What?
Oh, wait, no, that’s not me. I’m the other guy. Right. q;}
Ender-Will,
What So-Cal town are you living in? We might be talking about the same three fly-girls dancing in the street!
Fnord.
Damn. Someone made that joke already.
Sadly, I haven’t entirely forgotten what an obnoxious little twit I was at that age, although I’m actively trying to block it out. I’m 25 now, and try to be extra nice to people to make up for it.
You just can’t get any worse than middle school aged kids. And I know exactly what you mean by the slow street crossing little shits. They’ll fucking stare at you and walk super super slow. I usually speed up and get as close as I can, like someone else said.
I actually had an older man do this to me in a shopping center parking lot yesterday. Stared at me and walked as slow as humanely possible. I just looked at him, waved my hand and said “after you!” He stopped and stared at me as I drove off, like he was expecting applause for making it across the damn street. The fuck? I was stopped the whole time, I didn’t “try to nick him” like I do to the demon spawn middle school children. What an ass.
Anyhoo, yeah, middle school teachers and people like Incubus deserve fucking medals for dealing with their shit on a daily basis.
Oh yeah, I used to teach Middle Schoolers, and I do believe they are the eighth plague (I’d take more locusts if I had a choice.)
What I used to do was give them as few opportunities to get on my nerves as possible. (Maybe keep your water bottle on you.) I also used creative ways of getting on their nerves, give the annoying kids a nickname, not an obviously insulting one or just pretend you don’t know their name. That way, if a parent gets involved later you can say it was a term of endearment or plead ignorance. Find the lamest ways of praising their stupid hijinks, say, “Oh, that’s sooo cute!” or “I used to do that when I was six!” And NEVER let them know what really pushes your buttons.
Even teachers will pull aside that one really Special kid and whisper in an ominous tone, “Do that again and I will kick your butt so hard my foot will be lodged in your esophagus.” If ever asked about it, deny, deny, deny.
Worse comes to worse, get a bullhorn and a really loud whistle.
When I was that age, I used to saunter as slowly as possible through the crosswalk until I was right in front of a car. Then I’d stop and tie my shoelace. Clumsily, so that I’d have to undo it and start over.
If I had a time machine, I’d go back and beat myself with a baseball bat.
Yeticus Rex Santa Barbara
One of my friends drives this utter piece of shit Mazda pickup, and he drives on the offense. So, when kids are acting stupid, he doesn’t stop, just veers around, yells at 'em and keeps on trucking. It’s great to see them finally realize just how stupid they’re being, but I would feel kind of bad if he killed one of them.
And, Miller, could I help you?
Sure. I need someone to hold my legs; I was squirmy at that age.
I blame our legal system partially for the way middle school children act. I hear that discipline at the school district I work for wasn’t a problem when the principal could paddle your stupid little ass. The principal of our middle school was notorious for breaking a paddle or two over the years. My mom got paddled by him when she was in school and she learned her lesson good that day. Punishment these days is a joke.
When I was still in high school, I used to slow down when I saw that there were already people crossing and that I obviously wouldn’t be able to make it over in that lot.
The crossing guard/lolly pop man didn’t seem to think the way I did and instead, held up the line while glaring daggers at me until I finally jogged the rest of the way.
How would “2rd” be pronounced? “Turd”?
Uh, dwc190, you’re a little behind. That typo was stomped firmly into the ground a couple of days ago.
Ah, you folks are SO easily amused…
For the record, I was going to state “between 3rd and 4th grade.” It struck me then, of course, that middle school doesn’t begin until the 5th grade. Hence the typo.
Hope that clears it up. And, for the LAST time, I am a blonde and should thus receive way more latitude on errors.
LIES!
In St. Louis, 3rd is pronounced “turd”