There is a famous Canadiana song from the 70’s? by Murray McLachlan that has the line “straw hat and old dirty hankie” in it, talking about a farmer. I also believe there was a farmer who was stalking another famous Canadian, Anne Murray, at some point in the 80’s. Knowing the Barenaked Ladies, I would say this song isn’t creepy so much as it is very much tongue-in-cheek. (This was all from memory, by the way, so don’t quote it as canon.)
What really creeps me out about Clay Aiken’s song “Invisible” is the incorrect grammar. “If I WERE invisible”, dammit!
Wow, that brought back memories. The beginning of that song was really catchy. As I recall the lyrics:
Josie’s on a vacation far away
Come around and talk it over
Her old man thinks that I want her in bed
You know I like my girls a little bit older.
I just wanna use your love tonight
I don’t wanna lose your love tonight.
Not sure who Josie is, but apparently she’s not his girlfriend. So he can hook up if he wants to.
Krokodil, I’ll agree with you that that’s kinda reaching about Daddy’s Hand’s. I always thought the song meant pretty much what it said–Daddy’s love for his family showed in the “callouses and lines” on his hands, and that now she understood that he’d always loved them even though there were times when he had to mete out discipline. Now another one of her songs says something like, “When I say ‘no’ I mean ‘maybe,’ and maybe I mean ‘yes.’” I realize the song was NOT about sex and date rape, but women have fought for a long time to get the message across that “NO means NO!!!” So I didn’t like the message behind that upbeat song.
And I’ll agree with the poster (can’t find the damn post now) who mentioned More Than Words. There’s a Toby Keith song that says something similar–A Little Less Talk and a Lot More Action. I renamed that one Just Shut Up and Screw Me.
How about Bare Naked Ladies’ “I’ll be that Girl.” Pop-y little love song, except whe you actually listen to it, and realize the lead singer has got some wierd Single White Female crush on a lesbian, and hopes that he can get her love by cross-dressing and either committing suicide or killing and replacing her.
I think I can get away with just posting the chorus, and a link to the complete lyrics.
I’ll be that girl - and you would be right over
If I were a field, you would be in clover
If I were the sun, you would be in shadow
And if I had a gun, there’d be no tomorrow
Apologies to the mods if that’s too much of the song.
I’ll also add just about every song performed by Smog, although I don’t think anyone ever mistakes them for anything other than creepy. “Cold Discovery” has the refrain, “I can hold a woman down on a hardwood floor,” although the song never makes it clear exactly why he would do that. Or “Cold Blooded Old Times”, which has the verse,
Mother came rushing in
She said we didn’t see a thing
We said we didn’t see a thing
And father left at eight
Nearly splintering the gate
What?! What didn’t they see? Probably just the lead singer spankin’ it, but you never know…
The song that always creeped me out (and I could never understand why anyone else didn’t seem to see it) was ‘Happy Birthday Sweet Sixteen’ by Neil Sedaka. So, this man has known this girl since she was little and it’s like now she’s sixteen and she’s grown breasts gag, suddenly he’s leering at her and can’t wait to start pawing her. And the way the protaganist talks about her when she was little and innocent and now she’s sexual…it comes over like some kind of peadophile anthem…yuck. Is it just me? I can’t believe everyone thinks that’s an innocent love song!
And talking of annoying grammar in songs, may I just say that every time that I hear ‘Sweet Dreams My LA Ex’ by Rachel Stevens, and the line ‘accuse me of things I never done’ comes up, I go “did! It’s accuse me of things I never did! Agggh!” Alright so ‘did’ wouldn’t rhyme, but that really, really annoys me!
I always thought Just My Imagination by the Temptations was creepy and wondered why people thought a song about a besotted man and his imaginary girlfriend was so romantic.
What about one of the most famous domestic-abuse songs around:
It’s clearly the voice of a desperate woman who is stuck in an abusive relationship; but holds on to her man even though she’s so bruised sometimes she cannot see…
Thank you Marley23! I’ve always held that You are my Sunshine is one of the saddest songs ever and it’s really creepy how they teach that to little kids as a happy song.
My nom is for another Dido song. To me, the lyrics to Here with Me sound like something a ghost would sing. A ghost that does not plan on waiting for her lover to die, but intends to take matters into her own cold hands.
I won’t go
I won’t sleep
I can’t breath
until you’re resting here with me
How about Stephen Stills’s celebration of infidelity, *Love the One You’re With:
And if you can’t be, with the one you love
Love the one you’re with
Don’t be angry, don’t be sad
Don’t sit cryin’ over good times you had
There’s a girl, right next to you
And she’s just waitin’, for something to do
*
I had a friend in middle school whose favorite bands were Anthrax, Iron Maiden, Pantera… and, inexlicably, Klymaxx. I tease him about that to this day. One of their songs had a bit in the middle where hte lead singer said, “Slap me. Please slap me.” Then, a few beats later, “Don’t slap me.” Honestly, I was not of a mind to aquiesce to either request.
I want to say “Obsession”, but I think that’s pretty obviously creepy.
I’ve always thought “Sister Christian” is kind of creepy:
“What’s your price for flight
in finding Mr. Right
You’ll be alright tonight”
Maybe it’s just me, but I always pictured this as the sister in question making a nieve boy think she loves her, when she really only wants people to think she can snag any boy, and will dump the boy when she has no more use for him. Or perhaps I’m reading too much into this.
Come to think of it, the two songs I mentioned, plus “Your Love” and “Dance Hall Days” are all in GTA: Vice City. Hmmmm…
*Baby,
now that I’ve found you
I won’t let you go
I built my world around you
I need you so
Baby even though
You don’t need me,
You don’t need me oh, no
Spent my life looking
for that somebody
to make me feel like new
Now you tell me that you want to leave me
But darling, I just can’t let you*
