I am told by many family members that I was perilously close to being named "Zsigfried Gustavf ", but at the last moment, cooler heads prevailed.
Oh, and those would have been BOTH of my middle names. Yep. My birth certificate shows 4 names. God help me.
Cartooniverse
It’s people like you who caused the name shortage leaving people like me without middle names! 
I’ve got a coworker whose daughter’s name is Ryleigh - just too, um, precious… Then there was the former coworker whose girls were named Star and Sparkle. Neither of those names pass the “Ambassador” or “Senator” test.
Whiner.
Your middle name is Chat. It’s right there, plain as the nose on your face.
I swear.
I’ve always thought the parents of the Hilton sisters (the modern ones, not the conjoined twins) missed an opportunity by not making the girls a matched set: Paris Hilton and Beverly Hilton!
I went to school with a pair of brother named Hookah and Tron.
Tron got into the movie of the same name for free when it came out.
There is a reason for this, possibly mentioned before: the “een” sound - ín - on the end of a name is Irish for “diminutive”, and is often applied to girls, similar to the “ko” syllable in Japanese, though it is also applicable to males as well - qv. Michaleen in The Quiet Man.
So Ruthín is a perfectly reasonable thing to call her!
If we’re going to discuss bad things to name your kid, we cannot forget Shannyn Sossamon of The Rules of Attraction, who in 2003 named her son…
Audio Science Clayton.
She’s a DJ, you see.
And the poor kid will be called Oddy. 
Hey, I’ve worked jobs where I had to wear a nametag in public. It had my real name on it only about 50% of the time.
My stepdaughters-to-be graduated high school this decade, and swear they know a classmate of theirs who named her baby “Abcde”. Pronounced, if I remember, “A-Bec-Dee”.
A coworker of mine named his son Rainey. When we both worked in the main office in Seattle it made more sense, but now they’re in Florida so I expect the next kid to be Stormy, Hurricane or Sunny.
No-no-no.
The girl is named R’leyh, after the non-Euclidean city beneath the sea, where Dread Cthulhu lies dreaming. Soon, she shall be a bride of a Deep One, or somesuch.
And they’ll be singing THIS at the wedding.
Or THIS.
Atom Egoyan seems to have done okay with his first name.
FWIW, he did have his name changed. But it was his last name, formerly “Yeghoyan”.
I went to summer camp with a Michael and Sean. They were sisters. Both insisted that heavens no, their parents hadn’t wanted boys! Riiiight.
Lissa writes:
!!
Do you live in or near Utah? Utah is the home of weird “La-…” names. I’vwe known or known of LaDawn and LaBelle and LaNette (not “Lynette”) out in The Beehive State.
But at least they were all girls
Whoa…so that’s what that Nirvana song was about!
Working in the admissions office, I get to see a lot of this kind of stuff from prospective students. My favorite:
DeJon Butter.
OH! I totally forgot to mention my dear college roommate, totally sweet girl, who was named Eowyn, pronounced “YO-win.” Her parents evidently liked Tolkein, but didn’t understand accent marks.
<hijack>
Wow, a fellow Kwajer! I was there in 87/88 and absolutely loved it!
Yep - the killer was the girl named “Temptress” who was screwing around (literally) in her early teens (or maybe it was 11?). Her mother thought she was naming her after the middle daughter on “The Cosby Show” - Tempestt Bledsoe (bad enough as it is, at least it doesn’t carry connotations of “slut”). She also did not know what the word “temptress” meant. Somehow, the girl managed to live up to it, anyway.
Just remembered another one…
Malice Green, a black man who was killed by some Detroit cops back in 1992, spurring some serious rioting IIRC.