I was very suspicious of the “mystery meat” being served there at Del Mar …
I bet he can’t.
Ultimate whoosh.
My Laundromat has those machines too, so does the arcade.
It’s astounding to me that ANYONE in this day and age - let alone a self-proclaimed casino expert - could report this sort of nonsense with a straight face.
Unless he’s been living under a bridge the last few years.
Now you’ve all gone and given away the secret to the magic “break even” slots!
The ones that the casinos scatter around the floor and then desperately hope that no one plays…
No, the ones with no flashy lights that the casinos put near the rest rooms or the parking garage. Called ‘ATOM Machines’ or something like that.
I think the problem here is you seem to believe people think your a degenerate because you play poker. Playing poker just confirms it for some people. I’m sure plenty of people think your a degenerate and know nothing about you playing poker.
“Degenerate” ? 1958 called…
The idea that gambling is treated as a “Degenerate” activity is just so bizarre to me that, quite honestly, I wonder if our OP has ever actually been in a casino.
I have been to casinos all over North America, and without a single exception that comes to my mind they are absolutely overrun by old people. Basically, anywhere from 30 to 80 percent of the clientele, depending on the time of day, is made up of Grandma and Grandpa, perfectly ordinary people who like slot machines and such. The demographics will change a bit; at a Detroit casino you will see many old black people, while at a Niagara Falls casino you will see mostly old Chinese people, but they’re all old people who, for the most part, seem to be having casual fun. Casinos are not dark, Mob-dominated places; they’re shiny and full of bells and have gentle promotions and meal deals to appeal to senior citizens.
Those are the regulars, anyway. MOST people I know will go to a casino occasionally just for a few kicks. Casinos are now so commonplace that there is really no mystery or myth to them anymore; they’re everywhere now and almost all adults have tried them.
Do those things still work? I’d hate to think that some Dumb Ass would face-plant full speed into a wall because he was running like an idiot some where he wasn’t supposed to be.
Then again, its Vegas. Maybe they’ll airlift him out.
Course that’s as likely as a Dumb Ass learning not to smoke… but I digress.
Cancer: It’s for people Too Stupid to listen.
I think the problem is that he seems to believe people think anything about him.
I’m struggling to envision a plausible scenario that involves you being an authentic, reasonably decent human being AND being constantly harassed by people supplying you with their uninformed opinions on poker and casinos. It’s hard.
Scenarios where you are making stuff up out of some deluded notion we’ll be impressed, or where you do play poker but you offer such unpleasant companionship that people harass you in hopes you’ll go away, are far easier to imagine.
Casino Controller here.
Umm, no. Just… not even fucking close.
- Someone, usually a regular patron, discovers what he or she thinks is a “hot” machine.
- Said patron tells absolutely nobody.
- Said patron makes several visits over the next few days, ends up losing, chalks it up to a fluke (or, if paranoid, figures casino management is on to him, and has switched out the eprom or whatever, just to fuck with him).
- Said patron continues on his quest to find the “hot” machine of the moment.
Casino management knows every single minute of every day how much every single machine on the floor is holding. They also know the theoretical hold of every machine before they even place it on the floor. They’re also smart enough to know that moderate swings in net win on a single machine over short periods are meaningless.
Then you haven’t been in a casino in at least ten years. Very few casinos have machines that pay out in coins these days. It’s (guessing) 99.8% TITO tickets for slot machines in US casinos.
Maybe whoosh 2 of a gamblin’ expert, but:
Aw c’mon–go with the whoosh of the OP. Let’s not let facts git in the way of my gamblin’! I’m due for a win here!
Well, keep up with the times. The machines you like so much are all relegated to the kiddie arcade now, where they play the Pong and the Zaxxon and stuff.
Yeah…OK…smart guy with the times: how do I break even with these new-fangled games? Because you
can’t beat my break-even system.
Anybody who thinks casinos are classy should take a look at the workmanship. Off-the-shelf shiny stuff, cut and assembled haphazardly because nobody is going to look too closely because they are drunk, or just having too much fun. The same craftsmanship you see in a strip mall, with the same life expectancy–it’ll last until the tax breaks end and it’s amortized, then they’ll tear it down before it collapses and build another one, just as crappy.