We help our animal friends when they cannot continue and consider that the most noble thing we can do.
And yet we are so terrified of our own mortality that we cannot grant each other the same.
I agree. I’m not afraid of being dead, I know what will happen. but I’m terribly afraid of a long and painful illness, or of suffering from dementia and not knowing what’s going on for real.
I think there are valid reasons for being concerned about euthanasia other than just a fear of mortality. We also put our animal friends to sleep for peeing on the rug, not to mention millions of healthy shelter pets who die just because nobody wants them. Putting Grandma to sleep because she peed on the rug or putting a homeless person to sleep because nobody wants to take them in would be a harder sell to most of society. 
Any situations where killing people is condoned is a ripe breeding ground for abuse of human rights and I do think it is right for people to be concerned about that aspect of things.
Exactly. Having twice experienced a terminal illness with someone I loved, all I could think was how I would be ashamed of someone who would let an animal suffer like this.
Unfortunately, the idea that abuses may happen is seldom used to ensure proper oversight to minimize said abuses, and all too often used to completely deny everyone the right to do something.
You know, if there were even a single Right to Die facility in Britain, and let’s say 5-6 in the USA (based on population) that had very strict oversight and documentation policies, then we would at least have something. Currently we have people whose minds are gone and bodies artificially kept alive with zero hope of recovery… precisely because we are so terrified of death that we refuse to let them go. If we did that to any other species, we would rightfully be called monsters.
It’s not a terror of death; it’s a terror of killing.
It is not so much the people whose minds are ‘gone’ that euthanasia is a release, it is the people who have full mental capacity, but a body in persistent pain or other intractable suffering (e.g. Locked in syndrome) that benefit from having the option. Some one whose mind has gone will never be able to consent to euthanasia, Dignitas, I believe, doesn’t take anyone with dementia or who cannot positively consent.
My grandmother died after Alzheimer’s had taken her mind. My mother has Alzheimer’s, and it’s heartbreaking to be with her. I figure that I’ll die from either complications of diabetes or Alzheimer’s. I hope that I recognize the symptoms of Alzheimer’s in time to be able to commit suicide. I don’t want to follow in my grandmother’s and mother’s footsteps. It’s not just the lack of dignity, but it’s incredibly costly in monetary terms for the family, and it’s emotionally costly.
Suicide is emotionally costly for those around you. Please, with all due respect, try to remember that.
Terry Pratchett also made a fantastic documentary on the subject, whose name escapes me just now.
I highly recommend it, but I won’t ever watch it again.
My daughter-in-law had the same family history. She and my son had a suicide pact when she turned 35, the age her mother started showing signs of Alzheimer’s.
My son was 33, she was 35. She survived, he did not. It was much more emotionally costly for me.
Death itself is emotionally costly for those around you, and that’s a guaranteed event that everyone knows is inevitable. It being self-inflicted death won’t make much difference really.
Christ, that’s horrible. But - and I hate to add a but to a post like that - I don’t think many people would assume that such an extremely early onset of Alzheimer’s would show up so early again, and that their spouse should die too.
OTOH, if your dil had had the legal option of delayed self-termination - a living will - then perhaps she wouldn’t have felt the need to commit suicide so early, or your son would have had a further reason not to join her.
One must be sure to have a “living will,” final directive, or whatever it’s called where you live. You should also be sure to have a Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care. That specific document (in NJ, anyway) assures that the person named is empowered to make all health care decisions for you if you are for any reason unable to make them for yourself. And discuss your wishes with everyone who might be involved.
Some years back it made things much easier for my sister and me when our father was in his final illness to tell the medical people that they were to give him as much painkillers as necessary to keep him comfortable even if it speeded his death. It was what he wanted and he had talked about it with us many times.
It was horrible when my mother was dying and begging us to get her more pain medication and they wouldn’t do so because my [expletive deleted] father had left the necessary documents home – three hours away from the hospital where the failed surgery had been done. Mercifully, she passed away overnight, but her suffering could have been eased earlier.
One of the most amazing things about the Dope is the variety of people we have as contributors. One, Blinkie, has locked-in syndrome. He created a very informative thread about it, and has contributed his story to Teemings.
I’m not sure I understand this. Your DIL and your son both have family histories of Alzheimers, and because of this they made a mutual pact that they would both commit suicide at age 35 because of the risk of this happening in the future, and she survived this suicide effort and he dd not.
Is that correct?
None of the people criticizing his stance are currently facing the same issues. I applaud Terry, and I agree with him whole heartedly.
We, as a society, must face death instead of pretending it only happens to “other people” and even then, only rarely. Each and every person on this planet owes death it’s due. All of us, each of you reading this little note on a bbs, we all owe the same debt.
We should, we must, come to realize that, and to grant each of us the dignity, if possible, of the choice of selecting our own time. It is the grossest barbarity and the most insulting imposition, to not let someone pick their own time and place, of paying that debt owed.
Regards,
-Bouncer-
Yes, I know this. However, watching someone die by inches is also emotionally costly. And financially costly.
My mother isn’t alive any more. Only her shell is alive. Every time I visit that shell, it tears me up. My father died almost 10 months ago, and it tore me up, but he died quickly…and even though I still grieve for him, and miss him, it’s not an active, recurring pain.
No, I really don’t understand why they did what they did at the time they did it. My son was healthy. We have no family history of anything. My best guess is, he just thought he wouldn’t be able to live without her.
They had chosen age 40. Why 35, I have no idea. She told me this after. She doesn’t remember why that day was different.
She survived and to my knowledge, has never tried again. I’ve lost contact with her over the years.