Our left eyes suck.

My husband and I just so happened to both have our eye exams today. They were so close together that he left me in the waiting room to drive to his appointment.

Mine wasn’t awful BUT she said I have plaque in my left eye. Just the tip of the iceberg, she said. It means I have plaque either in my heart or carotid arteries which means, if left unchecked, a heart attack or stroke within five years. (I’ve already had a stroke.)

After I got out I wandered over to the Sports Bar in the strip mall (blindly, eyes dilated) to wait for hub. I ordered an innocent tea. Squeezed the lemon wedge and shook in the sweetner.

I don’t want to be “sick” again. I don’t want to be sick anymore. Once again my body has a time bomb in it and I’m tired of the ticking. I ordered a beer.

Electric slide time passed over the speakers. The server watched my booth while I went outside to smoke.
Plaque. Scalp-stuff/smelly-underyour fingernails building a dam in my arteries.

I went back in and ordered a pitcher (of ying ling, BTW. Usually my “reach” is Rolling Rock.) Went to the restroom where I noticed my eyes were glazing with either unshed pitypoor tears or impending drunkness.

While salting another mug the hub came in. “How’d it go,” I asked.

“Okay, except I’ve got a cataract forming in my left eye.”

“Really. I’ve got plaque in mine. I’m going to have a heat attack.”

He sat down in the booth and I poured him a beer. “Bitter,” he said.

“Drink up,” I told him. “It gets better.”

…“So. Anytime soon?”

“Notchet. Yours?”

“Slow-growing.”

We drank our beer, both wishing we could puff away in comfort like in the old days.

“Makes me feel better, tho, that you’ve got a cataract,” I told him, my spirits brightening.

“Yeah?”

“Well, the universe isn’t out to get me. We’re just old.” Never let it be said that I’ve passed up the chance to enjoy company’s misery.

We drank our beer and poured another, commemorating the fact that today we learned that our left eyes suck.

I hate to say it but that somehow made me laugh, I guess the fatalist in me would just have a beer or three as well, I smoke and what do I do when stressed, uh I smoke

Have fun noone gets out of this alive

Cheers

It is funny. Glad you saw it. Of course, we’re going to have to face reality…at some point. But right then it was “raise your mug to the crapshoot of life” time.

Love the post - I thought maybe it was just because I work in ophthalmology, but you also did a great job at the phrasing and storytelling.

You haven’t been flossing it!

Seriously, though, sorry to hear this. I hope they can get you on a treatment soon. Think of it as your left eye trying to help you.

Thanks guys. I’ve since Googled both conditions and it seems neither one is that big a deal. Fairly normal for aging. (Another reason to buy a pitcher.)

Most ophthalmologists seem to consider cataracts expected, these days. Live long enough and it seems like most people will get them eventually. And those little plaque deposits in the blood vessels in the back of the eye (did you have a fluorescein angiogram? IV-fed yellow dye?) are an interesting way to diagnose risks like that. Talk to your regular doctor about it.