What would the circumstances be if you would and why wouldn’t you if not?
For the guys, if they want to be included too, suppose your wife was barren would you agree to use a surrogate mother?
Nope, I wouldn’t do it.
I think society would be better off if we had more people pursuing foster parenting and adoption rather than infertility treatments, so I don’t see any reason to participate in this sort of thing myself (not that I would try to stop someone who wanted to pursue it; I just don’t want to be part of it).
I would.
If my little sister for some reason could not concieve, I’d surrogate in a heartbeat if I was asked.
That’s the only circumstance I can think of that would warrant it.
I probably would have, because I enjoyed being pregnant and giving birth (okay - call me a masochist if you must). It would have been enormously gratifying to give a couple the gift of a child. Alas, that choice was taken away from me, so I’ll never know. I definitely would have considered it at the time, though.
A little part of why I would is for this very reason. I LOVED being pregnant, and I enjoyed giving birth (naturally - no drugs, no epidural.) And my husband thinks pregnant women are the most gorgeous creatures on the planet.
And most definitely, to be able to give my sister a child if she could not have one of her own would be an incredible honor.
I had a terrible pregnancy and even more horrible delivery. I never want to give birth or carry a child again.
So that would be a no for me.
I wouldn’t hesitate to do it for someone else, but never for myself (mental health/family issues and all). Actually, it’s something I’ve wanted to, would LOVE to actually, do forever for an interested gay couple because they can sometimes have such a hard time adopting and I’d be thrilled to help in a way that might seem difficult otherwise. Just as long as their (anyone, rather) have a healthy, good union. I’d hope that I could at least bbe kept tangentially informed about the child as it grows up.
However, with said problems above, I don’t know if I’d be a good canidate or not.
I am so emotional about pregnancy, I don’t think I could go through it and then give the baby away. I’d get too attached.
I’d probably do it for my little brother if he and his wife couldn’t. (Of course, he’s 20 and in college and doesn’t even have a lady friend, so that’s quite a far off possibility.) I’d have to go through it myself first, I’d hate to go through all the work of making my brother’s baby and then have it mess the place up and keep me from having my own.
I wouldn’t do it now because I’m too old to be a good surrogate, but if a family member or very close friend had asked me when I was in my prime childbearing years (after I’d had my two), I’d have seriously considered it. I think I’d have been far more likely to say yes if the baby was not to be my genetic child. I’m not sure it’s rational, but I would find it much harder to give up a child that was mine genetically than one who I had merely (ha!) carried for nine months.
I’d do it in a heartbeat for my sister, but that’s not likely to happen, as no doctor would clear me for it, since I’m a diabetic.
I would never do it. I just wouldn’t be able to give away a baby.
I would have considered doing it only for my sister, or for my brother if his wife had not had a sister.
I never wanted to have children myself, but had commercial surrogate motherhood been an available profession when I was young enough, I would have been knocked up in a heartbeat! Of course, I’ve never been pregnant, so my first might well have been my last had I found it to be horrible.
What Oy said. But also what lavenderviolet said.
In other words, I’ve never wanted kids, but have always been wildly curious about what pregnancy feels like, so if I were young enough, I’d do it in a heartbeat (and the added bonus, even if the pregnancy turned out to be horrible, is that I’d be helping to make some person or couple incredibly happy).
If I did want kids and couldn’t conceive, however, I wouldn’t do it myself; I’d adopt. In fact, I like to think that I’d adopt even if I were able to conceive (and then perhaps conceive as well).
No I wouldn’t because I have mental illness and genetic problems in my family.
That said, having lived in NJ and followed the Baby M case very closely, I don’t see anything wrong with surrogacy if the candidates are screened carefully and if the father has a right to custody if the birth mother contests it.
considered doing it for family, but we’ve always been big on adoption.
I wouldn’t have it done for myself because if I couldn’t the pull wouldn’t be there for a ‘genetic’ child of me … I was hesitant about the mildest of infertilty treatments for myself when there are so many adoptables out there.
Replace “little sister” with “big sister” here and these are my feelings. My sister says she doesn’t want kids at all, but if she changed her mind and asked me to help, I’d do it.
This past 4 of July at a family gathering I offered to be a surrogate for my cousin and her husband. They have been trying to get pregnant for the last 10 years. She got pregnant once and miscarried early on. They money they have spent on fertility drugs is unbelievable. I would not have a problem being implanted with a fertilized egg. I would not have a problem “giving” away a baby as it would not be mine, it would be theirs, a part of each of them. I would just be a host, a real live babysitter. I will be seeing my cousin next month and we will be talking more then. I love my kids and know what they mean to me and how they have positively affected my life, and if I could do that for someone else, I certainly would.
I would, absolutely. There was a period last year where we seriously considered offering my uterus to some friends who were having problems conceiving.