Pitch a totally fresh idea for a movie or TV show

Imagine yourself a wannabe producer or writer. See yourself meeting with a studio or network executive. While you are there to make the case that your idea will be absolutely free of anything derivative, will borrow no cliches, gimmicks, or even dialogue from earlier productions, you will be ushered out of the meeting if you fail in any way.

Give it your best shot.

Be 100% original.


See, TV executives don’t read. All I’d have to do is pitch to them the summaries of some high-faluting literary and comic book classics that have never been adapted or significantly re-interpreted or precedented in films or TV and claim they were original.

I’d adapt Clive Barker’s horror story, In the Hills, The Cities as a made for cable TV movie (with gay sex scenes intact; big hook there); Frank Miller and Dave Gibbons’ mini-series, GIVE ME LIBERTY, as a 4-part TV miniseries; CONCRETE as an ongoing TV show, using the comics for the basis of several story arcs, and use a device his creator said he should have used, and given Concrete amnesia and save his origin for last; adapt Jeff Smith’s BONE as 22-episode TV season-long animated maxi-series for television (borrowing SIN CITY’s “use the comic as a storyboard” dictum); and finally, adapt Los Brothers Hernandez’s original “Love and Rockets” comic as a two part, 4 hour TV-miniseries and Gilbert Hernandez’s “Heartbreak Soup” as a movie with an all Mexican cast. Viva La Luba!

Notice how the stories are multiethnic? Well, if the Bones can be considered “ethnic”…


Odin, Thor, Frey, Freya and the other gods fight the giants, prepare for ragnarok, and go through assorted hijinx all while being worshipped by pre-christian norse peoples. I’m seeing Alan Tudyk as Loki, kind of the wacky neighbor character.

Monkey Tennis?

I like it! That or monkey golf. Hippo mud wrestling.

Olympic tag-team sport fucking.

A reality show in which, every week, a different person is given a Borg-style implant or attachment and hass to live with it.
So you get a laser pointer built over your eye, or a voice synthezer/changer put over your larynx. Or you get an attached min-TV screen with a camera that shows you what’s behind you at all times (you get “eyes in back of your head”). Or a chainsaw attached to your hand. Something like that.

Follow people for a period of time to see how they start out clumsy with their new attachments. See how people around them relate to it. (“Hi, Bob! Oops – watch out for the chainsaw!”) Be sure to catch the moment when they break down because they can’t cope with having, say, a box welded on their head.

My idea for a reality show.
There are ten contestants.

The prize is 1 million dollars that all of them share so they all have 100k at the beginning.
The set would be difficult to build but I think it would be worth it.

The show is set in a sinking ship. The contestants are thrown into a room that is filling with water. They have to work together to get out of the room. There is a puzzle for them to figure out but it has an obvious solution that leaves one, or more persons behind, and a solution that gets them all through.

If they leave a person behind, the prize is reduced by $100,000.00. All contestants get a share but the share gets smaller and smaller with each player they fail to get to the next level.

To make it more interesting, one of the contestants will not speak English. (later a level with have clues written in that players language, I hope they don’t decide to leave that person behind)

Another contestant will be in a wheelchair, another will be a teenager, another will be in their 70’s. So that many contestants might be logical choices to leave behind but they all have skills that will come into play later.
I think everyone likes the play the “What would I do in that situation?” game in their head. Like the movie War of the Worlds. It doesn’t matter if you liked it or not, just about everyone says “Well I would have…” so now here is a game where you are in the emergency and what will you do is the question.

In fact, that is the title of the show.

What will you do?
The tagline is "you never leave a man behind’.

The Wide, Wonderful World of Entropy. Real-time video of paint drying, fruit drying out, cut flowers wilting, and parts of roadkill being carried off by carrion eaters.

…Ghost Mutt?

How about a remake of “The Wiz”, but with white people?

Didn’t Andy Warhol accomplish pretty much the same effect with that however-long-it-was view of the Empire State Building? And some of those stop-action things like Coppola did (Koyaanisqatsi comes to mind even if I can’t spell it) had rotting things galore.

How about three hours of unexposed film floating by?

Great! Start it out in B&W and then switch to color. Use Dark Side of the Moon for a soundtrack.

This would never catch on.

Is this the sequel that has the little girl that Forest Whitaker gave the book to and the ice cream vendor seeking revenge?

Empire was a loop of film. It ran and ran and ran until everyone left the theatre.

Yeah, but that was right when it gets to the good part!

Say, is that still running then?

Is it out on DVD?

I can just hear the voiceover on the trailer, “In a world…”

“The Tudors”

A lush costume drama starting with the reign of Henry VIII, and focusing on his queens and the sexual politics of the time. It could go all the way up to the death of Elizabeth I. There’s everything a show could want: sex, murder, heartbreak, betrayal, intrigue and love.

Not sure if this counts as original, but a series that takes classic sci fi stories and tells them in a series of 1 hour episodes. When they cover one story it moves on to another, some can be told in a a single episode, other will take half a season etc. Something like the twilight zone, only scripts will only be based on existing literature.
It’d be a legal, logistical, and monetary nightmare but I’d watch.

The British did this with two series in the 1960s – Out of This World and Out of the Unknown. I only know abou them from Peter Nichols’ Encyclopedia of Scence Fiction (and its update, with John Klute), and from searching the 'net.

Th shows adapted classic science fiction novels and short stories – they did I, Robot, for instance, and, I think, Caes of Steel.

I’d love to see episodes, but I’ve never seen any on VHS or DVD, and I don’t think it’s ever been run in the States.