This may be a bit too personal for some, but I’m curious. Some background on what prompted this thread: my senior year in high school, I was co-captain of a horrible drumline. One day, I approached our director with a problem in the line that I felt was out of our hands, and that he needed to address. He stopped, turned around, and pointing to a kid in a wheelchair, he said, “You think you have problems? HE’s got problems,” then walked off. I was horrified. Since becoming an RA, I’ve had to confront people about things that they do that are potentially problematic to the floor - their response? “That’s nice - but you should concern yourself with bigger problems, like charity work for the floor, rather than trying to help us stop our drinking.” In not so many words, but that’s the basic message. It still horrifies me.
So, among those willing to respond: do world concerns (disabilities, diseases, etc.) come first for you, or do you just try and survive in your immediate surroundings?
It’d be nice to be able to do something about world, or even USofA, hunger but the simple truth is that there are limits. You can, OTOH, affect a change of your own life or those around you relatively easily.
I deal with what I can, which is to say I take the “practical” approach and don’t worry overmuch, personally, about third world starving, totalitarian governments, or persons with handicaps. I help where I can, do the occasional volunteer work (MS and Habitat for Humanity) and leave it at that, for the most part.
You know how people say, “life isn’t fair”? Well, life is fair because it’s not. Everyone has problems, some seem worse than others, and it can be true that some are worse than others. I believe that things even out over the long haul. Others will probably disagree with me, but that’s the way it goes. When things like that happen (like with your band teacher) it kind of irritates me. I’ve been in situations where people say, “Yeah, your situation isn’t great, but it could be so much worse.” I feel like saying, “yeah, but it’s not so much worse. Please, don’t discredit my feelings, my situation sucks for me, and I’m very aware that it could be worse, that doesn’t mean that my current problems don’t matter.”
I do agree thought that sometimes we need things put in perspective. Maybe your problem with the band was a really small, petty thing that you were complaining about. Anyway, that’s kind of (one of many) my personal philosphy: Life is fair because it isn’t.
Correct response: ‘Yes, that kid really does have problems, but that’s not what I asked you about, is it?’
Just because a problem is not high up on the scale of human tragedy is no reason not to attempt to solve it. Especially if it happens to be your job to solve it. Your band director should be taken to task for his comment. What he was really saying is ‘Don’t bother me, kid.’
[rant]
How dare he say that that kid has problems. How does he know? Did he ask the kid? That kid could have been the smartest, most well adjusted kid, with gobs of friends and love at home! Just because he was in a wheelchair does not mean that he has “problems” either emotionally or physically!
[/rant]
{deep breath…exhale…}
OK. Now, I tend to believe that by “surviving our immediate surroundings” as worded in the OP, we tend to slowly push the world more inline with the greater good. See, I don’t really think that one person can have an effect on the world that is both profound and longlasting. (Take, for instance, the interesting position taken in India by “followers” of Mahatma Ghandi who espouse the very thing he fought against.) However, if everyone “did the right thing” the entire world would slowly benefit. Big ships turn slowly.
If I teach my son to handle situations nonviolently and he “teaches” this to some of his friends and eventually teaches this to his children (hoping others do this too), the population of “nonviolence” would increase. And so on. Is this a cop-out? Is this just me justifying why I don’t volunteer at soup kitchens or rebuild houses and apartments in the projects? Nah, I don’t do that 'cause I’m a cynical old bastard.
Of course, I’m one for helping out fellow man and all. I’ll do CPR on you if you stop living, or whatever emergency first aid you require, regardless of who you are. I’ll even call 911 and your SO and wait until they both arrive. I think most people would do the same.