What a tragedy. :rolleyes:
So what’s the problem? He’s funny, nice, pleasant, holds a job, and keeps his grades up. He’s 19. Why can’t he play videogames during his free time? What would you rather he did?
He is 19 and he should be able to do whatever he wants but anything can be done to an excess. I would like him to have friends, date, get a little exercise, go out once in a while.
It’s not just that he plays a lot he plays every waking minute that he doesn’t absolutely have to do anything else. He is addicted to video games. If something happens and he can’t play he doesn’t know what to do with himself. If he doesn’t have school or work he will play nonstop from the minute he gets up to the minute he goes to bed. I think it’s sad because he is such a cool person and he’s missing out on a lot of things he would enjoy doing but he doesn’t do them because he’s playing video games.
He’s almost 20 and has made no new friends since high school. His high school friends are all having new experiences and he’s not.
I just want more for him.
Yes, it is. Would you really want one of your children to essentially be a friendless recluse who hardly leaves the house and can barely even take time out from one activity to even eat?
Hes missing out on things you think he might enjoy by doing something he enjoys? I used to be that guy, i would go out once in a while because people kept bothering me non stop with the same reasons you give. I didn’t have fun, it just wasn’t enjoyable for me in the least. Some people are just not very social, you should be happy hes found something he enjoys. You said it hasn’t interfered with his grades or with his job, if hes managing to do fine in both and still find time to do something he enjoys you should be happy for him.
DigitalC You say you used to be that guy. My worry is that he will never stop being that guy. While it might be OK to play video games all the time at 19 it wouldn’t be OK to for his entire life.
When he does very occasionally go out he has a great time. It’s not like I want him to do things he doesn’t like, I want him to do some of the other things he does like.
Yeah! He should be spending the best part of his life sitting in front of a book and reading it! Plenty of exercise and social interaction happens that way! Or wait, wait, I’ve got it! The Internet! That’ll cure his staring-at-a-screen-itis!
I’m sorry, I’ve heard this argument practically all my life and it’s a classic case of “parents just don’t understand.” If your son is 19 and chooses to spend all his free time playing video games it doesn’t make him addicted, it makes video games what he chooses to spend his free time on.
I was the same way (a lot of people would say I’m still this way) and if he’s 19 and would rather play video games than “go out” it’s because he doesn’t want to go out. Leave him alone and let him be an adult his way.
Oh, and girls who play video games or appreciate gaming are the hottest girls in the world, so when he wants to, he’ll have that going for him.
Missed the edit window:
Let me tell you a little story. When I was a teenager my mom was visiting with one of her friends. I was friends with this woman’s son and daughter. The daughter was a year younger than me and having trouble with another girl in my grade.
I was playing video games while they were talking and my mom asked me if I knew this girl. I told her I know of her, but didn’t really know her. She took the same attitude you did and said “it’s probably because she doesn’t play video games all the time” and the adults snickered. I turned around, rolled my eyes and remembered why I wasn’t friends with this girl:
She was a bitch and most of her “friends” hated her and she was a heavy drug user that spent most school days in a haze. I also had to bite my tongue so as not to mention why this woman’s daughter knew her (she was getting heavily into drugs as well).
This was not the kind of person I wanted to associate with and she eventually dropped out to be addicted to games and have a baby at 17.
So please remember the alternative (albeit, an extreme one) the next time you berate your son’s video game playing. It’s just a hobby, don’t turn it into the boogeyman that idiot politicians and crazy Helen Lovejoys believe video games are.
This is turning into a hijack. I will only say one more thing: . I live with my son every day and while I do see everyone’s point, anything can be done too much even good things and he plays too much. That’s my humble opinion and you won’t change my mind. He even thinks he plays too much.
Some of you didn’t read or ignored where I said that it’s keeping him from doing things he enjoys. When he does do other things he is a much happier person. I don’t want him to stop playing, I don’t want him to do things he hates, I want him to be a healthier, happier person which he is if situations occur that force him to back away from the games for a while.
Then he has much bigger problems than video games. I’m sorry and I hope he gets the help he needs.
What I was really trying to say to the OP is that I recommend waiting to get the video games until the child has other interests firmly in place because for some personality types the video games can be too enticing.
My son is getting the help he needs but I feel as if he had other strong interests to start we could have avoided most of the problems.
No, I’m sorry, that’s wrong. You might think I’m attacking you, but that’s just not the way it works.
Stop listening to the politicians who claim video games are the devil and ask yourself if you’ve heard of anyone saying they were addicted to books, movies, TV shows or MP3s, because they’re all just forms of entertainment. They physically can’t be addictive in and of themselves.
This is started with you saying he was a fine young man who had no problems at school or at work, now you are making it sound like hes a recovering meth junkie. Would you be this concerned if he spent all that time reading books instead?
yes