On your way to see nellie you can stop by my place for a bit if you like, cats welcome of course. No roof beams but plenty of beds for them to hide under and a drier for them to roost on. Oh, and a closet organizer with a top shelf that might do in a pinch instead of a ceiling beam.
Seriously, you know you can send me a private AAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHH!!! any time.
Awwww!
Hey Beck, first off, don’t be too hard on yourself, it’s a really difficult time.
Second, I’ve had some of that bad shit too, recently. There are coping things you can do that do help (or at least, they helped me). Here’s a suggestion.
Lay a date down – let’s say April 1st. Here’s the thing: on April 1st all of this will be in the rear-view mirror and disappearing into the distance behind you. Keep telling yourself that. No more than a memory of a bad time. So focus on April 1st (for me it was the New Year – but the idea is just the same, it’s a marker to be positive about). What’s early April like in your neck of the woods? Pleasantly warm? Wildflowers in bloom? Weather OK for sitting out on the deck? Sounds great already. Focus on it.
If you’re doing this already, or have already rejected it for whatever reason – sorry to waste your time. If it sounds helpful, I can post or PM a few of the other things I found useful, if you would like.
Look after yourself!
j
I get you. Thanks.
I planted 250 bulbs in November. Red and Yellow tulips. They will bloom around early April. I think when I see them up and blooming my travails will be over. Or I’ll be dead, and my family will see them. Ain’t that romantic?(I know, morbid☺️)
Am I the only one who wants the story of how you can run over your own phone???
I have heard that if unwanted wildlife dines on planted flower bulbs, it helps to dunk the bulbs in hot sauce before planting!
evil, evil grin
~VOW
Come on up in time for the St. Paul Winter Carnival and test your mettle for cold. Actually, it’s been a relatively warm winter so far, but we keep getting warned that winter is coming.
The lil’wrekker ran over her phone by accidentally leaving it on top of her car. She says she saw it slide off as she backed out and her crunch as her wheel went over it. This is why I bought insurance. Crap happens.
Her new phone is already in her hands.
I’m an WASPy Canadian and therefore supposed to be rather reserved and polite and unobtrusive, but BIG HUGS to you, Beck, and a reminder that you’ve piled up tons of good karma and so can afford to spend a little by not being perfect in this tough time. You have a lot going on and it’s okay to let others around you know it ain’t business as usual.
Plus, more hugs.
Thank you. Hugs are always welcomed.
I’m feeling tons better, athough tired. I go to the clinic tomorrow and get more drugs pumped in. I’m hoping to perk up to a good place.
And…wait for it…the Big Wrek apologized to me. He kinda got woke a little bit.
OK, I can sympathize with Li’l Wrekker. Once when I lived in Massachusetts, a car pulled abreast of me on the highway and honked an pointed to my car’s roof. When I’d stopped for gas, I’d left my handbag up there. And oh, the places my cell phones have died. I’m still convinced there’s a mountain goat in Wyoming who has my phone nestled somewhere in one of his stomachs.
I’m a little late to this party, but I’ll just say that you might want to give a blanket apology to your nearest and dearest. Yes, in many cases they may deserve whatever you’re dishing out, but if this is unlike you, you may actually feel better if you just (before anything else happens, not after) say to your family, " I’m sorry if I’m acting snappy. I’m taking my nerves out on you, and that’s not fair. Please bear with me, because I love you."
This should make you feel better, and make them worry less. And remember, sometimes they DO deserve it.
StG
Hugs Beck. The new year has been crappy here too. This too shall pass.
I have apologized to all parties. We’re good.
The whole family is under stress.
My big concern, of course is the lil’wrekker. I just can’t have her so worried that her college work suffers. She’s done so well. She doesn’t need to worry about her ol’ Ma.
Hey, you guys have been so nice. I appreciate your kind words and advice. If one person tells me online friends are not real friends I may just kick them. This is a real community of real people. I love it here.
I love all you guys.
Thank you again.
Beck, I’m so sorry you’re going through all this! I think the emotional rollercoaster is totally normal. I’m glad you’ve apologized to your fam, but maybe you could ask your care team if there’s a counselor you could see, even if it’s just once or twice? This may happen again and it would be good for you to have some coping tools.
As for your daughter in college, I’ve been in that situation. What she should do is to go to her profs and tell them what’s going on. Tell them that she’s going to do her very best to do all that’s required, but she may need an extended due date here or there. Just stay in contact. Don’t get behind and give up without talking to them. My profs were all great when I was going through stuff. She may want to get some counseling through her university, too.
ETA: She should talk to her advisor(s), as well. Mine were helpful not only with class-related things, but they gave me emotional support, too. Maybe she could withdraw from one class to lighten her load a bit? Just this term?
Thanks, Helena. We have a meeting with the Surgical team next week. They want as many of the immediate family as can be there to come. I’ve been offered counselling. I may take them up on it.
I’ll be sure and talk to the lil’wrekker about all this when she’s home this weekend.
My ever diligent DIL is keeping me in line. I really don’t know what I’d do without her. She’s a treasure.
Beck, you would always be welcome here. My house is a mess, but the guest room is pretty clean. And, I have cats.
Regardless, be well, think positively, and know that you have friends. I hope that I am one of them.
Yeah, but do you have bears?
Any bear sightings recently, Beck?
StG
It seems Mr. Bear is sleeping one off. When spring gets here, look out!
Hugs to you, Beck, and don’t be so hard on yourself.