I wipe first. I want one of those seats that spray nice warm water on my anus, the dries it with warm air. I hear google employee restrooms have them.
This summer, after (and if) I get my tax return.
Ah, a warm, dry, sewie hole. The little things in life.
Peace,
mangeorge
What the heck?! You *pull *the feces off of your anus?
Valete,
Vox Imperatoris
Of course, wiping is just a better word for smearing. A good pinch gets the poop off much better than spreading it like butter all over your taint.
I just went and measured from my toilet seat to the top of the water. Just under six inches.
Counting the droop, and assuming flaccid, that’s pretty impressive. 
My nuts tend to take a dip. Sadly that does not impress anyone but me.
So you think.
About the direction-does anybody else know what a “taint” is?
anom
That space between the playground and the dump. Tain’t nuts and Tain’t ass…
Oh! now I see #63!
I think if I didn’t sit I would fall over. Not a kid anymore and my knees aren’t what they used to be…
No more fascinating discussion of toilet habits? 
Valete,
Vox Imperatoris
Well, once when I had a really bad case of food poisoning, I’d just gotten out of the shower and was brushing my teeth…
Not a habit, but it was interesting. My (ex)wife was a true jewel.
Cheer up, I’m impressed. 
He is doubly (or triply) impressive; if he’s not careful, ***all ***his parts get quite wet. He has to hold everything while he sits down, then lays it all on the seat.
But swimming trunks are a bigger problem.
Yeah, I don’t really see the issue with standing, either. When you’re sitting, your cheeks are spread to avoid getting mess on both sides. So then you roll off a piece of TP, put it in one hand, and with the other grab a cheek and pull it to one side while you stand. Now you’re standing and you still have your cheeks spread. The first wipe should (theoretically) get the poo that’s not directly on your anus (as well as some that is on your anus). There shouldn’t be too much of it because your cheeks were spread the whole time. Now when you let go, the only poo that should be left is directly on your anus, which means you’re not spreading anything around by letting your cheeks come together.
I mean seriously, when my tax refund arrives. I mean to do a little research and pick one soon. I’ve been thinking about it for several years. Time to, er, get off the pot.
Women have one too, but one of the tain’ts is different (lucky us). An innie, instead of an outie.
These are pretty standard in Japan. Not to brag or anything, but I have a urinal AND a heated toilet seat. Kinda makes up for the fact that my bathroom is the same temperature as the outdoors.
Does your’s have the warm water wash/rinse and air dry feature? I know they’ve been around in Japan, and lately Europe, for a while. I’m interested in opinions. Could start another thread, but this one seems apporpriate. We shall see. I wanna urinal!
How come nobody’s mentioned hemorrhoids? Do thay make a difference in stand/sit.
I’ve heard and read that the wash seats are good for hemorrhoid sufferers. Sounds right.
sitting to wipe? how do you know your all done? standing is better you can see and just drop it in without having to take it out of the bowl to look on it