I currently have a Matches ad in the *Reader, * and lemme tell you, it’s always an enlightening experience. This is the 3rd time I’ve placed the same ad. So far I’ve got a bunch of responses, most of which seem to be from genuinely nice and at least moderately interesting guys.
One in particular intrigued me…and then I realized it was the same guy who responded to the same ad the last time I placed it! maybe 4-5 months ago. His voice mail showed no signs that he remembered having spoken to me before. This would only be mildly amusing, except that a) I know it’s the same guy, because he gave some quite identifying characteristics about himself (unusual Chinese name, quirky Canadian accent, former profession, current career switch, etc). b) my name IRL is a bit unusual, and I’ve only known 2 other people in my life with the same name, so you’d think it would ring a bell, c) my ad is on the quirky side and not a word has been changed since I last posted it, and d) the kicker: we actually went for a cup of coffee the last time and ended up talking for 5 hours!
He was a super-nice guy, but I just didn’t feel like we’d clicked that way, and apparently he didn’t think so either, because there were no followup calls from either side. Still, it wasn’t that long ago, and I’m quite amazed and amused that nothing in my voicemail, etc. jogged his memory in the slightest. How can you carry on an animated conversation with someone for 5 hours, sitting 3 feet away from her, and not remember anything about her afterward?
So I’m thinking of calling him back now and ribbing him a bit about it. Not to be mean, but just to make him blush a little, and maybe pay attention when he leaves voice mails for people. Should I? If so, any ideas as to form and/or content?
I have had my share of unfathomably clueless episodes myself. You really should call him back. But be kind.
Unless you just dont want to actually go to the trouble of seeing him again, then you might consider going ahead with a date, and do things as much like the last time as before, to see when he catches on. Or maybe on that date, if he hasnt clued in by the time he sees you, keep pretending you’ve never met, but throw out comments about him that he hasnt told you that day. He might get really confused as to how you know these things about him.
Some people are just like that. Short term memory problems, I guess.
I once was invited to an out of town wedding as a friend of the groom. The bride hooked me up with her male cousin - not as a date - simply to share the ride to the wedding. Okay. We spoke a few times on the phone to set it up. He picked me up at my home, we drove down together, sat together at the wedding dinner, drove back together. No sparks, but a nice enough guy; we spoke at length for hours, danced, etc… Less than 2 months later, the bride’s mother died, and I saw him at the funeral services. No recollection whatsoever. Not just can’t remember your name, sorry type of thing, but - blank. Even when prompted, showed no sign of recall. Huh???
Call this guy if you want to. I’d bet he shows the same symptoms. Who knows - he might have really liked you when he met you - and then the amnesia kicked in before he had a chance to call again…
I gotta say, I love Roterhead’s suggestion …
THAT sounds like my kinda fun!
Waste of an evening, but, still, way fun!
Have to admit, though, I remember a conversation with a woman friend where she related meeting an interesting guy, in her … ‘wild oats’ days … enjoying him enough to decide his place was a more interesting end to the evening than home … and only realized they’d met before when she got there, and recognized the place … and he’d not remembered yet …
but I’m thinking that’s a different type of amnesia …
Eva, sorry about using the name Eve, before. Is there any chance I could see these ads of yours?
One time a doctor asked my friend out again on the street & she said to him "You forgot that you asked me out two weeks ago & I said ‘no’…He never asked again.
Well, I guess I could offer a prize to the person who picks out my ad by recognizing my SDMB persona…here’s a link to the Reader Matches, Women Seeking Men:
Well I can’t prove it, since I’m relying on you to confirm, and you might mess with my head (if your OP is anything to go by ;)) but I believe you are looking for someone who enjoys thinking/feeling?
Now that I think about it, I’m not entirely sure what anyone here is supposed to do with the above information, unless you are reasonably local (sorry **jjimm, ** that probably rules you out, if you would even have been interested anyway). But on the off chance that someone is, well, he now has a veritable treasure trove of information a few mouse clicks away. Oh well; I guess I believe in full disclosure, anyway.
I dunno, Eva – perchance the guy wants a second shot? Maybe he’s been thinking about this girl he went out with a couple of months ago that he really liked but that he was too nervous to really open up to, and he wants to give it another try with her. I guess I’d just tell the guy flat out, “Hey, I remember you from the last time we went out – I don’t really think there was any chemistry that time, though. Has something changed that you want to try going out again?”
I actually had something similar happen during my online dating phase… got an email from one particular girl, emailed a few times, didn’t seem that interesting to talk to (although she was HOT HOT HOT), so nothing ever materialized. Got another email from her about four months later and said what the heck. We met for dinner and had a great date… until she confessed that she had lied to me about her age. She’d told me she was 22 (I was 27 at the time)… and she turned out to be eighteen and lived at home with her parents. Check, please…
But be nice - it’s awfully easy to occasionally make a boob like that, and it’s not really an insult to you. Most people who do aren’t bad people really. Of course, it probably means your’e not made for each other (though not necessarily).
