Whimsical thread about potential lawyerly advice wherein each post begins with the phrase “On the advice of my attorney, I have”.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to wear pants today.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided not to take his advice.
My attorney has advised me not to post to this thread.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to pay my legal bills rather than buy food for my family.
My attorney’s kind of a dick, to be honest.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to no longer be honest.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decied to wear the orange shirt today, with kelly green pants.
(My attorney is colorblind. I probably shouldn’t take fashion advice from him.)
On the advice of my attorney, I have switched to decaf.
On the advice of my attorney, I paid him.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided that “catch me if you can” is the incorrect response to police flashing lights in my rear view mirror.
On the advice of my attorney, I am having coffee and rhubarb pie for breakfast.
On the advice of my attorney, I have called a better attorney.
On the advice of my attorney, I must drive to Las Vegas at top speed before I turn into a wild animal.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to stop eating burritos.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to stop investigating my attorney’s alleged credentials.
On the advice of my attorney, I’m getting a haircut & a new suit.
(Plus I still need to buy a gift for his now-expensive-for-me wedding)
On the advice of my attorney, I am now a Puerto Rican woman named Gladys.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided not to make any more decisions.
On the advice of my attorney, I have decided to lay down the law.
On the advice of my attorney, I’m just going to sign it and be done with it.
What could go wrong??
At the advice of my attorney I decided to have another beer.
(True Story, I had an attorney friend who would say quite often, “As your attorney I advise you to have another beer.” Love that guy.))
I tell people that, except I do say it as their doctor. And no, I am not a doctor either.