Papa John claims health care reform is too expensive

[Askthepizzaguy]

I’m genuinely surprised by the positive feedback.

Any time I put some effort into a post I’m usually greeted with a parade of TL;DR by someone who felt it was absolutely necessary to let the entire thread know that they have the attention span of a tsetse fly.

It gets me discouraged. But then I haven’t posted on the Dope for a long while, so maybe it’s just the other forums. Thanks for the responses.
Oh, if I may, since I have some heads turned, here are 10 little bits of info related to drivers and tipping… May I?

[spoiler]1) 4 bucks an hour plus a dollar per delivery run is still not 8 dollars. 4 dollars of that is gasoline. I already spent it before I came to work, filling the tank ahead of time to ensure your food wasn’t late due to stopping for gas. I literally never saw that money. I invested it and *eventually *got repaid.

2. One dollar per run tip would make it minimum wage. That’s all. A dollar tip. Every little bit helps.

3. In my neighborhood, the percentage of people who do not tip anything at all is** 65%-70%.**

4. If you tip two dollars, you’re paying for one person who did not tip at all. Every dollar pays for one cheap customer.

5. Customers who tip more than that end up paying me 80% of my total tipping income and I remember each one of their names and where they live and I always do my very best to serve them. **They **are the reason I delivered when I did, because the 60% of customers who tipped nothing were simply a burden on my time and prevented me from earning money.

6. Thank you. I realize how annoying it is to pay all this extra, and how it’s not included in the price of the meal. Especially when they rip you off for the meal itself. Tipping is an absolutely stupid way of paying someone for their time. It’s the stupidest way to pay someone, and yet, it’s still better than not paying them. So I thank you ever so much for remembering to tip me when I delivered, and now, I thank you very much for tipping my drivers. These are hard working folks who, many of them, lost their better paying jobs in the down economy. This is what they have that is keeping them from being completely unemployed. Under-employed is the word for it. Thank you for helping them out. They have families and kids, and they used to live on more money than we could ever afford to pay them directly. They have to make ends meet. The tip is the only way they can. Ask your driver about the very best deals the company has to offer. There’s usually coupons attached to the box, but he can also tell you if you didn’t know, for example, which day of the week the wings are always on sale, which day of the week is two for one pizza day, etc. You’ll get your tip back and thensome in savings, if you know where to look.

7. How much is a good minimum tip: I’ll take whatever you have, as long as it’s not coins, or if it is coins, they add up to more than a dollar. That’s not enough, but 10 bucks a night from the dollar-tippers ends up being 1/3 of what I need to make. That’s more than zero.

8. Remember- the driver doesn’t carry more than 20 dollars on him because we get robbed at gunpoint. Several drivers got robbed in my store last year. I personally had my car stolen from me. If you can only pay with a 50, that’s because you didn’t think to break it into smaller bills. I cannot carry vast amounts of money on me because I can lose my job if I do. It’s against company policy because people end up dead because they carried too much change. It’s not worth a life to break your bill for you. Please expect only a sane amount of change, otherwise we cannot make the exchange at all, and it is not our fault.

9. If you leave the “tip” part of a credit card slip blank, you invite credit card fraud. Write “Cash” and the total on the line where you’re supposed to write the total, even if you choose not to tip us. I hate cheapskates, but I hate drivers who give us a bad name even more. Screw those guys. I’d rather earn no tip honestly than get ten dollars illegally and dishonestly from a person whose only crime is being selfish, and although such instances of fraud instantly cost such a driver their job, it still happens once in a blue moon. You can prevent it, just write CASH. It takes two seconds of your time and it protects your money. Don’t want to tip me, that’s your business. Don’t get cheated.

10. If it is raining, or snowing, the inside of my car is trashed, and my clothes are soaked to the skin, and my car may not have a working heater. Most of us have to drive cars where the maintenance is focused on things like keeping the engine running, we can’t afford to fix the heater. Please give generously in bad weather, or consider getting it yourself… you know you don’t want to make the trip in such nasty and dangerous weather, so go ahead and be nice to the driver. You might be the only reason he can afford to eat a hot meal that night. Remember, these big chains give their own employees 20% discount on pizzas, not free pizzas. That’s 8 bucks and change after taxes. I can’t even afford to eat here with my employee discount. Help me have a nice meal tonight after everything I’ve been through.[/spoiler]

[Ludovic]

@pulykamell

IPTSOA?

“I put that s*** on everything”, the unofficial slogan of Frank’s Hot Sauce. I shortened it to IPTSOA as a humorous reference to the shortened PBUH (Peace Be Upon Him) that people sometimes use for Muhammed because I was being sacreligious by preferring Papa John’s to Frank’s. ERR, that should be IPTSOE. I can see where you got confused

[John_Mace]

Have you ever spit on anyone’s pizza?

[spoiler] Just kidding!! I totally get the tip thing, and endorse your rules heartily.

If you’re really a pizza delivery guy, and don’t like it, you should consider a career involving writing. You do it well.[/spoiler]

[Colophon]

Seriously, what is it with American fast-food bosses and ill-thought-out political statements? Any day now I expect a zombie Colonel Sanders to burst from the grave and hold forth on fracking, or General Petraeus’s affair or something.

Oh, and that:

@Eliahna

Is that the guy from the Madonna song?

was excellent.

[black_rabbit]

@John_Mace

If you’re really a pizza delivery guy, and don’t like it, you should consider a career involving writing. You do it well.

Hey, he’s pulling down thirty bucks a day. Most freelancers are lucky to make that in a week.

[Snowboarder_Bo]

Excellent posts, Askthepizzaguy.

When I order pizza, I always tip the driver generously, for two reasons: 1) Pizza is Nature’s most perfect food, and I love it and b) I know that most pizza delivery people aren’t well paid and I love them for bringing me pizza.

Oh, and the Papa John’s guy can suck it. Their pizza is craptastic.

[Chimera]

Askthepizzaguy, I’d love to see that published.

[Doughbag]

Jeppers, that’s a sorry excuse from a rich guy, being afraid of missing one pebble in his front yard… nothing more, make him pay

[kayaker]

Papa John’s Faces $250 Million Spam Lawsuit

[Furious_Marmot]

@Askthepizzaguy

They pay me just over 4 bucks an hour on the road. Add payroll taxes to that and call it 5 dollars.

…

They used to pay drivers minimum wage. 7 bucks an hour plus gasoline plus customer’s tips. Our wages have been cut in half in the last decade. We used to get more in tips, before they started turning the delivery fee from a dollar fee for gas to a profit-delivery device for themselves.

EDIT, hit the button too soon, will repost later

[Budget_Player_Cadet]

PizzaGuy, send that shit to Daily Kos. Not because I wouldn’t want to see it here, not because it’s bad or wrong or anything, but because signal boost. Jesus that’s a good post. On a conservative forum I frequent from time to time, there’s been a lot of hullabaloo about the statements of this guy… That is some great perspective you offer.

[Anaamika]

Askthepizzaguy, I want to read what you have to say. Can you maybe not put it in spoilers? The place I’m reading it, I don’t have the ability to click on the little “view spoiler” button and the only way to read it is to click the quote button.

Do you think you could maybe repost it in the actual thread?

[Furious_Marmot]

@Askthepizzaguy

They pay me just over 4 bucks an hour on the road. Add payroll taxes to that and call it 5 dollars.

They used to pay drivers minimum wage. 7 bucks an hour plus gasoline plus customer’s tips. Our wages have been cut in half in the last decade. We used to get more in tips, before they started turning the delivery fee from a dollar fee for gas to a profit-delivery device for themselves.

What the fuck? When did that shit start? Is it nationwide, or specific to your franchise(s). And the other big chains are doing it too? That is a goddamn travesty.

I worked for the Hut from 95-03; during that time minimum wage ranged from 4.35(?)-5.15, I made 5.50-7.25 +.65-.75 per delivery and we were always paid at the full rate, regardless of whether we were on the road or washing dishes. There was no extra delivery charge to confuse the customer and gas was a whole lot cheaper. We were also offered crappy health insurance through the company, which didn’t cover much but didn’t cost much either.

If they had tried to pull that shit with us, they would have had to recruit hobos on bicycles, because we’d have all quit to go work at Starbucks or something. The peanuts they are giving you guys in no way makes up for the late hours, car maintainence, general filth, and ever-present threat of death by gun or traffic accident.

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

@Anaamika

Askthepizzaguy, I want to read what you have to say. Can you maybe not put it in spoilers? The place I’m reading it, I don’t have the ability to click on the little “view spoiler” button and the only way to read it is to click the quote button.

Do you think you could maybe repost it in the actual thread?

Here you go.

@Askthepizzaguy

1. 4 bucks an hour plus a dollar per delivery run is still not 8 dollars. 4 dollars of that is gasoline. I already spent it before I came to work, filling the tank ahead of time to ensure your food wasn’t late due to stopping for gas. I literally never saw that money. I invested it and *eventually *got repaid.

2. One dollar per run tip would make it minimum wage. That’s all. A dollar tip. Every little bit helps.

3. In my neighborhood, the percentage of people who do not tip anything at all is** 65%-70%.**

4. If you tip two dollars, you’re paying for one person who did not tip at all. Every dollar pays for one cheap customer.

5. Customers who tip more than that end up paying me 80% of my total tipping income and I remember each one of their names and where they live and I always do my very best to serve them. **They **are the reason I delivered when I did, because the 60% of customers who tipped nothing were simply a burden on my time and prevented me from earning money.

6. Thank you. I realize how annoying it is to pay all this extra, and how it’s not included in the price of the meal. Especially when they rip you off for the meal itself. Tipping is an absolutely stupid way of paying someone for their time. It’s the stupidest way to pay someone, and yet, it’s still better than not paying them. So I thank you ever so much for remembering to tip me when I delivered, and now, I thank you very much for tipping my drivers. These are hard working folks who, many of them, lost their better paying jobs in the down economy. This is what they have that is keeping them from being completely unemployed. Under-employed is the word for it. Thank you for helping them out. They have families and kids, and they used to live on more money than we could ever afford to pay them directly. They have to make ends meet. The tip is the only way they can. Ask your driver about the very best deals the company has to offer. There’s usually coupons attached to the box, but he can also tell you if you didn’t know, for example, which day of the week the wings are always on sale, which day of the week is two for one pizza day, etc. You’ll get your tip back and thensome in savings, if you know where to look.

7. How much is a good minimum tip: I’ll take whatever you have, as long as it’s not coins, or if it is coins, they add up to more than a dollar. That’s not enough, but 10 bucks a night from the dollar-tippers ends up being 1/3 of what I need to make. That’s more than zero.

8. Remember- the driver doesn’t carry more than 20 dollars on him because we get robbed at gunpoint. Several drivers got robbed in my store last year. I personally had my car stolen from me. If you can only pay with a 50, that’s because you didn’t think to break it into smaller bills. I cannot carry vast amounts of money on me because I can lose my job if I do. It’s against company policy because people end up dead because they carried too much change. It’s not worth a life to break your bill for you. Please expect only a sane amount of change, otherwise we cannot make the exchange at all, and it is not our fault.

9. If you leave the “tip” part of a credit card slip blank, you invite credit card fraud. Write “Cash” and the total on the line where you’re supposed to write the total, even if you choose not to tip us. I hate cheapskates, but I hate drivers who give us a bad name even more. Screw those guys. I’d rather earn no tip honestly than get ten dollars illegally and dishonestly from a person whose only crime is being selfish, and although such instances of fraud instantly cost such a driver their job, it still happens once in a blue moon. You can prevent it, just write CASH. It takes two seconds of your time and it protects your money. Don’t want to tip me, that’s your business. Don’t get cheated.

10. If it is raining, or snowing, the inside of my car is trashed, and my clothes are soaked to the skin, and my car may not have a working heater. Most of us have to drive cars where the maintenance is focused on things like keeping the engine running, we can’t afford to fix the heater. Please give generously in bad weather, or consider getting it yourself… you know you don’t want to make the trip in such nasty and dangerous weather, so go ahead and be nice to the driver. You might be the only reason he can afford to eat a hot meal that night. Remember, these big chains give their own employees 20% discount on pizzas, not free pizzas. That’s 8 bucks and change after taxes. I can’t even afford to eat here with my employee discount. Help me have a nice meal tonight after everything I’ve been through.

[Anaamika]

Oh, my! Thank you!

[Budget_Player_Cadet]

Here’s the other, first one: [U][B]Profitability:[/B][/U]Pizza chains sell two-liter bottles of soda for - Pastebin.com

Alternatively, you could have just pressed “quote” on his post.

[Rachellelogram]

Wow, there are seriously people who think the delivery fee is a tip? I’ve always tipped my pizza guys $4-$5 on a single order of $18-20, and I was concerned that wasn’t enough.

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

Why wouldn’t they? The delivery doesn’t cost the store more than it used to; the fee was instituted to offset rising produce costs.

[Inner_Stickler]

@Askthepizzaguy

I’m genuinely surprised by the positive feedback.

That’s because you usually post in mafia threads where we think you’re a lying scumbag trying to snow us with a mountain of words.

Inner Stickler (Proud 20% Tipper on all deliveries)

[grayhairedmomma]

I have to admit, that until I read Askthepizzaguy’s post, I did believe that the delivery fee went to the driver to cover people who don’t give tips (kind of like a mandatory tip on a large party in a restaurant). I have always tipped the driver about 10-15% on top of that fee.

I think that fee is bullshit now, because it should be going to the driver. I also had no idea that the drivers are not earning minimum wage. That’s crazy.