So I won't let my 10 yo son play PlanetSide 2 - Am I wrong?

The Game Room
1

I have four children. The oldest is ten, and he’s keen on computer gaming. He is also reads books (read The Lord of the Rings, for instance, hooray I guess), and have lots of friends, is social, and we play board games every now and again, so in short he has other interests too, and computer games is not in itself an issue with him from my point of view.

But he enjoys it very much and it is important, and as a parent I do not allow him to play whatever he wants, and not how much he wants, because I think it is good to do other things too.

Up until now the favourite game has been Minecraft, and he has been “allowed” to play that over the internet with friends two hours each day after school during the weekdays afternoons. So everybody’s been happy.

However. Now the main computer game a friend has started to play is PlanetSide 2, and a couple of other friends too, and he asked me if he could download it to play with them as they have been playing Minecraft.

As a parent with four children and a day job, I didn’t spend too much time to investigate what kind of game it was, but a quick Google gave that it was a first person shooter, and that the recommended age was 16.

So I said no, and explained to him that he can’t at the age of ten, each day after school, sit down and play FPSs with guys over the internet. This is the short version of our conversation and my motifs, I will elaborate if anybody is interested.

He was devastated. The reason for that was twofold: 1) he simply thinks it seems so darn funny, and 2) “everybody” is talking about it in school. Planetside 2 is a common interest for his friends, and now he cannot be “in” it.

That’s very unfortunate but quite anticipated. So the next day I asked what “the guys” said, and it wasn’t much, apparently, because “then the bell rang”.

As most parents would I felt bad about the risk that my “No” would make my son lose his part in the group of friends, but I thought I let a few days pass and then talk to him again.

Now, a few days later, he asks if he will be allowed to play the game when he turns 11. We talked about it and I told him why I don’t want him to play FPS for 16 years olds and he said that Toy Soldiers (Xbox Arcade game which we’ve played together) is for 16 years olds too, and was again weeping though he tried to hide it.

We talked for a while about this and amongst other things I asked why he spends his breaks at school talking with certain friends about a game he is not allowed to play, he has other friends who does other things – and he told me “it gives me some comfort talking about it [when I cannot play it]” (!).

Of course I could download the game and spend the time I’ve spent on writing this post to get to know the game better, but instead or before I do that I’d like to get some input from either other parents who struggle with similar questions, and/or dopers who are familiar with the game in question.

What are your thoughts? On the one hand, regarding children and these kinds of games in general, and on the other, this game in particular? Am I being a dumb parent here, who “doesn’t understand anything”?

PS. Before anybody throws that out, perhaps I should point out that I’m not asking you anonymous guys on the internet how to raise my children, I just feel a discussion regarding these matters, and perhaps some input on the game in question, would do me good.

PPS. I put this in the Game Room because I suppose it is here where I find the guys who knows about Planetside, but if the mods think it rather belongs in another section and moves it I won’t start a ATMB thread about it. :wink:

PPPS. English is not my first language, please disregard spelling or grammatical errors.

2

You’re a terrible parent!!!

Not giving in and letting your kids do as they please when they please? Why I never!

I think following the guidelines is a good thing. That’s what they are there for. Since you obviously care that he cares so much about it, I’d recommend you go ahead and check out gameplay videos on Youtube.

Now a days a parents doesn’t have to actually play the game. Watch a review of the game, watch some gameplay - spend all of 20 minutes and you should have a clear idea on whether or not it’s appropriate for your child or not.

That's a beginner's guide showing off some gameplay, for example.

That’s Angry Joe’s review.

There’s no blood or gore in the game. I suppose you can think of it as a giant game of laser tag… however, you are still shooting other people, avatars collapse when shot, etc. It IS a violent game.

3

Sometimes I think when give our kids things too early it leaves them with nothing to look forward to- no milestones to mark. Growing earns more responsibility and more privilege.

My daughter didn’t get a Facebook account until she was actually, really thirteen. She waited and looked forward to it, and had fun on her bday setting it up.

4

Forgot to mention that there’s also the concern of an open server. In Minecraft you can set up a private server and just play with friends, this is open to everyone and you’re playing with thousands of people at the same time. I don’t knwo if there ware ways to block global chat, maybe someone who plays can say, but IF you decide to let him play, that might be something you can agree upon - no chatting with strangers, set up a chat server with your friends only.

5

For background, I’m in my 30s and play video games regularly. I’ve played Planetside 2, but FPS really isn’t my favorite type of game.

You’re the parent. I would have made the same call. Planetside isn’t especially violent or graphic as FPS games go. It’s probably on the tame end, in fact. Still, I 10 years old is the young end of the range for any FPS, IMO. I didn’t play Doom until I was probably about 14, and even then, only after asking my parents.

I think the people on the open server should be more of a concern than the content of the game. I’ve heard rants and raves that weren’t appropriate for my ears now, never mind a 10 year old. PS2 has open servers, and it needs too many players to use private servers. Gamers online can be the most friendly and noble people around, but too often they’re the most misanthropic tolls I’ve encountered.

6

I played Doom when I was 7 and Duke Nukem 3D when I was 10. My dad was supposed to turn the boobies off, but at 10 I also knew he used the same password for everything and had no problem unlocking them when my folks weren’t around. Granted, Doom/Duke3d are a lot more pixellated and silly than today’s games, but I turned out just fine. (And Planetside 2 isn’t exactly a gory game - yes, it’s a shooter, but it’s not Mortal Kombat or Bulletstorm’s “buckets of blood” design). I don’t think violent/sexual media makes kids anymore violent or sexual than they’d already otherwise be.

Personally, I’d say 10 is probably on the early side. 12-13 is definitely old enough, in my eyes. Most of my video gaming with friends really started in middle school around 12-13 - my friendships and life would have been drastically different had my parents not let me play games like Half-Life, Diablo or Starcraft around that age. It sounds dumb, but yeah, we spent a heck of a lot of free time talking video games.

I agree with some of the other posters here that my main concern would not be the game itself, but the other users in chat. Unfortunately, those games like to attract lots of people who swear, or worse, use tons of racial/homophobic language.

I also somewhat like IvoryTowerDenizen’s idea of using it as a reward for good behavior. If the kid shows he’s mature enough, or deserves it by getting good grades or such, then it can be useful. I know my parents would’ve shut down the video games if I was getting subpar grades.

7

You’re obviously wrong from my perspective. I started playing the very graphic Doom at an early age. But then it depends on how intelligent the kid is and if he has sense of empathy/understanding with others.

And yes “I turned out fine”. First Person Shooters help develop reflexes and rapid decisionmaking.
I would be more worried about the “Massive Multiplayer” aspect. Often these type of games, especially if they are free sucker in kids into an endless so called “grind” of experience and gold for endless progression of stats (statistics improving their character) and in-game items. Sometimes they lead to a slippery sloap where the kids spend more and more of their own or your money for goods and services that are “premium”.

But it’s the same with hockeycards and digimons or what ever the kids spend their monies on nowdays.

8

As an avid video gamer, and someone who looks forward to having kids someday but doesn’t yet currently, I say that you should go with your gut.

My parents restricted me from pretty much nothing when it came to video games when I was a kid in the early-mid 90’s. But they weren’t nearly as bad then either. I don’t think playing violent video games is going to harm your son, but I also think that it’s important to have reasonable boundaries, and allowing certain games while disallowing others isn’t a bad idea.

I do think that you should keep your son off of games where there is a lot of voice chatting. Even I avoid them for the most part, and whenever I join a game with lots of chatting, I turn it off immediately, because there’s only so many times you can hear “die faggot!” and such before it just totally ruins the game for you (one time for me, ymmv).

9

Yup. The problem today is not only violence but that the manipulation of the mind has grown as an industry and is reaching excellent levels today! Oh these fools spending hundreds of dollars a month on cosmetic additions for example. This poor child spend thousands of her parents dollars on some Facebook app!

Of course there are extremely violent games. But violence isn’t the problem even here. The problem for an intelligent kid would be the glorification of violence and its promotion. Such games probably not even adults should play. But Postal 2 can be fun :slight_smile:
Frankly even though parents allowed me to play MMORPGs and I met some awesome people and learned english there I might not allow my kid to do it today. At least not games I don’t know.

She should tell her kid to get everyone to play Battlefield 4 instead! Hah.

10

Fastest way to check the game out is going to youtube to look at some gameplay vids, there should be thousands of them for Planetside 2. I’ve played it myself: the violence isn’t very graphic and there’s no bad language or nudity inherent in the game but you’ll never know what the other players will say in the chat of course.

If your kid was 14-15 I’d say you should just let him play, but 10 is kind of young.

11

Planetside is probably the most kid-friendly you’ll get in the first-person shooter genre.

The actual shooting/killing aesthetic is a somewhat sterile sci-fi; the most graphic effect you’ll see is someone’s personal forcefield dissipating in a spray of blue energy.

The player base trends towards a 20s/30s demographic and fairly serious, so you generally will rarely encounter the sort of crass epithets and hateful trash-talking that’s supposedly common on a console shooter. Young kids coming on the voice chat do tend to get teased for their age / high-pitched voice, but it’s usually good-natured, so meh.

That said, it’s still a public multiplayer game on the internet, so, welcome to people. That exposure’s going to happen sooner or later, though.

Honestly, my first inclination would be to nudge a 10-year-old away not for exposure reasons, but because they’d probably wind up being more of a threat to their own team.

12

Thank you all for the great replies. Because it is important to him to know when he is allowed to play it, and since the game itself doesn’t seem harmful, so to speak, I’ll tell him he has to wait until he’s twelve; and then – if the game is still interesting – we’ll look into the possibility of turning off the voice chat, etc.

I think this decision makes it easier in the future too, because if he is allowed to play this FPS now, then some of his friends will suggest another later on, which is a little more on the violent side, and then there we will go through all this again. But hopefully as of now, he’ll accept that FPSs on open servers are not okay at this age of his.

He is a reasonable guy and if he get a clear line that I’m able to motivate I think he can accept that and look forward to all the goodies he’ll get as he grows older.

13

On an unrelated note, it does warm the cockles of my heart that there’s a new generation of PC gamers out there :wink:

And it’s not just a bunch of zombies popping bubbles on ipads.

14

My take on it is use the guideline as simply that. Not hard and fast but something that would have you research a bit and decide if the game would pose any particular issues with your child.

15

You are not wrong for not letting your ten year old play a game rated for sixteen year olds. On the other hand i think the people who rated planetside 2 as a game for 16 year olds were very wrong. It’s not a realistic first person shooter like call of duty or the battlefield series, the violence is slightly above a G.I. Joe cartoon. Video games don’t have that much longevity, specially not first person shooters which rely on a critical mass of players to keep them fun. PS2 is already over a year old, there is very little chance it will still be very popular in two more years.

16

I would never advise falling for “everyone else’s parents …”

But if I can give a sort of Chip Smith argument here: why (if it’s true) aren’t other parents dissuaded by the rating?

Now, the answer might be “they didn’t do the bare minimum of investigation required to even know this.” It may be “they don’t care what happens to their kids.” It may be “they’re actively training their kids to become violent sociopaths.” But it’s a question to consider.

17

Perhaps they are? – It’s not a majority of friends who play Planetside, only two or three, and perhaps it’s because it’s not okay with many parents. I admit that I do not know that at this point.

18

Darn it, guys, complicating things! Now here’s what I just did. I went down to his room (he’s just got to bed, we’re not in an American time zone) and we had the following dialogue:

Me: “Are you still awake?”
He: “Yes… you?”
Me: “Uhm, yes. - Here’s what we do. Tomorrow we download the game and play it together, and decide whether this is a game we feel you can play.”
He: “Thanks…”
Me: “Don’t thank me, we might decide you’ll have to wait a couple of years.”
He: “I mean, thanks for giving me another chance.”
Me: “Oh. Well, good night.”
He: “Good night.”

19

Thats cool

20

When the first Batman Dark Knight movie came out, I knew several parents who took their eight year olds to see it. I can’t even begin to understand why some parents make the decisions they do.