The ‘I pit shitty drivers’ BBQ thread (the title – I haven’t opened the thread) instantly made me think ‘I shit driver pits’. This in turn reminded me of a phrase my dad used to use:
Shaking like a dog passing peach pits
When the air was rough (for flying), dad would say it was
rough as a cob
Apparently that’s from a time when people used corn cobs for wiping after defecation. A ‘brown-nose(er)’ is a sycophant – someone who has his nose up his superior’s arse. Of course these are not desirable people to have around. When I was a kid my dad’s friend from across the street would knock on the door. Dad would call out:
Is your nose clean?
Speaking of noses…
How’d you like a poke in the snot-locker?
And speaking of threats…
How’d you like a toilet water shampoo? (i.e., a ‘swirly’)
My dad used to say, of someone who looked bad (tired, sick, whatever), that the person looked like they’d been “rode hard and put away wet” (referring to something you’d never want to do to a horse.) Even though my dad spoke perfectly good English, the expression was “rode hard,” never “ridden hard.”
My mother, in similar circumstances, would have described the same person as looking like they’d been “shot at and missed and shit at and hit all over.”
It’s falling out of use, but I still hear half-past (or quarter-after or quarter-till) on a regular basis, mostly by people older than I am (35). I actually say the quarters if it’s within a few minutes, but never the half-past.
It’s a throwback to when digital time was still a novelty. There were only 4 times… x O’Clock, Quarter-After x, Half-Past x (or x:30) and Quarter-Till X. I suspect that schedules weren’t as tight back then and there was no practical difference between 7:30 and 7:37 unless you had a train to catch.
My aunt still calls me Snicklefritz which seems to have originated with the Pennsylvania Dutch (which my family has absolutely no connection to).
Grandpa, when threatening us young’uns would say I’ll give you a knuckle sandwich with five jalapenas.that’s not a misspelling of jalapenos. that’s just how he said it And would curse by saying dadgummit! and goldurnit!
And Nana, after she told us to do something and we’d dawdle, would say You waiting for an invitation?