I didn’t want to derail this thread about someone’s picky-eater girlfriend, but since my own girlfriend is a picky eater, I have to ask: If you’re a picky eater, why? Does most food just not taste good to you? What stops you from trying new things? This thread isn’t intended to bash picky eaters, but for me to educate myself.
P.S., I have asked my girlfriend why she won’t eat this or that (she refuses to eat sandwiches!), and she simply shrugs and says she doesn’t like them. I’m very adventurous with food and I have to fight her tooth and nail to get her to try new things, some of which she’s thanked me later for.
My mother was/is a beyond horrible cook. I grew up thinking that I only liked packaged food because that’s all that was edible. I then joined the airforce and lived in barracks and ate institutional food for the next 3 years. I was in my early 20’s when I was able to consistently eat good food and my late 20’s by the time I actually did.
I had to treat myself like most people treat their children. Try everything at least 10 different times before determining you don’t like it.
I think my last holdout is sushi. I have determined that I absolutely do not like the seaweed wraps so it’s a little rough there and I’m still working on the texture of raw fish.
The process has been worth it though - 20 years ago I wouldn’t eat avocado, black olives, green olives, most vegetables and sour cream. All of those are now on my favorites list.
There are a few things I won’t eat - but I don’t think it’s outside of the realm of normal now. Cilantro, really spicy things, curry and cottage cheese.
I don’t really consider myself picky. Though some I’m sure will.
I don’t like fish or seafood in any form. I’ve tried it many times and I just detest the flavor. I would like to like it, but really, it’s not a big deal. The seafood restaurants that I have been to always serve a good steak. Though the smell of the seafood is very off putting.
I dislike mushrooms as well. Combination of flavor and texture.
Don’t particularly like the spice curry, though I love all other hot/spicy food. Cilantro is OK in small doses.
I used to be a picky eater. I’ve gotten better, mostly by eating places where not everything is out of a freezer or a can.
There are very few things I absolutely don’t like - I don’t drink soda (I don’t like carbonation or really sweet drinks) and I won’t eat potatoes (I’ll have a bite or two of mashed potatoes and I’ll eat them if they’re in something). I also don’t like salad - whether of the random cold stuff variety or of the random vegetable variety, but I like vegetables and if you put it in a sandwich I’ll eat it. Or I’ll just pick out the good stuff and eat that - I just am not fond of lettuce on its own. Oh, and cantaloupe. Just the smell makes me sick.
I only really come across as picky if I’m at someone’s home. If I’m anxious or stressed or ‘off’ in any way (including low blood sugar, which, as you might imagine, makes things difficult), I don’t want to eat (and it happens easily). So, for example, I have a hard time when I’m visiting my grandparents - usually I’ll take some cereal, because breakfast is the biggest problem. And I have a hard time eating in the dark (it mostly only comes up when I’m camping, but I hate dark restaurants).
I have texture issues as well. I don’t think there is anything I can’t eat at all because of texture, but really smooth and bland things I can’t eat very much of. Eggs are the biggest problem, which is annoying because I like eggs. But I’ve had problems with everything from grilled cheese sandwiches to cereal. I literally start gagging, and if it’s really bad I’ll have to spit it out. I haven’t had a major problem with it in several years, but it’s something I have to watch for.
I’ll try anything at least once. Some things don’t taste good. Some things upset my stomach (mostly greasy foods). I can usually find something to eat, even if I don’t enjoy it.
There are quite a few things I won’t eat for various reasons. Some, I’m allergic to (nuts, berries). Some, are vile and loathsome (mushrooms, cilantro). Some, I’m not interested in eating because they’re incredibly unhealthy (fast food, snack chips).
Not anybody’s damn business why I don’t want to eat them. No one’s place to be passing judgment on me when I politely decline them. And someone “fight[ing] tooth and nail” to get me to eat them? Won’t be having anything to do with that… person… any more.
I’m more than happy to eat bread or just have some water if what has been offered isn’t to my taste. I’m an adult; I won’t starve. And I’m not rejecting the person person because I don’t want to try their OMG! teddy grahms with garlic powder and cheddar cheeze flavorings that they’re raving about.
I posted a lot in the other thread, so I’ll be brief. Basically, nobody told me that your first reaction can change. There are a lot of tastes I just find unpleasant. Add to this the fact that I don’t crave variety the way some people do. I was always quite happy on my limited diet. I would eat fruit and some vegetables, so malnutrition wasn’t an issue: I had no incentive to change. Why add unpleasant tastes to your diet when there are a sufficient number of pleasant tastes?
I don’t consider myself terribly picky, but there are a few pretty common foods that I don’t care for; shellfish, mushrooms, olives, raw tomatoes, sour cream, guacamole, and probably a few more. Sometimes it’s the taste, sometimes it’s the texture, sometimes it’s a combination of the two. I just tried a new Chinese restaurant that puts sliced water chestnuts in the Kung Pau Chicken; there’s something about those things that just doesn’t do it for me. But it’s not the end of the world.
That said, I’ll go back and try them again from time to time, to see if I’ve grown to like them. Or if I’m eating out or at someone’s house, I’ll try to be polite about it. I guess my one pet peeve is when something is served in such a way that the part I don’t like contaminates the part I do. If I get a sandwich or a burger with a slice of tomato on it, I like to take it off (eat it, ignore it, give it to my mom who loved tomatoes) so that I can enjoy the rest of the meal without it.
And I still try new things even if they don’t sound terribly appetizing. I’ve had chicken hearts and salmon roe sushi; neither of which became favorites but I’m glad I tried them.
Well I was a pretty picky eater as a kid, grew out of it by 17-18 and now I will eat almost everything (though I surely have my preferences and now that I cook for myself I eat nearly the same things each day). I had both texture and taste issues and for a very long time, could only eat certain foods (pasta, cheese) by swallowing small pieces whole without chewing at all… I was a crazy kid in other ways.
When I was ‘picky’, it was because the smell, taste, or mouthfeel of foods I ‘didn’t like’ filled me with a visceral disgust and sometimes, nausea. Often if I chewed them up (since my mom forced me to eat a lot of things), I would be unable to swallow for minutes and start gagging and drooling. Often the nausea would linger after I had to eat something gross, though I never threw up from it.
It seems to be the same for a lot of adult picky eaters I know (my recent ex-bf was one). Though some are more just stubborn/stuck in their groove, than others, and can branch out with coaching, I think some people are truly much more sensitive about food in both a physical and psychological sense and they are certainly not living on chicken nuggets just to be difficult.
For me about 75% of the issue is food texture. For example even though I love their flavors I hate the texture of most raw vegetables and several cooked vegetables. I hate the texture of some heavy sauces. While I love the flavor of yogurt I’ve only found one brand that doesn’t make me gag because of the texture. The other 25% of the issue is flavor. Things with a bitter flavor are horrifying to me. The taste and smell of seafood of any kind grosses me out. I don’t like the flavor of turkey, lamb, or game meats.
I’ve made incredible progress in improving my diet though. I’ve found that the foods that I have texture issues with aren’t a problem if they are diced small enough. I would never be able to sit down in front of a salad with lettuce, onion and red peppers but I just ate a wrap that had all of those things in it because they were diced very small and mixed in with black beans, corn, and chicken. Mushrooms (the worst of the texture issues for me) also don’t bother me when diced up which means now I get to enjoy things like stroganoff or beef bourginon (sp?).
A large part of the reason I’ve been able to stretch my food boundaries is because of my husband. He absolutely respects that I am an adult and able to make my own decisions about what I will and will not eat. He doesn’t cook salmon with a side salad and then make sad faces because I don’t want to try it. Instead he finds ways to help me cook foods in such a way that they won’t bother me. He knows that the bitter flavor of broccoli is not acceptable, but what if we saute it with garlic in some olive oil and then add some soy sauce? Then it is perfectly fine. Not my favorite thing in the world but I can absolutely eat broccoli cooked this way. The texture of onions is not okay but if you dice them up and saute them a little bit they can be added to almost anything and I have no problem with that. In fact many of the things I cook now start with dicing up an onion and frying it with some garlic. Because he has been so accepting of my issues with food and not judgmental of me for it that makes me want to expand my palate enough that we can go to restaurants that don’t really appeal to me because it would make him happy. I used to not even be willing to walk into an Indian restaurant at all but now I will go in and sit with him while he eats and have some garlic naan. He does the same thing for me. He thought he wasn’t a big fan of German food until I took him out to a lovely little German place downtown and now it is one of his favorite things. He swore he hated pot roast but because I love it he tries it when I make it. Sometimes he likes it and sometimes he isn’t impressed but he makes the effort for me which makes me want to make the effort for him.
I’m not picky. I’m not a very sensitive taster or texturer, so unless it’s really gross (liked canned asparagus), I’ll eat it.
But I do tend to look askance at spicy foods. I don’t like the “spicy” burps that usually follow. If one considers my diet, they’d think I was a very boring person. I usually eat the same bland things day after day. The first food that always comes to mind when I’m planning a meal is pizza. And then I’ll have to remind myself that I had pizza yesterday and the day before that. Sometimes this isn’t enough to persuade me against having pizza yet again! Every day at lunch I eat cheese toast, which is just a dumbed-down form of pizza. It’s a running joke at work.
I don’t think I’ve always been like this, at least to such a weird degree, but now I can’t seem to break out of it. I have more success breaking out of my routine with breakfast, though. The new thing for me is to try to eat at least four different things at breakfast. All last week it was brown rice, eggs, smoked salmon, and cream cheese. Today I had oatmeal, sugar, butter, almond milk, and cinnamon. It’s my small way of diversifying the palette.
So I don’t consider myself picky, just not very interesting. If someone wants to eat some exotic food, I’ll partake with them and even be a good sport if I’m not overjoyed. However, because I tend to eat so blandly, I’m likely not going to like something that is too complex flavor-wise. But chances are I won’t hate it either, and I’ll eat it all up if only 'cuz I’m paying for it!
I’m a picky eater because certain foods will make me gag unless used in a certain way.
Chicken. The only way I can eat it is Cici’s bbq chicken pizza, or when it’s ground up and cooked in pepperoni or brunswick stew. This one I can trace back to my elementary school serving chicken coated in peanut butter and peanuts. I haven’t been able to eat regular chicken since.
Turkey. I love the taste of turkey. Unfortunately, if I manage to get it down to my stomach, I’ll throw up within minutes. Usually I’ll gag so much trying to swallow that it won’t reach my stomach. No clue what causes this. The only exception I have found to this is turkey pepperoni.
Fish. I can’t stand fish unless it’s in some type of sushi. I can eat tuna, as long as it’s packaged in water and not oil.
Pork I just don’t care for, unless it’s sausage or bacon.
I don’t care for steak. I love the taste, but hate the texture. If I can grind it up and cook it burger style, I’ll eat it. Same goes for deer meat.
Can’t stand the taste or texture of any shellfish.
I don’t care for mushrooms except when used in gravies and sauces. Or when I’m using porta bello caps to make veggie burgers. I love those.
I’ll try new foods, even if it contains foods I normally don’t eat.
I’m not picky but there’s a category of food I can’t make myself eat–organ meats. I’ve tried to eat them several times, going into it with an open mind and enthusiasm after watching River Cottage and Hairy Bikers and all that. And every single time, I’ve nearly thrown up two or three bites into it. Liver. Heart. Tongue. Chicken feet. Fois gras even.
So I have sympathy with people who literally can’t get (or keep) certain things down.
I never really thought I was picky, but I’ve realized there are a few common things that many people eat that I just can’t stomach. Top of the list is any cooked vegetable that is cabbage-y. Maybe that comes from the epic dinner table stand-off that ended with me in tears unable to get even one mouthful down… nope, not even the filling, still tasted like cooked cabbage. I have the same aversion to broccoli and cauliflower. No problem with them raw, but just blanche them a little and they become inedible.
I was picky and unable to eat pretty much any cooked vegetable as a kid, but somehow I’ve managed to acquire the ability to eat some of them on the way. I no longer get the same gag reflex I did when I was younger and enjoy them now, but that sure wasn’t from being forced to choke them down as a kid, it was more from trying them well prepared of my own free will.
I don’t eat chicken or any bird meat now. I had chickens and parrots as pets and the thought of eating them squicks me out, just as eating cat or dog meat does for many people. Many people find that odd, but to me no odder than any other dietary meat restriction, be it religiously imposed (no pork, or no beef) or personally chosen.
I think I retain some of the food sensitivity of my childhood around berries and some fruits. I don’t mind fresh berries now, but couldn’t eat them as a child. Just didn’t like them. Processed fruit - either in jam or in pies was totally out. Still not fond of any processed berries - raspberrry coulis makes me gag and totally ruins a chocolate dessert, jam is still off the menu, but I can choke them down if I have to to be polite.
Sushi, cilantro, mushrooms, onions… all ok with me.
I don’t know if I’m exactly picky because the amount of things I will eat way outnumbers the stuff I won’t, but there’s enough things I’m fussy about that it probably counts.
I’m another seafood-shunner, unless it’s battered and fried fish, because that tastes like fried batter rather than fish. The smell of seafood just turns my stomach and the critters either look like boiled bugs or giant loogies. It’s not a problem, though, because every seafood place has steak or chicken on the menu.
I don’t like blue cheeses or cottage cheese, and I’m not crazy about Swiss. I’ll eat it if it’s melted in something, but not a slice on a sandwich or something.
I don’t like poultry on the bone or with skin, though if it’s served that way I’ll still eat it with the skin peeled off. The only exception is wings, which I won’t eat no way no how. And yet I love pork rinds, and yes I do know what they’re made of.
If there’s visible fat on a piece of meat, I will very carefully trim off every last scrap of it because the texture of it makes me want to ralph. If that meat is steak, however, I’ll be eating it bloody rare, which usually grosses out my tablemates enough to make them quit picking on me for cutting the fat off
I’m a picky eater, as well, and that’s usually the crux of it for me. It’s usually been vegetables (particularly raw veggies, or at least ones that haven’t been cooked to death) to which I’ve had that sort of reaction.
I’ll also say that, for most of my adult life, I’ve truly wished that I weren’t a picky eater. I feel embarrassed when I’m out to eat, or at someone’s house, and I don’t like the food that’s presented. I hate feeling like my fussy tastes limit what other people can do with me in social situations.
And, like Dr. Drake notes, I’d decided, as a kid or a teenager that I didn’t like certain foods, and never went back to them until recently (I’m in my 40s). Thanks, at least in part, to a friend who very patiently has worked with me on trying things, I can now say that there are a fair number of foods (particularly vegetables) which I would have classified as “hate them” five years ago, and now can eat them. I’m probably still a ways away from considering a salad to be a meal :), but I’m thrilled that there’s progress.
A few things are just too messy to eat. Wings ribs crab legs etc. Too much work involved. Other things I just don’t like. Coffee pickled stuff. Cottage chs. I’m slowly coming around to blue chs mainly in pasta or on top of a steak. I just wasn’t exposed to a lot when I wad young. Difference is that I like to try new things and I live flavors. I’m a lot better than I used to be. When I first starting dating my wife I called non American chs gourmet cheese.
People don’t always know exactly what it is about something they don’t like, be it a food, an outfit, a piece of art, or a person. Sometimes stuff just rubs someone the wrong way for no immediately obvious reason. If they think about it long enough they can usually articulate it, but most people aren’t going to sit and ponder like that about something unless it’s pretty important to them. So it really doesn’t surprise me that your gf doesn’t have a ready answer about why she doesn’t eat something.
Some of us just perceive things differently than other people. I’m not a picky eater, but I pick up a lot of bitter or sulferous flavors that the people around me just don’t taste, and a lot of seasonings just generally taste a lot stronger to me than they do to other people. It makes me pretty meh or blech about a fair few foods other people shovel down, and makes me really enjoy things other people reject as being bland or overly sweet. If this perception difference were stronger, or if I had grown up in a less “shut up and eat around it” household (my parents wouldn’t even discuss getting a half and half pizza, ffs) I might well be a picky eater.
