In a land far, far away…
(The rest is up to you fellow dopers. I need a fairy tale to amuse me.)
I really try to be good but it just isn’t in my nature!
I played this once while doing improv comedy. Let me see…
there lived a charmingly adorable, neurotic girl, who was tired of working full time and taking three credits of college classes at the same time.
lets make it about…um…someone I know…
Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth
There was a prince with a magical sceptre. The sceptre had the power to…
…turn a bad day into a good one- but only once a year. Was this the day to use it? Maybe, since this was the day…
…there lived the real killer of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman…
The Dave-Guy
“since my daughter’s only half-Jewish, can she go in up to her knees?” J.H. Marx
… that his father had decided to step down as King, and allow the Prince to ascend to the throne. Unfortunately, the Prince didn’t want to. He knew that Princes were the ones who had all the fun. Kings had to stay home and govern the country and preside over court cases and direct the military. Too much responsibility for him!
… that he was to marry the ugly princess of the neighboring kingdom to end a war. Using the sceptre, he could resolve the driving force for the war:…
<small>@!#?@! simulposts</small>
So, brandishing his sceptre, the Prince tunred his bad day into a good one by wishing that his father would never die. Pouf! Immediately, his father turned into a ghost, and said “Hamlet, my son…” (yes the prince is called Hamlet)
Disney is going to rip off your story and make you into a lion in 400 years. Watch out. Hamlet, feeling a little heady over the affair, jumped…
[sidenote, just watched Olivier’s Hamlet last night, and am watching Zeferelli’s tonight. Godbless film class…]
Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth
…off the parapet and plunged towards his death, falling at a rate of 9.8 m/s^2. Luckily, since he had invoked the Wand of Good-Day Having, he landed with a soft splash in the crocodile infested moat and recieved only a nice bath(which he had needed desperately anyway). With a smile on his face, the prince headed back towards the castle gates thinking…
Thinking "Gee, I really need to get laid. And a cheese sandwich would be really, really neato; too! (His name was Prince Danny Quail.)
With magic, you can turn a frog into a prince. With science, you can turn a frog into a Ph.D, and you still have the frog you started with.
With that in mind, Prince Doofus went to see about the ugly princess.
“Dad, where’s that chick you wanted me to marry?” “In the foyer,” the king replied. “Take a bag. Or a blindfold.”
The prince headed for the foyer, and there was the princess. She turned, and Prince Doofus was staggered to see…
…that no one was there.
He scratched his head.
“There’s nobody here!”
“Is everyone just playing a trick on me?”
Then in the next room,
He heard a voice that was vile!
It came out with a boom,
And made our Prince choke on his bile!
The voice said, “I’m in here, my lover!”
And recoiling from this sound,
The prince said (prior to seeking some cover)
“I’ll bet that chick weighs 500 pounds!”
Then…
The prince cautiously opened the door. He gasped in surprise to find his princess in bed with his arch nemesis the Orange Duke.
The initial shock abated, and the Prince realizing he had been duped shouted, “Duke L’Orange!”
Just then his stomach growled…
I really try to be good but it just isn’t in my nature!
And then, filled with passion, the prince took out his mighty sceptre and showed it to the princess…
J
“We should have as high a regard for the church so as to keep it out of as many things as possible”
Fluther Good -the Shadow of a Gunman.
Sean O’Casey
And she giggled and said “Um…I think that dip in the cold moat…effected you…”
Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth
…shrinkage…
Yer pal,
Satan