Parents: Do you require your kids to read on their own?

In My Humble Opinion
1

We strongly encourage reading for our ten-year old. At first, our approach was all wrong. We selected almost all his reading material once he was old enough to stop reading picture books. We had him read the ‘classics’ (The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Treasure Island, some of the Narnia series, A Christmas Carol, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, The Count of Montecristo). He also read short biographies about Harriet Tubman, Frederick Douglass, Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Queen Elizabeth I, Marco Polo, W.E.B. Dubois, Rosa Parks and Thomas Jefferson. Boy, did he hate reading! In retrospect, requiring him to write reports (usually just a few sentences) and identify vocabulary words from the material probably didn’t help matters.

We switched gears last year and allowed him to select his own books. So far he’s read Tony Hawk’s autobiography, Just Stupid, The Day My Butt Went Psycho!, The Bad Beginning, some non-fiction science books (astronomy, biology, chemistry, anatomy), a book about Denmark, a book about Spain, books about Egpytian mummies and two or three Judy Moody books. He’s much happier and actually makes time to read. Whenever he has a question about how something works, a country or the history of something, we head over to bn.com or amazon.com, find a book about it and order it. He’s learned so much! Of course, he’d still rather play a video game or go outside than read, but kids will be kids.

We’ve learned our lesson and will take this approach with the others. Our younger boys are a little too young to read independently, so they still gather around for story time. Story time is a few times during the day (dad’s home most of the time during the day) and at least once in the evening when I get home. We read and discuss the story and pictures and then draw pictures or make puppets out of paper lunch bags based on the book.

This thread was inspired by one in MPSIMS about an eleven-year old who received gift cards that totaled over $250. In it, the parent says his/her kid isn’t ‘into books’. I tried forever to wrap my mind around an eleven-year old kid not being into books and it just didn’t work. My thread was also inspired by a thread DeVena posted a few weeks (months?) back about book suggestions for her niece and nephew as their parents don’t buy them books (!!!).

I don’t know for how long we can require our oldest to read. Our goal is to establish good reading habits now so they’ll be interested in reading later in life. We realize now our initial approach was counter-productive. Our ten-year old enjoys reading now that it isn’t a chore so I guess we didn’t inflict too much damage. I’m sure once he becomes a teenager we’ll no longer be able to require him to read. We hope, of course, he’ll continue to read independent of his school-assigned reading, assuming he’ll have time (I don’t remember that I had that kind of time in high school).

The following questions are for parents of children ages seven through thirteen. Parents of older children, feel free to tell me what you did when your kids were younger and how it worked out for you and them. Parents of younger children, feel free to post what your plan to do. If you have no kids, feel free to post about your childhood reading requirements (or lack thereof) and how it worked out for you.

Do you require your kids to read? Did you/will you require them to read ‘the classics’? Do you let them select their own books? Do they like reading? Do you have to remind them to read or will they read on their own? If your kids don’t read, what do they do when they’re not outside playing?

2

Well, I never needed to “require” my children to read. They saw me and Ivylad reading, and when they were old enough to read on their own, they picked it up automatically. For me, reading is fun. (Requiring book reports? Yikes! I’m glad you backed off that.)

Ivygirl sometimes gets in trouble for reading during math class. For me, the best thing to do was to take them to the library. They’d run off and get what they wanted, and I picked out my books. I did steer them a bit toward certain books, just to encourage them to try them. If the books were not their cup of tea I dropped it.

There is no “required” reading at our house. They both fight over the Reader’s Digest, and I make them read part of the paper before they grab the comics, but other than that I don’t keep an eye on it. They’ve developed a passion for reading on their own.

I don’t require they read “classics.” They’ve both read Watership Down, but I think that was a little over their heads at the time they’ve read it. My son has read Tom Sawyer and some of the Jack London books. They’ve both devoured the Harry Potter books (as have I ;)) and my son is into Tom Clancy and Michael Crichton, while Ivygirl leans toward the Babysitter Club books.

I would suggest the library, and as a treat, allow them to stay up an extra half hour as long as they read in bed. Make it fun, and soon it will be a vital part of their life.

3

I come from a family of readers on my mom’s side – so much that, one time, I was grounded from books as an experiment. And don’t have a heart attack, I think it lasted about twelve hours before I was caught reading again. So much for that experiment; reading is sort of like breathing for me, not something optional that can be taken away.

I would think a combination of reading a lot, visibly would be the most effective tactic with most, combined with not forcing books at the kids. After all, if Mom and Dad constantly have their noses in books, there must be something interesting there, right? Also, my reading was lightly censored at the most (I don’t remember being told I couldn’t read a book, but I’m sure it happened on at least a couple of occasions) and completely uncensored after my early teens. (Book reports? Aaack! I’m glad you realized how counterproductive that was!)

Don’t think kids are necessarily too young to read, either; if they’re ready and interested, age doesn’t matter. I’m an oddball, seeing as nobody taught me to read but I was reading by four and a half (possibly earlier, but nobody knew until then). I know some kids aren’t really ready until sixish, but if they’re motivated, seeing reading as something fun and interesting and desirable, they’ll get it fast once they’re ready to get it. Heh heh heh.

4

My daughters’ (age 12 and 10) school recently implemented a book a month reading program. Some books are classics but most are contemporary novels such as “Holes.” This helped kick start my youngest daughter’s reading appetite because she hadn’t really been into books prior to the reading program and I didn’t force the issue. She will now read on her own without being asked. My older daughter always liked to read on her own.

The last two or three years, we’ve been going to the Half Price Bookstore every three months or so. I’ll usually give them $10 to spend. When we first started going, my youngest daughter only picked out easy cartoonish books (e.g. Captain Underpants) but has slowly graduated to the Babysitter’s Club books. My older daughter is now reading the Pendragon series. They really do look forward to going and there have been times when I’ve caught them “sneaking” and reading past their bedtime. (I guess that’s a good problem to have.)

As far as requiring them to read, I do require them to read a chapter of their Book-A-Month books every week night. The rest of the month, I set aside occasional “No Electronics” times where we turn off the t.v/computer and videogames. Sometimes we play a game of “Life” as a family. And sometimes we light a fire and all read for an hour. But I don’t force them to read. It’s simply one option. I do think that kids tend to emulate their parents. So if you want your child to read on his/her own, then he should see you reading on your own.

5

We’ve had story time before bed pretty much since they could sit up by themselves. We also try to challenge them a bit with the things we read–we started my daughter on Twain, Dickens, and Kipling by the time she was 3 or 4. She is very verbal and was talking a blue streak by 15 months. She is seven now, and reads on her own all the time. She has been through all the Harry Potters and several of the Redwall series among many other “big kid” books. She’s even tackled a few Sherlock Holmes stories. (She was going through some of those lightweight mystery series that are popular now like popcorn, so I thought I’d give SH a shot.)

My 5-year-old son is very active, but will sit for hours listening to a story. He has especially like Roald Dahl and, right now, The Phantom Toll Booth. I don’t think he’ll drop the habit once learns to read on his own. He’s surrounded by books, there’s no TV at home, and everybody else is reading, what else is there to do. :slight_smile:

We buy them “classic” stuff for gifts and make suggestions, but they seem to like it. They get to choose their own books from the library, and sometimes from the bookstore, too. Naturally some parts of the more advanced books are beyond them, but that’s how you learn.

6

Well, fortunately my daughter loves books. She doesn’t read yet, but since she is not yet 2, I will give her some time.

My English teacher designated her Friday class as a reading period. For all but the most advanced class of juniors and seniors, she requred that her students read something not for any class. Once class period a week dedicated to pleasure reading. She felt that if you were in advanced English as a senior or junior, you probably had developed a love of reading and so you could read required stuff then.

I do think that it is a good idea to require your teen to read some. You likely won’t need to though, reading is a hard habit to break. You may want to show fairness by requiring of them no more reading than you can find time for, or even take turns picking a book and both of you read it at the same time. (WARNING: get separate copies to read at the same time if you do to preserve civility.) Sometimes it is nice to share quiet time reading near friends and family who are reading too.

7

My parents never forced me to read anything, much less selecting books for me or requiring book reports. Nor did they censor my reading material - I read the Straight Dope books far too young. I’m someone else who was punished by not being allowed to read before bedtime. It was the worst punishment I remember being given.

I think I must have just picked it up from my parents. We always went to the library, book stores etc. I can’t imagine making it required would have helped at all.

8

I always buy my nieces and nephews a book and a toy for Christmas. I try to choose books I liked at their age or books of a type they already are fond of. They seem to enjoy them.

9

My husband and read a lot. We always have. I used to get in trouble for reading my books in school, too. So did he.

When we’re both reading after the youngest kids have gone to sleep, my ten-year old will still ask to play his Gameboy or Playstation 2 games. We usually just ask him if he’s read today and he’ll go off and read whatever book he’s into at the time.

You know, Readers’ Digest is a good idea. When I’m between books and have to take the train to DC, I always pick up a RD. I liked reading them as a kid. I think I’ll subscribe. Thanks!

As a child, I wasn’t allowed to watch much TV. I had to read all the time. I had to write reports for my Mom on a weekly basis. Don’t get me wrong, I loved reading. I remember what a treat it was being able to pick out my own books from the library (as opposed to the ones she assigned me). My husband, on the other hand, was allowed to read whatever he wanted – including comic books. He, too, loved reading and still does. We’re both avid readers, we just arrived here via different paths.

10

I only have small children, but I do have a few suggestions. Here are some ideas from a presentation I did a couple of years ago; this part was about helping a reluctant reader learn to enjoy reading. They are paraphrased from a book, which I can’t remember the title of, but I’ll try to find out and post it.

How do I get my kid to read? He hates reading!

–Fill your house with comics and magazines that are interesting to your kid. There are magazines for every interest. Move on to newspapers and books.

–Have easy, interesting books around. Series, junky books—it doesn’t matter—series are good because if you like one, you’ll like them all, and kids like the safety in that. Put reading material where your kid is: the kitchen, the table, by the couch. Be sneaky; forbid snacks except at the table (claim that ants are arriving in the living room) and then put books there!

–Let your kid pick the books. No assigned reading lists allowed, especially in summer.

–Remember that you want your kid to have a lifelong habit of enjoying reading, and as long as she’s enjoying herself, it’s fine. Don’t force.

–Make sure he has long, uninterrupted blocks of time to read in, and that lying around reading a magazine or book is not considered lazy or time-wasting.

–Worried about what your kid is reading? Read it too, and now you have a new topic of conversation.
As for my own family, we keep books around all the time and read a lot. It worked for my parents, anyway. I plan to homeschool, so we will have required reading for that, but we’ll also have reading time where anything is allowed. I was a classics-hater as a child, btw, and I survived–I’ve even read them all now and am a librarian too.

Oh, and some websites–I have more if anyone cares:
http://www.planetesme.com/ I really don’t like the format, but she does have great ideas about reading and a good list of websites. You might want to read the book instead.
http://www.kidsreads.com/ Great new books, fun ideas, interviews, info on popular series.

11

I sort of did. My kids are now 17 and 18 years old. When they were younger they both had some problems with reading – neither enjoyed it much and both would always do something else if there was a choice. So, when they were 7 and 8, I instituted ‘reading hour.’ Now I should say that my kids always had a very early bedtime – when reading hour started, their bedtime was 7:30. I increased their bedtime to 8:30, with the stipulation that the extra hour be spent reading in bed. This continued until they were 12 and 13, with the bedtime increasing, of course. The extra reading practice really improved their reading skills and their enjoyment in reading – both of these improvements were noticable pretty quickly, too. Within 2 school years, my daughter (who is disabled with CP and had some non-specified learning disorders that kept her in Special Ed resource classes for a number of years) was out of Special Ed for reading. Within 3 years she was one of the top readers in her mainstream class. Doe was completely mainstreamed academically by the 4th grade and hasn’t received less than a B in any class since the 5th grade. She is in the 11th grade now and attends a charter school for the Literary Arts. She had to audition for a spot in this school (write and present an essay) My son hasn’t done as well academically, but he loves to read even more than Doe does – he reads (like me) for the pleasure of it. Nick is in boot camp (Navy) right now, and told me (when he called over Christmas) that he’s dying for something to read.

I never required them to read the classics or anything else. In the early days of reading hour, they were required to read books, not magazines or comics, for at least 1/2 of reading hour, but they could always choose their own books. Later, once they were firm readers, I relaxed this restriction. Nick, especially, likes non-fiction, so he reads a lot of magazines – he’s one of those guys with ‘passions,’ when he was going through his Civil War phase he liked history magazines. Nowadays he’s addicted to weightlifting and boxing magazines, which he reads cover-to-cover. They both ended up reading a lot of things I chose, though. I have a large home library and both of them would choose something off my shelves if they didn’t have a book. Also, I’ve aways gone to the public library once a week, and I used to bring things home for them, although I didn’t require them to read them if they weren’t interested. Right up until he left home, my son would ask me to 'bring [him] something" if I was on my way to the library. Doe is more likely to pick things out herself – she spends several periods a week in her school library (she takes study hall instead of PE because of her disability).

12

Forgot to mention – I never made them do book reports, but I did always talk to them about what they were reading. Still do – especially with Nick, who will often read something and then give it to me to read (because he wants to discuss it). I have required a research report from them, though, as punishment. For instance, when I caught Nick using diuretics to cut weight for wrestling, I made him research and write a report on eating disorders.

13

Hee - we used to joke that my punishment was being sent outside to play, since as long as I had a book, sending me to my room didn’t work.

We didn’t have required reading, but both my parents are bookworms. What Mom did when we were old enough, like, say, when we read the “Little House” books, was that we’d read 2 chapters before bed - she’d read one aloud, and I’d read one aloud. I get twitchy if I’m in a quiet setting without a book around. When Dad and I went to London in August, I carried a huge tote and he took his carry-on everywhere so we’d be sure to have a book on us for bus/train/Tube rides. In fact, the reason he wanted to take me to London was that when I was in the 2nd grade, I read a book that took place during the Great Fire of the 1660’s, and always said I wanted to see London bridge.

I’m not sure if they did that kind of thing with my brother; I do know he’s not the big reader the rest of us are, although he enjoys the occasional true crime book (he’s a cop).

14

My kids aren’t as crazy about reading as I’d like them to be, but I do keep on working at getting them interested. They seem to go through cycles when they really enjoy it for a time, then lose interest, etc.
One of the most effective things I have done with them is to listen to audio books in the car. They get hooked in spite of themselves (and we’re all crazy about the Lemony Snicket stuff).
I also read aloud at night even though they are old enough to read for themselves. They both have permission to read absolutely anything they wish. (That one might break down if they had access to porn or something. :slight_smile: ) Also, I go to the library at least two or three times a week. We all have our own cards and the librarians know us by name. (“Here come those damned Beetles” most likely.) If they don’t check out books, they have to trail after me and be bored.

15

One more website I forgot: My home library. The best part is the loads of downloadable bookplate images by lots of illustrators–I like to print a page of 4-6 to stick in book presents for other kids. There’s a bookplate for every taste! And also reviews and stuff.

16

I find the concept of “Required reading” for kids kind of strange. If you encourage them to read and provide books, they usually will. I know I did. Nor do I remember being told WHAT books to read.

I think it also helped that my books were my books. My parents would buy me books, not just have books on the shelf. Having books around that you have a sense of ownership over makes you want to read them.

One phenomenon - I’m getting away from the OP here but oh well - that I think might be biting into some kids’ opportunity to read is the current trend towards virtually endless structured activity. I have a neice and nephew who have some reading issues; the neice is OK, but the nephew apparently isn’t much of a reader. The thing is, they’re both in hockey, dance, swimming, scouts, this, that and the other thing pretty much every night of the week and most weekends. If the kids’ working double time hours, it’s going to be hard for her/him to find quiet time for reading.

When I was a kid, I was in very few structured activities; baseball, scouts for a few years, and that was about it. I had to fill my own time, and there’s no easier way than just grabbing a book.

17

One thing I do that’s kind of sneaky: I let them stay up later if they read. Let’s say bedtime is 8:00. At 8:00, I’ll say it’s time for bed. They groan, “Can’t we stay up a little longer?” I say, “Well, the TV is off, no games, no computer time, but if you want to read for a little while then it’s okay.” Works every time.

Also, we still read or tell stories to both kids. Right now we’re going through Narnia, which both kids like, and The Hobbit, which is more to the boy’s taste. So last night I told him if he wanted to hear more than one page he’d better be ready for bed early. When his teeth were brushed and pajamas on we read through about ten pages. He’s only six, but could read it on his own, yet sometimes it’s just nice to read to him. It doesn’t hurt that I enjoy the story.

18

Good point, RickJay. I forgot to mention that I’m very big on giving books as gifts. (To all kids, not just my own. I plan to be known as the crazy book aunt.)

19

Just getting them ready for the adult world. wistful sigh

In many of the “what do you miss about being a kid,” or “would you want to be a kid again” threads, I’ve popped in to say, NOTHING and NO WAY, respectively. When I was a kid, all I wanted to do was grow up, and I do not look back on childhood with much nostaglia. The sole exception is that as I kid I could read and read and read and read. I was a bright kid, and I didn’t have to spend that much time doing homework. I got into the habit of doing it right after supper time, so I’d read all afternoon, have dinner, and read until bedtime. Weekends? Time to read. And oh, sweet, sweet, summer vaction . . . THREE MONTHS TO READ.

I can barely remember what that was like.

20

I never had to require reading for my boys, who are now nearly 14 and 18.

My older son started reading books well above his recommended age level in 3rd grade, my younger one took a little longer to catch the reading bug, but he seems to be absorbed in quite a few lately. I read to them as children, starting around 2 or younger, every night, and they grew up seeing me reading.

Reading has actually been something of a hindrance to my older son’s academic success. He never had acceptable grades, and for years was not doing what he needed to. If I punished him, he was completely unphased, because punishment meant he’d have to sit in his room and read, which is what he would have done anyway. I’ve actually had to take his ‘pleasure’ reading books away during homework time. Recently his computer teacher sent a note home saying he was not participating in class, but was instead reading. Rarely do I see him without a book in his hand to tote along wherever he is going, and he is constantly providing reviews of whatever he just finished to my younger son, my husband, myself, or just about anyone that will listen.

I have recommended classics, and they have read some of my recommendations, though not all of them, and I’m fine with that. Since they both enjoy reading, they each have a pretty good idea of the books they want. My younger son does tend to read a lot of the books his older brother has finished and recommended to him.