any ideas?
Are you sure the dog is not in pain? My brother’s 10-year-old dog has started snarling at the toddlers when they pet in a certain spot but she is having a lot of problems with limping and pain in her legs.
Besides pain, the dog may have a degree of blindness and/or deafness that is causing it to be surprised by the sudden contact. If so, you need to teach the kids how to approach the dog with the offer to pet it, and reading the dog’s yes/no signals, which aren’t too hard to recognize.
It could also be that one/some of the kiddies have been annoying or too rough with the dog, and the dog now sees them as a nuisance. Gentle, non-threatening approaches with lots of treats from the kids could go a long way to reversing this.
Are the kids petting in one direction, or rubbing back and forth? some animals find it really annoying-- or just overstimulating, which can lead to nipping-- to have their fur rubbed the wrong way, and it can be hard for young children to “get” petting in one direction. With my son, I had to do lots of modeling and hand-over-hand before he got to petting our hyper-sensitive cat in a way that didn’t get her over-stimulated, which made her claw at his hand. It was especially confusing for him, I think, because the dog and the other cat didn’t care.
Also, is the dog having sibling rivalry issues with the kids? if the dog has been your kid for a long time, and now there are rivals for your attention, they could already have strikes against them when they approach. Time might help, as well as you arranging to be alone with the dog. Does he still get a walk every day? one that isn’t constantly redirected by the children’s needs? If not, then is there is some way to arrange even a short walk with just you every day, or every other day?
The dog will get grumpier, but the children will get older, and as they do, they will get less annoying. G-d willing, you will have several more years of the dog, and the kids will learn to work things out. Our dog will be 15 in January, so, it’s possible-- and she’s a pretty good-sized dog too, about 70 lbs.
Dogs can be very good at hiding their pain. Nipping at people when they tried to pet him was the first sign we had that our old dog was in pain. it’s worth a trip to the vet to rule this out.
Children should not ever be allowed around the dog anymore. If it’s impossible to truly separate them with 100 certainty, then the dog should wear a basket muzzle when kids are around. Definitely a vet exam to rule out pain/vision/hearing problems, and a consult with a good trainer isn’t a bad idea either.
How big a dog is this? It may actually be fear-based if it’s a small dog. Is this a brand new behavior, as in has he previously been ok with small kids? If he’s not been around them he may need to be taught that they are not aliens or odd-shaped animals, and learn that toddlers are people and to be respected.
The kids need to be taught too, they should learn to never approach the dog but let the dog come to them (supervised of course!).
What saje said (and I agree with the basket muzzle; many allow a dog to drink and pant, unlike soft muzzles. OTOH, a muzzle of any kind is just a temporary bandaid.)
1: Full vet exam - blood work, joint manipulation to check for arthritis, dental check-up.
2: I would not allow this dog unrestricted freedom around any children at this point.
It also depends on the dog’s level of training and comfort around children, and the children’s level of training and understanding around dogs. At ten years old and depending on history, most of the behaviour modifications ought to come from the humans around the dog; an older dog should not be expected to suddenly undo and change entrenched behaviours.
I agree. Isolate the dog from the children or muzzle it. If that is just not possible the dog has to go. I know people love their dogs but risking a child getting mauled is just not worth it. Do you have a friend who might want the dog?
Does the dog have a bed of its own? Maybe you should start by teaching the children not to touch the dog when he is on his bed, and put the bed in your room, or some other place the children don’t typically go without you anyway. (Unless he doesn’t like being alone; then you might have to leave it in the living room or something.) At least once a day, when dog is not on bed, go through a routine where the children offer the dog treats, and then pet him by approaching him from the front, and petting him nicely. If he reacts badly, scold him, then after a couple of minutes, take him to his bed, and remind the children that he is to be left alone when he is on his bed.
He should pick up on the fact that they stay away from the bed, and learn to retreat to it.
Anecdote: In the mid 1990s I got a young dog (GSD mix) who had severe fear-aggression issues. I didn’t even know what that meant at the time and actually did think about having her euthanized after she tried to bite a couple of people…but I went to a “dog shrink” (the term behaviourist didn’t even exist at the time, (I don’t think) and he gave me a lot of insight and strategies for keeping her safely.
I decided to keep her, but part of me being her owner was to protect her from stress. new people, children, chaos, crowds, loud noises, etc. I tell you that dog taught me more about dog ownership and dog psychology than any other dog ever did. You learn most from the difficult ones! She had a very full life - lots of hikes and bike rides and even road trips, and never did bite anyone after I figured out her triggers. She lashed out defensively because she was stressed; once I learned how to manage that she was great.
She was maybe 18 months old when I first thought that euthanizing her would be the responsible thing to do. She was almost 16 when I finally did do that (because of severe joint pain, and she was just old and getting miserable.)
But, you have to be willing to manage the situation, and have the ability to do so. Had I had kids in my life when I first got Phoebe, I probably would have let her go. I didn’t, so it was easy for me to manage.
As a last resort, before trying to rehome a dog that old, you can also ask your vet about medication. The vet may be willing to give you something like Valium while you work on training the dog. If you give the dog medication before a training session with the kids so the training session doesn’t stress him out, it might be more successful, and he might start to associate feeling mellow with being around the children.
I’m not joking-- I know people who have used medication as a last resort when a dog was on the edge of possibly being put doing for fear-aggression, or stress-aggression-- these were usually rescue dogs, but it must be stressful for an older dog to confront living with little kids for the first time. I’m also saying try some other things first, but it’s something to keep in the back of your head.
No, I have known people who used Valium for behavior problems in both dogs and cats; do dogs on an MAOIs have to follow the same restricted diet humans do? it would mean being extra vigilant that the dog never got something like cheese, IIRC, but it’s a thought.
I’ll join those who said pain. I had a 12 year old dog that had a cancer growing from his ear into his head. We had no idea the pain he was in but suspected something when he became mean and nippy as opposed to the nice and lovey he had previously been.
Another theory, though it may not fit the OP, I had a dog that became oddly protective of my wife. She didn’t really like him and spent the least amount of time with him. But if anyone else were around, especially kids, he would stand in front of her and “guard her”. He also became nippy if anyone tried to pet him if my wife were around. Otherwise he was a very nice pooch.
Are the pre-schoolers new to the household or have they grown up with the dog?
I would also have the dog checked for pain. I second the thought that dogs are very good at hiding pain, and humans can often be clueless about the subtle signs. While the kids may not have done anything to the dog, the dog could be worried or stressed about the kids and reacting to that.
For everyone’s sake, the kids’, the dog’s and yours, the kids need to be told to stay away from the dog. The dog didn’t bite without provocation, the child approached and touched the dog. Was the dog giving signs that no one was paying attention to? Eyes, ears, lips, body posture?
What kind of dog is it? some breeds give subtler warning signs than others. Labs tend to do a lot of whining and yapping before they move on to nipping. One of the reasons Pit Bulls have the reputation they have is that, IME (and I love them and have had a couple of them) they tend to tolerate some pretty rough treatment until suddenly they have had enough. Usually they just get up and go away, but if they can’t for some reason, they can nip in what seems out of nowhere, unless you know the dog really well, and can pick up on its much subtler signs. Hounds tend to be really tolerant of a lot, but they also tend to “suddenly” have enough, and not do as much growling and yapping as other breeds might do.
If your dog it giving off signals that are just too subtle for a toddler, you may just have to keep them separate unless you can be in the room. But the children will get older, and will learn eventually.