Please correct my Dutch co-workers bad English in this speech...

[Maastricht]

I’d be most grateful if any Dopers would be able to correct this welcoming speech.

It will be delivered by a local politician in three weeks. I have, hopefully, corrected the worst mistakes. Some of them would have really caused a lot of merriment, for all the wrong reasons. Could you have kept a straight face if confronted with an official talking about “a naughty river, behind new dykes?” No? That;'s what I thought.

So, are there really glaring mistakes left in this speech? Let me know, and don’t be polite about it

Thanks,

Maastricht

On behalf of the Governor of the Provice of Limburg, I wish you all a very warm welcome in our provincial building. We are here in the very seat of the government of the Province of Limburg. Yes, this province has e real ‘Governor’, and the building is therefore commonly called the “Gouvernement” (photo of Gouvernement). In the place where we are right now, the provincial parliament convenes every month

The provincial government is very proud to haven been asked to host this international conference.
We believe that the city of Maastricht is an apt place for this conference, as the city is situated in the heart of Europe, it’s historical role in the signing of the European Treaty and because Maastricht is so very near the Belgian and German borders.
The province of Limburg is eager/has the ambion ambitious to cooperate across it’s -very long- international borders (map of Limburg and international surroundings).

In this very building the treaty of Maastricht was signed in 1992, as a consequence of which the Euro was introduced in the European Union. You can see the table where the treaty was signed exhibited in the hall outside this room.

Furthermore, the city and the building are situated along the river Meuse, a major river crossing the borders between France, Belgium and The Netherlands. The Meuse’s tributaries extend in Gemany and Luxemburg). In fact, the architect designed this Gouvernement building right on top of the river Meuse. which you can see if you look out of the window. Looking south, the hills in Belgium are visible. For all these reasons, (and let’s not forget the exellent catering in this building, which I can vouch for personally) the organisation committee thought the Maastricht Gouvernent it would be the right place for this conference, and we happily agreed.

There is another reason why we accepted the invitation to host this conference. This is because the river Meuse, which is usually so calm and beautiful, can turn destructive. Just in the past hundred years, the Meuse valley in the Netherlands saw three major floods, as well as dozens of minor ones. Whole villages were inundated in 1926, 1993 and 1995. The damage was enormous. Only large scale evacuations prevented human deaths. (photo inundations along river Meuse). The flooded area covered almost one tenth of our province. After the 1995 inundations we built emergency levees in Limburg. Furthermore, we are now working on deepening and widening the river to prevent future inundations. In 2003 these earthworks were put to the test, as as another peak flood of almost 3.000 m3/s reached Limburg through the river Meuse. Our efforts proved succesfull: not three villages, but only one, and just a part of that one village, was flooded,.

Although the Meuse is by far the most important river in Limburg, there are many other small rivers which cross the Dutch borders with either Germany or Belgium. Further upstream, tributaries from Luxemburg and France flow to the main river. Therefore the Meuse River is a typical example of an international (European) River which needs an international (European) approach.

Evidently, a good flood risk policy is of great importance for all of us to manage flood risks now and in the future. The predicted climate change has only made the importance greater. The European Flood Directive and the development of Flood Risk Management Plans provide good opportunities to strengthen our flood risk policy and to cooperate with our international neighbours to manage and diminish the flood threaths.

The Dutch province of Limburg plays a part in three important aspects of flood risk management: prevention, spatial planning, and crisis management. That is why the province will be the one to coordinate the implementation of the Flood Directive in this region. For the implementation of the Flood Risk Management Plans the province is highly reliant on other institutions, especially the two water boards and the two safety organisations (What is the English expression?) in the province.

The province of Limburg considers the River Basin approach provided in the (European?) Flood Directive as essential to effectively diminish flood risk in the main rivers. For instance, measures to reduce peak discharges should be implemented in the entire international X basin in order to reduce peak levels along the X but – at the same time - also in its tributaries. Integration with other goals like nature development and enhancing environmental quality are necessary to deal with the intensive use of land. /scarcity of land/pressure on land (pm check engelse term).

The Dutch water boards have already provided a substantial amount of water retention in small catchments and tributaries of the river X by small basins, land use planning and remeandering of streams (photo “regenwaterbuffers”, “hermeandering”). In the main river the … project just north of X on the border with Belgium is under implementation, in which the river is widened by selective gravel extraction resulting in nature development. Along the river Meuse two large retention areas were realised. More measures will be taken in the next decade(s).

Together with all relevant partners in and outside the province of Limburg we aim to make careful, (thorough, effective…) Flood Risk Management Plans for the River Basin. Plans which take nature into consideration.
In X we call the river X often “mother” X to pay respect to her natural character.
She will need natural room in her international Basin, otherwise she will take this room herself. (not a very mother-like behaviour, by the way)
Let us together cherish our Mother River, by loving her beauty, saving and improving her natural assets, and make use of her multiple functions; at the other hand, take care of her wild dissipations, and guard her from collateral damage during her wilder days.

I wish you a good Symposium.

[Dinsdale]

@Maastricht

I wish you all a very warm welcome in our provincial building.

Looks pretty good, other than for this part I would substitute “Would you like to come up to my apartment bouncy bouncy.”

[Dinsdale]

Slightly more seriously:

We believe that the city of Maastricht is an apt place for this conference, as the city is situated in the heart of Europe, it’s historical role in the signing of the European Treaty and because Maastricht is so very near the Belgian and German borders. The structure of this sentence is not parallel.

The province of Limburg is eager/has the ambion ambitious ? to cooperate across it’s -very long- lengthy international borders (map of Limburg and international surroundings).

In fact, the architect designed this Gouvernement building right on top **next to?**of the river Meuse. which you can see if you look out of the window. Looking south, the hills in Belgium are visible. For all these reasons, (and let’s not forget the exellent catering in this building, which I can vouch for personally) the organisation committee thought the Maastricht Gouvernent it delete would be the right place for this conference, and we happily agreed.

The flooded area covered almost one tenth of our province. After the 1995 inundations **flood?**we built emergency levees in Limburg. Furthermore, we are now working on deepening and widening the river to prevent future inundations. In 2003 these earthworks were put to the test, as as another peak flood of almost 3.000 m3/s reached Limburg through the river Meuse. Our efforts proved succesfull: not three villages, I don’t understand the reference to 3 villagesbut only one, and just a part of that one village, was flooded,.

The European Flood Directive and the development of Flood Risk Management Plans provide good opportunities to strengthen our flood risk policy and to cooperate with our international neighbours to manage and diminish the flood threathssp.

The Dutch province of Limburg plays a part in three important aspects of flood risk management: prevention, spatial planning, and crisis management. That is why the province will be the one to coordinate the implementation of the Flood Directive in this region. For the implementation of the Flood Risk Management Plans the province is highly reliant on other institutions, especially the two water boards and the two safety organisations (What is the English expression?) safety organization is finein the province.

Integration with other goals like nature development and enhancing environmental quality are necessary to deal with the intensive use of land. /scarcity of land/pressure on land (pm check engelse term) intensive use is good.
Together with all relevant partners in and outside the province of Limburg we aim to make careful, (thorough, effective…) I’d say effective, but depends on your precise meaningFlood Risk Management Plans for the River Basin. Plans which take nature into consideration.
In X we call the river X often “mother” X to pay respect to her natural character.
She will need natural room in her international Basin, otherwise she will take this room herself. (not a very mother-like behaviour, by the way)Apparently you don’t know my mother

I wish you a good Symposium.My hovercraft is full of eels

[Baron_Greenback]

@Maastricht

Let us together cherish our Mother River, by loving her beauty, saving and improving her natural assets, and make use of her multiple functions; at the other hand, take care of her wild dissipations, and guard her from collateral damage during her wilder days.

This is a slightly awkward paragraph - I’d rewrite it like this:

Let us together cherish our Mother River, by loving her beauty, by saving and improving her natural assets, and by making use of her multiple functions. On the other hand, we must also take care of her wild dissipations, and guard her from collateral damage during her wilder days.

The first sentence has the repeated “by” which is a useful rhetorical thing for a concluding paragraph (allows emphasis and hand gestures), but in the second sentence “wild dissipations” just doesn’t sound right at all, but as I’m unclear what the intention is here I’m struggling to suggest something else.

[Quartz]

@Maastricht

On behalf of the Governor of the Provice of Limburg, I wish you all a very warm welcome in our provincial building.

‘to our provincial building.’ Unless the speaker is trying to make a joke about how cold it is outside. But you might want to change it to something more glamorous than ‘provincial building’ like Town Hall. This filters right the way through. ‘Provincial’ has negative connotations in English.

The provincial government is very proud to haven been

‘The Government of the Province of Limburg is very proud to have been’

The province of Limburg is eager/has the ambion ambitious

Keep it as simply ‘eager’

Meuse’s tributaries extend in Gemany and Luxemburg).

‘extend to’ is grammatically correct, but I’d suggest rewriting it as ‘the Meuse has tributaries which rise in Germany and Luxemburg’

In fact, the architect designed this Gouvernement building right on top of the river Meuse.

Repetition.

Looking south, the hills in Belgium are visible.

Drop the passive voice!

For all these reasons, (and let’s not forget the exellent catering in this building, which I can vouch for personally)

If the audience have already partaken, drop the ‘which I can vouch for personally’; if the audience are going to partake, change it to something like ‘which we will enjoy shortly’.

the organisation committee thought the Maastricht Gouvernent it would

Drop the ‘it’

is because the river Meuse, which is usually so calm and beautiful,

‘… is because the Meuse, usually so …’

There’s no need to keep calling it ‘the river Meuse’.

Netherlands saw three major floods,

‘has seen’, not ‘saw’.

Our efforts proved succesfull: not three villages, but only one, and just a part of that one village, was flooded,.

‘Our efforts proved successful: only one small part of one village suffered flooding.’

Although the Meuse is by far the most important river in Limburg, there are many other small rivers which cross the Dutch borders with either Germany or Belgium. Further upstream, tributaries from Luxemburg and France flow to the main river. Therefore the Meuse River is a typical example of an international (European) River which needs an international (European) approach.

European is better than international IMHO. And you don’t need to keep calling it ‘the Meuse river’ - just ‘the Meuse’ will do.

Evidently,

Excise this.

The predicted climate change has only made the importance greater.

‘The predictions of climate change only make…’

The European Flood Directive and the development of Flood Risk Management Plans provide good opportunities to strengthen our flood risk policy and to cooperate with our international neighbours to manage and diminish the flood threaths.

‘to cooperate with our European neighbours … the flood threats’

The Dutch province of Limburg

Is there a German one? A Belgian one?

plays a part in three important aspects of flood risk management: prevention, spatial planning, and crisis management.

Try ‘planning’, not ‘spatial planning’.

That is why the province will

'That is why the Province of Limburg will ’

For the implementation of the Flood Risk Management Plans the province is highly reliant on other institutions, especially the two water boards and the two safety organisations (What is the English expression?) in the province.

Simply name them all. The speaker should nod to the representatives of each in turn.

The province of Limburg considers the River Basin approach provided in the (European?) Flood Directive

‘European Flood Directive of (year)’.

Integration with other goals like nature development and enhancing environmental quality are necessary to deal with the intensive use of land. /scarcity of land/pressure on land (pm check engelse term).

Not quite sure what the point is here. Do they want to balance quality of life with urban pressures?

Along the river Meuse two large retention areas were realised.

‘Along the Meuse we have created two large flood retention areas’ Or put in the name of the organisation that created them.

Together with all relevant partners in

Excise ‘all relevant’

and outside the province of Limburg we aim to make careful, (thorough, effective…)

Don’t need any of those three.

Flood Risk Management Plans for the River Basin. Plans which take nature into consideration.
In X we call the river X often “mother” X to pay respect to her natural character.
She will need natural room in her international Basin, otherwise she will take this room herself. (not a very mother-like behaviour, by the way)

Lame joke alert! But it gets worse:

Let us together cherish our Mother River, by loving her beauty, saving and improving her natural assets,

Breast implants?

and make use of her multiple functions;

Cook, clean, and fuck?

at the other hand, take care of her wild dissipations,

Ah, an easy lay.

and guard her from collateral damage during her wilder days.

She gets drunk easily?

Ugh! What a horrible ending.

Hope this helps. I’m sure I’ve missed loads.

[jjimm]

It’s always “welcome to”.

[Dinsdale]

Let us together cherish our Mother River, by loving her beauty, saving and improving her natural assets, and make use of her multiple functions; at the other hand, take care of her wild dissipations, and guard her from collateral damage during her wilder days.

… on the other hand/at the same time, protect ourselves from incurring damage during her wilder days.

[Marienee]

Check your email, I did a little reworking rather than translating as I figured I have a better shot than most at figuring out why she said things just the way she did.

I hope it’s still your email anyway.

BTW, everything else I got. The hoogheemraadschap was clear. But what is she talking about with the safety organization? It can’t be the veiligheidsdienst unless y’all are very literal with your approach to terrorism there in Limburg (g) and otherwise I am coming up with nothin’.

Note to get me out of trouble for use of furrin languages: *the hoogheemraadschap or waterschap is a water board, a form of government which only the Dutch have (and which is really what this speech should center on but I digress). A veiligheidsdienst is a secret service, but is literally translated as the “safety service” or “safety organization”. *

[panache45]

Will this speech also be released in printed form? If so, you need to learn the difference between “its” and “it’s.” The possessive is “its.”

[PookahMacPhellimey]

@Quartz

Is there a German one? A Belgian one?

There is a Belgian province of Limburg too.

[Nava]

@Marienee

Note to get me out of trouble for use of furrin languages: the hoogheemraadschap or waterschap is a water board, a form of government which only the Dutch have (and which is really what this speech should center on but I digress).

What does it do? Sounds like it might be related to Spanish Confederaciones Hidrográficas (which manage water resources in an area: rivers, canals, springs, purification plants, etc.)

Other people have gone into more detail; what I saw is many sentences which have things in the wrong order. The words are (mostly) correct (and corrections have been posted already), but the order of the different parts of the sentence isn’t. It kind of looks like what would happen if someone who didn’t know better translated “blanco y negro” from Spanish to English: it would be “white and black,” but in English you never say it like that, you say “black and white.”

[Marienee]

Well, this is Holland. So what they do is manage water resources, which means that they are responsible for the continued existence of the nation. (Leaving out the Delta Works for the moment).

They started in the 13th century and continue to this day. The uniquely Dutch part is that they are (and have always been) decentralized – not drawing power from nor answering to a central authority (except under the Spanish which is a great story all by itself) but their functioning (and the continued existence of the nation) is entirely dependent on communal cooperation. The Dutch believe that this is because of the nature of the task.

The concepts of a functioning government, lines of power, derivation of power, and so on as they are understood in the Netherlands are based on this model. Most of the Dutch (like the speech writer) do not appear to realize that this is unusual.

[Nava]

@Marienee

Most of the Dutch (like the speech writer) do not appear to realize that this is unusual.

Most of the [insert nationality here] do not appear to realize that [insert stuff which varies by country] is unusual. What cracks me up is when on one hand people will do something like complain about that time they travelled abroad and foreigners acted foreign - and on the other they don’t make the connection with “in different countries, people do things differently.”

Thanks for the response, much appreciated.

[Marienee]

Oh, it cracks me up too but mostly it’s me doing it. Not travelling though. No matter how many times I am slammed upside the head with it, my brain continues to believe that it knows what normal is, while the folks around me persistently believe the same thing, only the normal we are talking about is not at all the same thing and somehow this does nto get realized by anybody until it is much too late. If I am lucky, we get a good laugh out of it. Otherwise I just look like an idiot again. I am getting used to it though.

[Maastricht]

Thanks Quartz, panache45 and Dinsdale! (and Marinee for her e-mail version!) You guys rock.

It’s a bit sobering to see just HOW bad our Dutch English can be. I have to admit, a lot of the text didn’t look that “off” even to me, untill I saw the contrast with your corrections. Like Nava’s “white and black”-example.

Well, I’ll use all suggestions tomorrow, so my politician still has time to learn it by heart (no teleprompters here; we really are provincial )

Thanks again!

@PookahMacPhellimey

There is a Belgian province of Limburg too.

Correct, and officials of that province will probably be among the audience.

Fot those who want to know more, here’s Wikipediaon water boards.

[Quartz]

My pleasure. I hope it goes well. But your politician shouldn’t worry about going to the lectern with the speech written down - simply put it on the lectern before he enters. He also has a copy in his jacket pocket, of course. Just in case.

[yojimbo]

I go with learning the speech by heart and also having it written in large writing spread over lots of numbered flash cards which I discard as I go. That way if you forget where you are you can find it easily and quickly rather than try to scan a A4 page of text with people waiting for you to start again.

[Marienee]

@Maastricht

It’s a bit sobering to see just HOW bad our Dutch English can be. I have to admit, a lot of the text didn’t look that “off” even to me, untill I saw the contrast with your corrections. Like Nava’s “white and black”-example. .

It isn’t bad at all. It is the difference between writing a language and thinking in it. The speechwriter’s way of working around her central image and what she thinks it illustrates work well in Dutch. But when you try to speak a Dutch speech by putting English words in, it doesn’t work the same way. There are sentence structures in Dutch which are not passive but which translate into the passive voice, use of pronouns is substantially different, and god knows Dutch accomodates relation of sentences with multiple subordinate clauses in ways that give English a headache.

It is very common for native speakers of english to make the same kinds of errors in writing if they have been speaking/working in Dutch for a while. The only people I know who do not do it are people who learned both languages from a very early age.