To Rooster Cogburn, With Love, The King and I
John Wayne, Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes, Yul Brenner, and Debra Kerr star in this delightful romp that answers that immortal question, “Can a fat, crusty, drag queen find true love in the Siamese Imperial Court ruled over by a bald woman with one eye?” Truly, it is a puzzlement.
Well, so much for getting any work done today…
Priscilla, Queen of the Sands of Iwo Jima
Terrence Stamp and John Wayne dress in drag and travel across an isolated coral atoll to defeat the Japanese and raise a rainbow flag atop Mount Mr. Suribachi like the Dog He Is.
I just can’t help it … compulsive posting …
Staying Dead Alive
Zombies and Disco, baby.
Evil Dead Reefer Madness - Because who wouldn’t want to see Bruce Campbell fighting with zombified pyschotic stoners.
Dr. Phibes in Winter - Grisly deaths and bickering royalty combine as King Anton Phibes returns to his old castle to reap vengeance on his Machiavellian family.
Apollo-22 Tom Hanks plays an astronaut sent into space hoping to get injured so he doesn’t have to go into space. Bill Paxton guest stars as a fellow astronaut Major Major, promoted onto the vessel because that’s what Majors should be doing.
A Hard Day’s Night of the Living Dead The Fab Four run around London, eating fans’ brains.
Dude, Where’s my Christine? Two stoners out on a quirky comic quest to find their missing homicidal car.
Problem Children of the Corn John Ritter tries to be a good adoptive father to a Nebraska town full of murderous children.
Harold and Maude and Sid and Nancy and Alex and Emma A pair of multiple-personality-disorder sufferers try to write a romantic-comic-novel-about-wanting-to-die-while-playing-Punk-music.
What plnnr said, no work gettin’ done today …
Kramer vs. Freddy vs. Jason
Dustin Hoffman and Robert Englund engage in a bitter custody battle over their son, currently off at summer camp getting stoned and having premarital sex. Hilarity ensues.
The Greatest Neverending Story Ever Told… sorry, I got nothing
But I do have The Big Stand- Old friends gather at the funeral of another who died of a mysterious flu- personal & sexual difficulties are explored as they discover they are survivors of an Apocalyptic catastrophe & must face down the AntiChrist (played by Kevin Costner, who also plays the deceased friend now animated by the Walking Dude).
Oklathello!
Classic American musical, in which farmgirl Laurie-Desdemona has trouble choosing between her Moorish warrior-cowboy husband and the boorish hired-hand, with tragic results.
Daredevil’s Advocate’s Own
Al Pacino and Brad Pitt try to convince B-Fleck to join the IRA while Harrison Ford drinks and looks moody.
Stand and Deliverance
A math club camping trip goes bad. Reeeeeeeal bad.
btw, when I was visiting in L.A. a few weeks ago, there was a play- It’s A Stevie Wonderful Life… regretfully, I didn’t get out to see it
Cast A Deadly Godspell- Fred Ward as detective Lovecraft out to foil David Warner’s plan to invoke a Hippy Clown Second Coming using the ancient tome the Christonomicon.
The Boy With Blue Velvet Hair… Dean Stockwell in a dual role at different ages, one of which may be having sex with Dennis Hopper- EWWWW!
Final Destination Tokyo
A submarine sent on a recon mission to Japan meets with disaster, and the survivors are stalked by Death himself.
Please, for the love of all that’s holy, somebody stop me. 
Yup, not gettin’ much done today.
Polterhoma A family in a brand new state-sized subdivision has plans for a social disrupted when spirits suck Lauire into another dimension.
On Preview I see h.sapiens has beaten me to the punch with Rogers and Hammerstein, so we’ll try something else…
Who Framed Indiana Jones Adventurer at peril in exotic land of Toons while he attempts to find rare antiquities and clues about his brother’s death.
Jesus Christ Superman A charimatic leader with extraordinary powers runs afoul of authority figures and is ultimately betrayed by his best friend, Jimmy Olson.
One Flew Over the Planet of the Apes - A free-wheeling astronaut pretending to be insane is sent to the Forbidden Zone.
Mr. Terminator Goes to Washington - An android from the future is sent to fill a vacant seat in the U.S. Senate.
Charlie’s Angels on my Shoulder - Three beautiful women are sent back from death by the devil to solve crimes.
Little Big Lebowski - The life story of a 101 year old man who spend his life bowling in the old west.
The Man Who Came to My Dinner with Andre - Two well-meaning parents are uncomfortable with the fact their daughter is dating Wallace Shawn.
The Day the Earth Stood Still … I Want to Get Off – Gort and Klaatu try to stage Anthony Newley’s musical, with mixed results. Gort is too stiff.
**Big Top Gun Pee-Wee ** - The Air Force is hard pressed to deal with their new ace pilot, who may be a little mentally unbalanced… “Unbalanced… that’s the secret word! AAAHHHH!”
I will leave alone the potential of Pee-Wee’s Big Adventures in Babysitting…
And move on to **Wild, Wild West Side Story ** … where the gang rivalry between the Jet and the Sharks culiminates in a giant mechanical spider destroying those they hold most dear.
Gotta go, catching a showing of Remains of the Day of the Dead… Anthony Hopkins plays a zombie very naturally, I hear.
Three Men and a Baby Jane
Three carefree bachelors find their lives disrupted when they have to share their apartment with a deranged, murderous former child star.
I Am Curious (Yellow Submarine)
In his most enigmatic work to-date, Ingmar Bergman explores the Beatles’ sexuality in this animated romp set to psychedelic Swedish folkmusic. In Swedish, with Liverpudlian sub-titles.
Steel Magnolia
The lives of Tom Cruise, Phillip Seymor Hoffman, Dolly Parton, and Daryl Hannah entwine themselves while frogs rain down outside a beauty parlor in a small, Southern town.
Once Upon A Time in the West Side Story"
Sergio Leone and Leonard Bernstein combined forces to create this sweeping, lyric masterpiece about a Hispanic girl who must hold onto her block in Brooklyn before Henry Fonda can kill her boyfriend who is in a rival gang.
This actually sounds like a description of some alternate reality version of The Ladykillers.
This thread is hysterical, although at the risk of blowing my own horn, my favorites are Mr. Terminator Goes to Washington and Citizen Jaws. Oh, and Stand and Deliverance and Shoahboat.
Time After Time Bandits
H. G. Wells and his good friend Jack the Ripper join several tiny men who claim to be assistants to the Supreme Being on a romp through history, where they meet Napoleon, Agamemnon, Robin Hood, and Mary Steenburgen.