My husband and I met and married in Florida, our daughter was born there, his parents lived there. Then he got a job in Fredericksburg, VA and I got one in Dahlgren, VA, so we moved. Three years later, he was transferred back to Florida, so I went back to my old job. Within a very short time, we realized that we really hated Florida. Unfortunately, our daughter had just started high school and we didn’t want to make her move again in such a short time.
After 2 years, husband got a job in Maryland and I stayed in FL till our daughter graduated and was settled in college. Then I moved north again, getting a job with the same organization in Dahlgren. We’ve been here for 11 years now and have no intention of moving, especially not to Florida ever again. It’s not the cheapest place to live, and we get our share of blizzards and occasional tornadoes. Our county is politically much more right-wing than we are. But we really like it here and I can’t think of anywhere else I’d want to live.
I expect the only thing that would dislodge us is being given a home and an income in a place we didn’t hate (like Florida) but since that is highly unlikely, I think we’re here till the end.
I moved from the Kansas City, MO area to Tacoma, WA with my wife in 2009. We had both gone to college several hours each from our respective parents already (Columbia, MO), so it wasn’t a huge jump to leave what college friends we had and move away. Then, when we had a son, my parents moved here to do the grandparent thing.
I want to move away, but it’d be a very rude, dickish move on my part after my parents gave up their friends to move here too, and after they’ve already settled in and made friends and found a church they like. I just have that Wanderlust at this point, and the itch is starting to drive me crazy. I would love to live in Ireland, Scotland, Sweden, New Zealand, and maybe even the Victoria, B.C area, but with a kid, it’s more difficult. My wife’s job isn’t one that transfers easy either (Physical Therapist, licensing issues mostly, not impossible just more of a commitment than mine - programmer).
Geez, based on your first sentence, I thought this was a hypothetical where we could never talk to or see family or friends again. I still would have answered yes, if I didn’t have my son to think about.
Moving cross country, though? Hell yes. I’ve done it twice and I don’t regret it at all. We have internet and phones and planes to keep in touch will people. If I win the lottery, I’ll do it again and move to Maine.
We’ve seriously discussed leaving California if/when we have the resources to do so. We’re both very unhappy with the social/political climate here, and for all the wallet-wringing CA does, the economic situation is still pretty much circling the drain. Doesn’t help that we live in Sacramento, where loads of TAX money is going into the new arena when we have a perfectly good one that apparently just wasn’t good enough for a bunch of pampered millionaires playing games, so of course the taxpayers are just THRILLED to see lots of small businesses closed down and have money that could have gone into trivia like public safety used to subsidize a for-profit sports team.
Prior to buying a house, I would have said “not much”. I really like my job, but I’m not that attached to it. If I got a nice enough job offer in a good city (I’m a city slicker…so it would have to be that), then I’d seriously consider it.
But I feel less like a nomad now that I own a house. So the job offer would really have to make it worth my while.
I like to think that nothing would make me stick around if my living situation started to deteriorate. Like, if by some crazy circumstance, I suddenly found myself living in a flood plain in the middle of tornado or hurricane alley, I hope I wouldn’t be one of those people who continually rebuilds, as if Mother Nature cares a single whit about my stubbornness. If my job were to dry up, I like to think I’d quickly make tracks somewhere else rather than floundering for years in the same place. But I don’t know how I’d be if the reality actually hit me since neither of these scenarios has happened to me.
I did this 5 years ago. I left with just what would fit in my car, cut off contact with my family and moved 200 miles away. Starting new was hard, but so necessary.
Work seems to be a popular reason. I picked a field where I could likely find work anywhere that has a large-ish enough city. Because of that, I’m fairly confident I could get a job in other places. Currently I have a relatively low stress job (for me) and the best commute I’ve ever had. Each time I’ve switched jobs in the past I was unsure if the new job would be as flexible, be as low stress, etc. and each time has been better than the last. I think this factor is kind of a neutral for me. I work to live and provide for the family, but beyond that I don’t get much satisfaction from work, and never have.
One thing I didn’t mention before - overcrowding. I don’t know the real stats on this, but it seems like there are more people everywhere I go. Whenever there are events, a major consideration is always the level of crowds, how to avoid them, how to minimize them, etc. Traffic is pretty terrible just about everywhere, and now I see that in my area they will be installing toll lanes in addition to carpool lanes, so if you want to pay more, you can use the special lanes. It’s fine, but it’s going to increase general traffic congestion. I’ll end up paying I’m sure.
When I think about all the issues, and especially the money, that’s just it. It’s just money. For example, if you need let’s say, $2000/month to live comfortably in disposable income, does it matter if you earn $10,000/month and have $8000 in expenses, compared to earning $5000/month and having $3000 in expenses? You still end up with $2K. I’m not sure if the larger numbers are more upsetting or just stressful in general. So if you would pay $8K in tax vs paying $3K in tax, but having the same quality of life, I’m not sure that’s enough.
I’ve tossed the idea around of New Hampshire. The winters and long distance are downsides there. Everything else sounds great. I’ll probably plan my next work trip out in Boston (never been there), and extend it a few days to visit and see what it’s like. Of all the places in the country, I think the only ones that have appeal are New Hampshire and Austin. Having a large family who is solely based in the area I am at is the biggest impediment to moving. If one or a few friends and family were in a target area, I think that’d make the transition much easier.
There are few free lunches. Moving away from CA unplugs you from a lot of desirable things re lifestyle and weather that people are willing to pay for but it also changes your social context. Being in a low tax scenario with associated B level social services and medical care is just one part of it. You will often be surrounded in these low tax states by racist Rush Limbaugh clones. These will be the people you will socialize with and whose children will populate your schools private and public. The first time one of your kids comes home from school or play talking about “niggers” will make you realize that not all you pay for with taxes is infrastructure.
I’ve spent my entire life moving around, so it wouldn’t take all that much. That said, I would likely not leave here unless my spouse needed serious medical treatment elsewhere or, god forbid, preceded me in death. I don’t care enough about anybody I know here to let that be a roadblock.
I am reasonably happy anywhere I can have access to a military base, high speed internet, a comfortable house [needs to be single level, wheelchair accessible, master bedroom with ensuite bathroom and a half bath for guests, a spare bedroom would be nice but I can cope with a guest on the sofa for a few days at need.] I am OK with basic cable if it comes with Music Choice channels [I tend to leave classical, tropicales, jazz and classic rock up as background noise unless there is something worth watching. I am considering just cutting cable entirely.] Well, I also have to have mrAru and my cat, though she is going to be 16 in 2 weeks and is not in the best of health and I fear we are going to lose her soon. She just hasn’t really snapped back after losing her new companion cat Cat5 in the fire last August.
So, it would have to be enough to rent a small house or apartment that allows cats, has air conditioning and high speed cable and is accessible. It would need to cover utilities, groceries, clothing, and auto costs. I don’t know, minimum of $5000 a month, and we would sort of wander around the US picking out housing near military bases. Hm, haven’t been to Fayettnam lately. Though coastal Carolinas can be rough in the summer.
And someone upstream mentioned New Hampshire - I found it rather nice in the summer, and not overly horrid in the winter. mrAru was stationed at the shipyard in Kittery for almost 18 months and lived both in barracks and in a motel - the motel was the brick monstrosity on the rt 1 roundabout, the indoor pool was fun in the winter. NH people seem pretty nice too - easy access to Boston Logan airport for the most part [I hate driving in Boston though it has greatly improved.] They do state owned booze stores, which is sort of different. I think if you do 2 business trips to NH, one in like Feb and the other in mid August to get the ends of teh weather spectrum.
Being in CA is not a shield against undesirable people. And a lot of the social aspects of CA are the things I don’t like. We voted to fund stem cell research. We are building a bullet train. We create a terrible climate for small businesses. The California Teachers Association (CTA) and the CA Prison Guards Union owns the state legislature. I hate the CTA. Kids are indoctrinated with the idea that schools always need more money. State and local government pensions are crushing to the budget. The University system raises tuition like crazy, and class availability is simultaneously going to shit with a 4 year graduation plan becoming unrealistic, all the while administrative pay continues to increase. Actually, that’s mostly economic issues. It’s the people and the state’s collective values that drive these though.
And I find it hard to believe that the rest of the country are havens for racists. There are good and bad people everywhere.
Up until a year ago I would have (and have!) picked up and gone anywhere you sent me. But with the advent of my grandson and a granddaughter to follow in about 60 days, I’m staying where I can be close to them and a part of their lives.
So…to move me, you’d have to move my entire family!
