Bibli, sorry about that. I shoulda thought about the tone of my OP a bit more, and put it in there myself. ( Hangs head in shame, offers up cat 'o nine tails, etc. etc. ).
I am sorely tempted. It all comes down to cost. My DSL is just a few dollars more than Dial Up. I deleted my AOL account to save the 23.00 a month, I cannot really justify the added 20.00 a month for Opimum. However, technology being the wonderful thing it IS, I can say this.
I called my local DSL provider the second that Mr. Snotface got out of my ear with his sales pitch. I said, is what this fellah told me true? ( vis a vis speed, etc.). The DSL Tech was straight up with me, which was nice. Yes, it’s true. We then ran the speed test, and whaddya know. My speeds are so far down below what my DSL provider feels I ought to be getting for the fee I’m paying, that he wrote a repair ticket for me. Thursday, they will come and check out the hardware outside, and inside.
I am running 178 download, 88 upload- which is atrocious for DSL. We pulled down my firewall, and removed the router, and the speeds remained the same. Hopefully, I will get increased speed when they come and tweak. I have to say this, the DSL speed is pretty remarkable in of itself. While it is always an exciting thing to sit down at someone’s machine that has such a high rate of access that a media-crammed web page loads immediately, I do enjoy the access I have now.
Besides, I plan to call my local DSL provider back today, and get the Customer Service folks, and play one off the other. If they want to keep me, perhaps they will up my speed for free. 
I am getting the “slowest” DSL rate, guaranteed at 128k up and down. I will ask them to change the filtering so I get 256 k up and down, because I am considering the move to Optimum…we shall see.